It's a very sobering article, and I think it's a very good one. Personally, I was thinking about today's 242. Dehua commended me for being very enthusiastic in serving the Lord, and in loving His people. To be honest, yeah, I feel very encouraged when he said that. But I have to think of it with sober judgement - and on the way back home, I think God reminded me of this verse in Proverbs: "The furnace for gold, and the crucible for silver, but man is tested by the praise that he receives." Or as WZ would say, "Don't swell." Hee...
So when I went back home, thought about it, and remembered that it's only, and only, by the grace of God that I can be enthusiastic for God.
I knelt down and really thanked Him for today, because I remember very clearly back in the NUS ministry, there was this long, long period of time from 2004 to 2005 where I had lost my passion and first love for God, that my CL was so concerned that he took me aside, and asked me, "Previously you were so on fire for God... now what has happened to you?"
Galatians 4:14-15a
"Even though my illness was a trial to you, you did not treat me with contempt or scorn. Instead, you welcomed me as if I were an angel of God, as if I were Christ Jesus himself. What has happened to all your joy?"
So today was a sobering time, especially after reading this article. Thought about it, and reflected that I could be so enthusiastic for God, but in the end I could be the one who betrays Him. Sobering, isn't it? I'm not saying it as a negative thing... I'm just being realistic.
And I think it is good to acknowledge and accept that fact, that at one time or another in our lives, we WILL betray Jesus, despite our swearing never to betray Him. Peter said to Jesus. I think what matters in the end is our response to Him after that. Will we respond like Peter, or respond like Judas? Or like how John came back to be with Jesus at the cross after deserting Him initially?
"I will lay down my life for Thy sake." Peter's declaration was honest but ignorant. "Jesus answered him... The cock shall not crow, till thou hast denied Me thrice." This was said with a deeper knowledge of Peter than Peter had of himself. He could not follow Jesus because he did not know himself, of what he was capable. Natural devotion may be all very well to attract us to Jesus, to make us feel His fascination, but it will never make us disciples. Natural devotion will always deny Jesus somewhere or other.
Oswald Chambers
For maybe it's when we know that we WILL fall, and cry out to Him to help us, that He immediately catches us by our hand, and say, "Here I am."
"Watch and pray, so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." He knows us far better than we ourselves do.
So here's a condensed version of the article:
******
About his suicide, very little needs to be said. The Bible tells us that "he went away and hanged himself." It is the final act of a man who could not live with himself and the memory of what he had done. In the ultimate irony on this tragic day, Judas died before Jesus did.
The Way It Was
But it was not always that way. If we go to the beginning, we find a remarkable series of facts about Judas:
* He was personally chosen to be an apostle by Jesus Christ.
* He forsook all to follow the Lord.
* He spent 3 1/2 years traveling the length and breadth of Israel with Christ.
* He saw all the miracles of Christ in person.
* He heard Christ give all his famous discourses.
* He watched as Christ healed the sick, raised the dead and cast out demons.
* He, along with the other apostles, was sent out to preach the gospel.
* He was one of the leaders of the apostolic band.
* No one ever suspected him of treason.
In terms of experience, whatever you can say about James, Peter and John, you can say also about Judas. Everywhere they went, he also went. He was right there, always by the side of Jesus. He heard it all, saw it all, experienced it all. However you explain his defection, you cannot say he was less experienced than the other apostles.
If anything, he was one of the leaders. After all, the other apostles chose him to handle the money. You don’t pick a man whose loyalty you suspect to handle your money. That’s crazy. You pick your best man, your most trustworthy man, the one man you know you can count on. That’s why they picked Judas.
The most interesting part of this story is that the other apostles apparently saw only the positive side of Judas. It wasn’t until they looked back after the fact that they could see the negatives. Before his betrayal of Jesus, he looked as good as any of the rest, and in fact he probably looked better than most. In that light, let us note it for the record one more time: No one suspected Judas. No one.
Three Questions For Us
As we think about the strange, sad story of Judas, several questions rise to the surface. These are questions not about Judas but about you and me. They ask us to consider how much of Judas lives inside each of us today. And before we consider these questions, consider this: The more religious you are, the more likely you are to do what Judas did...
Question 1: How Has God Disappointed You?
f there is any way to understand Judas, it is at the point of personal disappointment. Perhaps he truly believed that Jesus had let him down and in his own twisted way felt justified in his act of treachery. But is that so much different from the way we feel when we think God has let us down?
Let us face the fact that God often fails to live up to our expectations. Sometimes he simply doesn’t do what we think he ought to do. We have certain standards for the God of the universe—and he doesn’t always meet them. Judas couldn’t live with disappointment so he betrayed the Lord. What about you?
Question 2: What Would You Trade For Jesus?
One of the ironic parts of this story is that Judas didn’t get much for his money. In those days, 30 pieces of silver was the price of a slave—about $20. Judas went to hell and the cost of his ticket was 30 pieces of silver.
* What would you trade for Jesus?
* Would you betray him for money?
* Would you betray him for a better job?
* Would you betray him to keep the job you have?
* Would you betray him to save your own skin?
* Would you betray him to get a better grade in school?
* Would you betray him for a date to the prom?
* Would you betray him for a new contract?
* Would you betray him for a million dollars?
* Would you betray him to find a husband or a wife?
* Would you betray him because he didn’t live up to your expectations?
* Would you betray him because you thought he let you down?
* Would you betray him if you thought you could win the favor of important people?
The story of Judas asks us to probe at the level of our personal motivation. Why do you serve the Lord anyway? How much is the Son of God worth to you?
Question 3: Are You a Second Judas?
It can happen to any of us. Judas kissed the door of heaven but went to hell. Jesus picked him as an apostle but he went to hell. He lived with Jesus for three years and still went to hell. He watched Jesus walk on the water and still went to hell. He listened to the Sermon on the Mount and still went to hell. He ate with Jesus, talked with Jesus, walked with Jesus, and listened to Jesus day after day, month after month, year after year. He knew Jesus as well as one has ever known Jesus and still he went to hell.
And remember this. None of the disciples suspected him. That’s why he was chosen to be the treasurer. They trusted him to keep their money. Even at the Last Supper, when Jesus identified Judas publicly, they still couldn’t figure it out.
...
After all, if one can be an apostle of Christ and still be lost, what about you and what about me? Perhaps we may conclude the matter this way. One apostle was lost, that none should presume. Eleven were saved, that none should despair. In the end, most of us who call ourselves Christians will search our hearts and conclude that Yes, although we fail him in many ways, we do love Jesus and claim him as our Savior. That is as it should be. The story of Judas is in the Bible for many reasons, not the least of which is that before we take anything for granted, we at least ask the question the other apostles asked that fateful night: "Lord, is it I?"
*******
Mmm... so realised I have some past disappointments with God - e.g. my not getting an NUS undergrad scholarship... (that time, I was disappointed with Him - had asked Him to help me with the interview, but I became very nervous through that time.)... that time due to some miscommunications, my team almost missed a critical project deadline and we all scored miserably for that module (I got a D+).
But I think, in the end, after looking back, I have decided to trust His promise that in all things, He works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose. :) And perhaps, maybe, in the future, I'll be so glad that I didn't get any Honours degree despite my best efforts. Perhaps it's because God knows me better than I do... that getting a Hons degree might make me complacent, both physically and spiritually, causing me to trust in myself to succeed in life, rather than to lean on Him for His help. :) Think that's one way how I can choose to see how God is working for my good.
Hee! Sorry, so long... still have so much more to write, e.g. how God is showing me recently the past week that I must not be afraid to speak the truth in love, and some miracles and testimonies of His wonderful providence. But think shall share more next time, if we can meet up face to face. :)
Think it's a spiritual season of summer now... activities are starting to buzz up, and I'm feeling excited about the many things that are to be done. But hee, I know there'll come a time soon when I start feeling mellow and moody. Oh well, it'll be my spiritual "autumn", and after that, the winter... and then, spring again! :D Praise Him every season of the soul!
Praise You in the morning
Praise You in the evening
Praise You when I'm young and when I'm old
Praise You when I'm laughing
Praise You when I'm grieving
Praise You every season of the soul
If we could see how much You're worth
Your power, Your might, Your endless love
Then surely we would never cease to praise You...
No comments:
Post a Comment