Tired, but thinking. :) Two things to jot down:

- the encouragement from God, that I need so much. Told Him I was feeling really really inadequate. Yet somehow have this unusually strong drive in me since the MACHO turbo stayover, to share and cast the uni vision to the younger bros and sisters as much as I can before i leave for the Adults ministry. Spurred on by robert's very timely lunch - which he initiated - on the very first day of the school sem.

so back to inadequacy. feel very very inadequate, Lord... esp when i'm like teaching them so many things and trying to impart spirit... i recognise my shortcomings and failings, including character failings... and i feel super unworthy to be Your servant... i'm only a member leh, and some of the younger bros and sisters are coreteam already...

yet i think while I was praying to You, You showed me Jeremiah 1 where jeremiah said to You, "Ah, Sovereign Lord, I don't know how to speak. I'm only a child."

And You told me thru that passage, "Don't say you're only a child. See, I have put my words in your mouth..."

But the LORD said to me, "Do not say, 'I am only a child.' You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you... Then the LORD reached out his hand and touched my mouth and said to me, "Now, I have put my words in your mouth... See, today I appoint you over nations and kingdoms to uproot and tear down, to destroy and overthrow, to build and to plant."

Think need to accept this passage from God's word by faith, because i really know that i'm not a good servant of God... yet felt very encouraged... need to stay close to God, to walk right with Him... hmm... think this last 3 weeks is gonna be a rush all the way to the end... just like how You empowered Elijah to outrun Ahab's chariot down the mountain slope...

and after tat, Elijah had a big-time depression. hmm. i think that i may face that too. but i have prayed to You for rest too, after i move over. MM training, encouraging, imparting, followingup... just doing whatever i can do to rally and inspire and stir up the troops, esp the brothers...

Oh God, be with me to the very end. Be with US to the very end. In Jesus' name, amen.

and guide me too... always.

- then something v small but precious that i learnt from a dear friend yesterday at HQ. saw her very tired and obviously stressed and emotional. she was writing a prayer on her notepad. realised that tho we've v similar personalities and she's v emotional and insecure by nature, something that she has that i need to learn from is a lot of inner strength, and that comes from her heart of faithful prayer, pouring out to God, even when she finds it hard to say out, using pen and paper. truly very inspired by this dear sister's example. can see how her heart grows and is full of love for others bcos she prays and prays constantly. very inspired by her heart for God! :D

sis, if you're reading this... just to say that you're being an inspiration to us, especially when you're feeling tired and down. :) for His power's made perfect in our weaknesses.