Was putting on my socks, before going out of the house to attend How Joo's and Sijia's wedding. Then a thought struck me. How would I feel when I see them get married?

Strangely, I don't feel much anxiety now regarding marriage. Quite different from last time. I feel quite happy, ambivalent even, about the idea of marriage... and I find that God is helping me increase in my heart's desire to do His will in what He has called me to do.

Of course, there is a desire in my heart for a soulmate, as so often it comes. But the strangely wonderful thing is that it's no longer so strong in my heart now... in a way, there is now a Greater Passion in my heart.

An increasingly consuming fire in my heart to be totally and absolutely His.

So was wondering why the change in my heart.

And I think it's because my heart really has found the One whom it was made for. Jesus really is my Beloved, and I am His; His banner over me is love.

=) Sweetly contented, even in the midst of my natural dissatisfaction. So praise the Lord, the supernatural joy of heaven once again overwhelms, overrules and overrides the natural happinesses of my heart. =D

And yeah, thank God, as I pray to Him regarding this desire of the heart, I find that His Word and Spirit have been transforming my inmost values and attitudes. =) It's so exciting. If I do get married, I so want it to extend the Kingdom of God. For this marriage to be an instrument, a vehicle, through which my future wife and I can do great and mighty exploits for the Lord Jesus Christ. "As for me and my household, we will serve the Lord."

Yeah! Thank God for wonderful couples like Howjoo and Sijia! =D

In any case, what a joy it is to be a happy single. Haha!

And it's funny how my perspective on life's circumstances has been changed the past week on joy. It seems to have something to do with the fact I'm doing a systematic study of the book of Philippians. WHOA. AWESOME.

Yeah! It's so exciting to see how in every circumstance, the gospel somehow is able to be preached. Whether in chains or in freedom, we are able to preach Christ with our lives, with our hearts, and especially with our joy. :D That people may know that Jesus is the Son of God, and the one whom God sent to save us from our sins. Aye-men!

And I so want to preach the gospel to more children too. =) Slowly, and steadily. Constantly demonstrating a life transformed by the gospel, so that my dear children can see that Christ really is real, and He changes lives!

Yup! Looking forward to being more and more surrendered to God. =D