A Ramly Burger

Hmm. Quite frustrated by an auntie just now at the Ramly Burger stall. Ordered a special burger, then found out that got cheese, so 50 cents more. Told her i didn't order the cheese, so she was ok about that and said sorry.

But got quite frustrated, bcos i told her that i wanted special burger, and _seems to me_ that she assumed that she can add cheese.

So, started feeling quite pissed off, and when she took a while to answer a phone call, and handle money with her gloved hand (hygiene!!!), I started becoming very critical of her and considered going to another stall to spite her.

But think God reminded me to understand her, put myself in her shoes - i mean, it was probably a genuine mistake.

Then when she handed me the burger, i realised that i didn't get back 50 cents change from her (from what I remembered). So asked her about it. She was confused, and I was getting quite upset with her.

Decided not to get into an argument, esp since there were others waiting for their burgers, and walked away, telling her it's ok. But I distinctly remember my facial expression saying the oppositie - very unhappy.

Think she was quite affected by what I did.

Realise that i'm responding in the same way as my mum... and wonder if it's the best way, since these confrontations at a stall in a public place really isn't pleasant.

So now I'm here, typing and thinking about this. Think I'm becoming increasingly rude... and I'm afraid of that. Esp if you become a Christian, and people tell you that you are becoming increasingly rude, proud, etc... that's a shocking realization, esp since the life of a Christian is meant to shine brighter and brighter, sweeter and sweeter, not the other way around.

Or could it be that God is purposely putting me through all these experiences to bring out the real side of me, to let me see for myself the darkness in my heart, so that He can bring this to my attention?

Even though it's not wrong to clarify and even insist on getting your change back - esp if it's a genuine wrong, i think i should approach this in the right spirit - with the spirit of gentleness and patience and respect. Because God doesn't look at the actions so much as He looks at the heart attitude. I could ignore the missing change and walk away, but despise and put the person down in my heart, spreading bad words about the auntie and her stall. Or I could do the opposite, clarifying with her gently, and being GOOD-spirited about it... giving her the benefit of the doubt - perhaps it was an honest mistake... and in the end, the conflict would bring us closer together, and make this a sweeter experience.

Humility... how I need it again. I need it everyday, like a beggar needs his daily scraps to live each day.