Today

CG today was about friendships. The 9 Ts of friendships. Shall put it up soon. Reminded again about need for transparency.

Then after that, talked with HQ along the way. Shared with him about my melancholy and disappointment. HQ encouraged me with this word: "Persist!" He also went through the same discouragements as me before. :) Very encouraged by his words. About changing. Changing - we make the decision, but God gives us the strength.

There are times we want to change, but we forget that ultimately it is God who must provide us with the means to change.

And there are times we are not willing to change. That's when we need a good godly scolding to whack us upside-down.

As HQ mentioned, (to paraphrase him - sorry if I remembered wrongly) it's good if there are areas that are beyond ourselves to change. That's where God can really show His power to change us.

Ultimately it's about our decision to change and it's about God's strength to change us. That's where it all lies. The decision to change, the willingness, the desire. God looks at my heart, whether I want to change or not. And even though the change may take years, He will give me the strength to change.

"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation - the old has gone, the new has come!"

I was very encouraged by Calyn's sharing with me at HQ on Thursday about how she sees how God has been changing her in various ways. :)

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After that, Shawn and I talked over the phone. Very funny... both of us have been feeling melancholic for the past week. :) So it was a good time of sharing.

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Argh. My dad asked me to go all the way down to the 4th level of the carpark to fetch something for him. Felt very unwilling to do so - I scowled - but I know that Jesus would have me be a servant. Gee. Thinking now about it... but anyway initially I said no, but decided to go anyway since it's a good thing to do.

So prayed to God to give me the strength to go up and help my dad pick up his stuff, even though I felt very unwilling. Obedience... dying to my sinful nature. And it was a tiring journey. I think... He helped me put a little more of my selfish nature to death that night. Still, there's a lot more of the sinful me to put to death, that Christ may live in more of me.

And I realised how that blessed my dad... and I also saw the groceries that he had carried all the way from the carpark to home. And I realised that my dad hadn't asked me to help him carry all those heavy bags back home.

Then I realised...

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I think it's pruning time for me. Prune away my selfish nature, prune away my pride, prune away my impatience... so that I can bear more of the fruit of the Spirit. "...patience, kindness, goodness... faithfulness, gentleness and self-control."

There are three levels of the fruit of the Spirit. From the context of the letter to the Galatians Christians, in which this verse is found, I think Paul was talking about relationships between Christians.

And I observed that the situations in which the 9 parts of the fruit of the Spirit become increasingly harder.

"Love, joy, peace..."
Love one another - and that means really loving others as yourself, even those who are nice to you. Joy even when you feel sad with others. Peace, when you feel like arguing.

"...patience, kindness, goodness..."
Patience, when people start stepping on your toes and getting onto your nerves
Kindness, even to those who behave rudely towards you.
To respond with goodness, even when people are bad to you.

"Faithfulness, gentleness and self-control..."
When you really feel like giving up on the other person, faithfulness calls for persistence and staying true to the other one.
Gentleness goes even higher... even when you are treated harshly, you respond with a gentle spirit. (I find that very hard to do, to respond in a gentle spirit. So I have a long way to grow in this area.)

And self-control? :) Let's just say that the other guy gets to live another day. :P

Hee. Just some thoughts. Correct me if I'm wrong.