Days of Transition

It's been a difficult time. Robert and I met up on Saturday at Bishan for brunch, and were moaning about work life. :)

And was moaning to Huaqiang over the phone before going for FOP. He told me that the struggles I'm going through - e.g. feeling that I can't fit into the new culture... - are normal. It'll probably take me 6 months of working life before I adapt comfortably. He had his own transition experience too. Just that it was easier for him because he was still in the tertiary group when he made his crossing-over.

So nice haha. I feel like I'm traversing a bullet-strewn beach with full battle-pack a la D-Day.

Oh dear. Am very easily irritated at the moment. Especially when my dad tries to show concern for me. Because I don't want him to treat me as a "little boy" anymore. (Hard for him to do, I guess, when it's been so many years.) Transition, transition. God, have mercy on me...

During FOP, shared with Jiaxiang that Psalm 23 tells us that when we are walking through the valley of the shadow of death, we will fear no evil, because Jesus is with us. We experience his presence more strongly when we are going through the down times. Somehow it encouraged Jiaxiang. And when I shared that, tears started coming to my eyes as I shared it with him, because I realised that God really was with me through it all.

And initiative, initiative! HQ was telling me that I have to take initiative. Often I don't want to take initiative, because I'd rather have others 'spoonfeed' me... it's so much more comfortable. But Christ's good words goad me: "For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve..."

One thing that HQ exhorted me was, even if others don't want or believe in the vision, what does that matter to me? Just go ahead and do it!

Felt ... mixed feelings about this. But during FOP, God ministered to me, reminding me that "surely I am with you always, even to the very end of the age." :) So there's this heavy burden in my heart, and this divine goading to do what is good and right in His eyes.

So here we go - I am still young, and I may not know much, but God spoke to me... in fact, He has been prodding me a lot in the past 1.5 months. So Here We Go! Though none may follow, yet will I go...