"Mine eyes turned away from me, and mine eyes turned towards Thee"

Thank You again, Daddy! :D So encouraged... (i always write that word... but well... that's exactly my feeling here... hahaha)

Was praying, and one thing that really disheartedned me was how quiet God seems. I heard that He's always longing to speak to us, but we don't take time to hear...

And I think back to the times that I know that He's REALLY spoken to me, loud and clear... and they are few in numbers.

And I asked God, "Why, Lord? Why do You so choose to speak in a whisper? Why? You know that I really can't stand people speaking in a whisper... and I really want to hear You speak LOUD and CLEAR!"

And I was so frustrated, just sitting there, facing the corner... until I ran out of words to say. Somehow I know that He was there, just listening, and remaining silent. Then this verse came to mind: "Be still, and know that I am God."

And this thought came to my mind: "My child... you have SO many things on your mind... no wonder you can't hear Me. Too many things cluttered in your mind.

My child, leave all your worries and burden and doubts at the foot of the cross, where I died for you. And just remain in My presence. Leave all your cares and concerns at the foot of the cross, and come to Me.

Come to Me, and I will show you great and unsearchable things you do not know. Come to Me, and I will tell you what you need to hear. Come to Me, and I will guide you in the path that I want you to take. Come to Me."

Wah lau... His Spirit really spoke to my spirit deep within... He knows that I've been so busy and burdened... and He loves me so. He STILL loves me, He HAS always loved me, and He ALWAYS loves me. His love NEVER fails.

*******
Somehow... I know that it's not about myself. When I asked Jesus for a specific word of encouragement or just something to speak to me, I looked around, wondering if there's any thing special or what... and I saw this Bible passage that I pinned on my shelf.

"If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself, take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it and whoever loses his life for Me will find it."

At first, this verse, well, was just a bunch of words. But I know that it's JESUS' very own words... so I thot, why not take a look at this verse and THINK about it? So I did... and thank God! :D this verse spoke to me after all!

Somehow I think He's impressing on my heart that I'm too preoccupied with myself, with my own struggles and my own worries and concerns... So why not just "heck care lah", throw my worries to the wind and think about JESUS' concerns instead?

It's not about my own holiness - it's about being in HIS holiness...
It's not about my own future - it's about HIS plans for this generation.
It's not even about my own life - it's about HIS heartbeat for ALL our lives.

So encouraged! And not just that again... God confirmed the thought that I had was true... He confirmed it through something that Wenjiang mentioned during today's Alpha sharing, through the Bible passage that I pinned on my wall... and the following passage from Crosswalk.com by Max Lucado:

Now witness God’s response. Does he remove them? Eliminate the burdens? No, rather than take them, he offsets them. He places an eternal weight of glory on the other side. Endless joy. Measureless peace. An eternity of him. Watch what happens as he sets eternity on your scale.

Everything changes! The burdens lift. The heavy becomes light when weighed against eternity. If life is “just a moment,” can’t we endure any challenge for a moment?

We can be sick for just a moment.

We can be lonely for just a moment.

We can be persecuted for just a moment.

We can struggle for just a moment.

Can’t we?

Can’t we wait for our peace? It’s not about us anyway. And it’s certainly not about now.

******
Now, on to happier things!

Wilson's testimony at Alpha!!! Hallelujah!
So encouraged! First convert to Christ for Alpha, now first witness for Christ!
Praise God!!! It's SUCH A JOY!!!

Sing hallelujah, sing hallelujah!
Sing hallelujah to Jesus our King!
Sing hallelujah, sing hallelujah!
Sing hallelujah, He's done a great thing!

And a new brother in my CG tonight!
Praise God!!! So thankful! *does a little jig*

Ok, now on to more sober things.
What Hongtao and Yufen shared, it's impt for him to grow in a stronger and deeper understanding of God.

Think also gotta show him Christ's realness and love - for God's more than an intellectual concept - He's a Person... as real - more real than this reality, actually! - as you and me... so pray that my CG will really LURRRRRRVE this bro - all the more that he's now a child of God. "Let us do good to all ppl, especially to the family of believers."

*******
Jesus! There's simply no one like Him, who went around healing people, thinking about them, having compassion on them, feeding them, discipling them... and He sent His Spirit down unto us, that we may continue the great work that He's already started! And He's together with us, fighting in the trenches, fighting in the fields, fighting on the ground, fighting in the streets and in the hills! And He will never fail! "Everyone who trust in Him will never be disappointed."

Comment on " Singapore needs to loosen up, technologically"

Read this article by Tan Hui Leng on Channelnewsasia.com...

Singapore may be keen to develop computer games and animated movies on its shores but frankly, the country is too tame for the typical digital media worker — this according to a man who should know.

Its strait-laced image could stand in the way of the Republic becoming an interactive and digital media hub, said Mr Peter Schwartz (picture), co-founder and chairman of the Global Business Network.

"The game development culture is a culture that is rather loose and wild, and Hollywood is the same," said Mr Schwartz, who was in town as a member of the Research, Innovation and Enterprise Council to discuss research and development proposals in strategic areas identified by Singapore.

He added: "If you are going to be in the business of developing entertainment media, you are going to have to deal with a fairly scruffy type of person. Singapore is not too good at dealing with scruffy people; you don't like people like that much around here.

"One of the challenges is: Are you going to be sufficiently tolerant of the kinds of creative people in these industries that often emerge in very creative societies?"...

I was thinking about this... think somehow there's this implicit idea being conveyed through this article that "bohemian types of people automatically equals extra-creative types". Creative as in the media sense.

"The game development culture is a culture that is rather loose and wild, and Hollywood is the same" ...
But to ask a question here: Is it really necessary to have a "rather loose and wild" culture in order to encourage creativity here? Creativity in the media arts and the like?

No, think the real issue here is whether we have a culture that encourages entrepreneurial-style experimentation and exploration. It doesn't matter whether you smoke pot or not - I mean, c'mon, marijuana does damage to your brain - even Ozzie Osbourne, the famous metal-rocker, has spoken out against drugs, showing people just how fried his brain has been due to drugs...

Think what Mr Schwartz, a member of Singapore's Research, Innovation and Enterprise Council, said at the end of the article is really the key to helping boost Singapore's creative industries then... he also said that Singapore is too obsessed with success to create an atmosphere conducive to experimentation and exploration.

Therefore, if we really want to see a boom in developing creative talents, the following must be done:

1. Identify the strengths and talents of each and every individual.
I think this is where the old primary school streaming system, frankly, is inadequate. It does aim to help cater to different people's specific needs - but I think it may be approaching this attempt the wrong way. Instead of trying to conform people to an external academic standard, why not see where the strengths and talents of each person lies, and develop that particular talent? One could compare it to prospecting for various resources in various mines... mining for talent, if you would call it. One looks for iron, another looks for gold, and yet another looks for oil. All very different, but all very important in their own God-given ways.

Think much encouraging progress has already been made in this area, and Singapore is advancing well in this area e.g. the Singapore Sports School, the setting up of the National Youth Council and other areas.

2. Then secondly, think the next step is to grow and develop a culture where people are not condemning, but rather, accepting of failures, and encouraging one another to stand up again and try again from another angle. This is where our country has yet to grow in this area - we, right now, are quite a "bo-chup" group of people. I know, I'm one of them too. :)

3. Then thirdly, the most important step is to reproduce talent. By reproducing talent, I don't mean physical reproduction! I mean, it isn't enough to merely develop our own talents to the maximum - we MUST pass it on and multiply our talents to others who are interested to learn more. In this way we can lay up a strong foundation for future budding media developers and designers. (I think this isn't a new fad - old Chinese gongfu masters have been doing this for ages... haha...)

So, in conclusion, the key to developing a strong and thriving creative media industry in Singapore lies NOT in having "a culture that is rather loose and wild", but rather, growing and developing a culture that is supportive and encouraging people to experiment and explore (within safe boundaries) their inner muses. And the call, for us Christians, is especially critical, when you consider the increasing numbers of young people who are playing computer games to interact with one another... the onus is on us to be salt and light in the media industry.

What Peter told me during shepping today

• There are times when we come to God with a lot of things on our minds. We're very tired and just rattle off a list of requests. And when we read the Bible, we expect to receive something groundshaking. But maybe that's not the most important thing at that time. Maybe God just wants us to sit down and simply enjoy His Word. To "[b]e still and know that I am God."
• "Live with your weaknesses. But I'm saying this not in a negative spirit, but in a positive way - live with the hope that you will not remain the same forever."
  
• Constantly cultivate a spirit of thanksgiving. 1 Thess 5:16. Because I tend to be very melancholic, esp when tired.
  

*******

A dear friend told me today, "I'm so glad to see you," and sweetly smiled. It's such a small thing, but it's something that I really treasure - warms my heart a lot. :)

No, it's not what you think it probably is... *smile* And if I told you who the person was, you'd definitely know that it's not the sweetheart type. Hahaha... but seriously, thank God for these small but sweet gifts of friendship - these are "the dust of gold, panned from memory's streams."

Make a Stand, but Make it a Win-Win Stand!

Was on the MRT back with Bowen and Yufen. We talked abt piracy and what's our response to that. I gave my opinion on it, and Yufen shared, "God sees our hearts." Quite a few things here and there, we shared.

After that, Bo and I chatted some more. He shared with me about what his shepherd had shared with him regarding taking a stand in difficult, "gray-area" situations... e.g. (to paraphrase Bo) what if your whole army platoon want to go to a sleazy bar, especially the higher-ranking ones? A few Christians just went with the rest of the group, but Bo decided to take an absolute stand, saying, "No." But it was very difficult for him, because the rest of the group were definitely very unhappy.

So Bo asked his shepherd for advice. In a nutshell, Jason said, "Take a stand, and make it a win-win situation."

I thought about this, and it's really an excellent piece of advice. Because when I enter the working world, it's really a dog-eat-dog world out there... Jesus said, "I am sending you out like sheep among wolves." I've experienced a bit of it during Army times, and I also didn't know what to do, so I just made an absolute stand. But that didn't really endear me to my colleagues, so in a way, I wasn't able to impact their lives or make closer friends as well as I could have.

*******

"Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves." Wisdom. I really lack it. And I really need it - lots of it. As I walked back home from the MRT, I thought about this, and what Peter shared with me last week about media. This struck me - just how many of the most popular blogs are written by Christians? And how many of the best movies in history have been made by Christians? And about comics - how many of them?

I was thinking about the humour section in Crosswalk.com. Sorry lah, but to be honest, I think the comics there are ... just not funny. Really. So bland. And the comics that I really really love to read - they're definitely hilarious - e.g. Liberty Meadows, Monty, Sherman...

Then thought about the blogs... oh man, Xiaxue and Rockson... Rockson's one is damn hilarious one... and super-vulgar! And thought about our own blogs... my own blog, and what one of my good friends said about it - he doesn't like to read the contents - but he reads it simply because he's my friend. Yeah, he's not a Christian.

Ok, here's a lot of points, but I think the real question really is, when you take a sober look
at it, just how much impact are we Christians making in this society? In this city? On this planet? Different people have different level of impact, to be sure, but even within our own circles, are we shining?

Jesus said that we are the salt of the earth. It's a cliched statement, to be sure - but if you read it in a contemporary context, to describe a group of people as "hey! they're the salt of the earth", it somehow conjures up the imagination of a refreshing and fun group of people - the type of people that you'd really enjoy hanging out with - Christian or not.

Thought about it - being salt means that we are flavour-enhancers. I tried cooking some sausages without some salt. It was ... bland. Heh. But after that, I rubbed in some salt. Wow... it was delicious! The sausage... just tasted more sausage-y!

*******
So I'm thinking about the point on wisdom. Somehow, I'm realising, in addition to my life lacking depth, I also realise that my life really lacks wisdom. Think it was a few Divine whispers here and there... small snippets of Bible verses that came into my mind throughout the day... and I feel more and more convicted of my need to grow in wisdom.

Wisdom. It's so important... wisdom doesn't just only apply to living a right life spiritually - it also applies to my dress sense (which I'm getting terribly convicted about), the way my room is packed, the way I treat my body (going without regular sleep does weird things to my mind AND body), the way I can't squeeze the most out of my time...

The way that I relate to other people (social wisdom), the way that I plan for my future work (practical wisdom), the way that I make sense of ongoing global events...

Wisdom is so important - I mean, when God puts an entire book devoted to wisdom in His Word, I think it's definitely worth taking a look at. Wisdom transforms your facial appearance (really - it does!), wisdom transform your thinking, wisdom makes you powerful and attractive, wisdom makes you grow in depth of relationships, wisdom makes you influential and able to impact others for good purposes... and best of all, wisdom helps you share the Gospel with more and more people. "The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life, and he who wins soul is wise."

So if I want to be a shepherd, I really need to grow in wisdom. I'm struck by the various aspects of wisdom that I see in various people, e.g. Jits for the way that she can really squeeze time, Eric for his managerial skills and stewardship, Peter for the social skills that he taught me, Shirley for her wisdom in her work life, my mum for her shrewdness (yes, it CAN BE a good thing)...

*****

I was feeling really burdened, and I decided to turn to the book of Proverbs. Proverbs 30:2-3 jumped out at me: "

2 "I am the most ignorant of men;
I do not have a man's understanding.

3 I have not learned wisdom,
nor have I knowledge of the Holy One."

So something I know that the road to starting to grow in wisdom begins with admitting that, "God, You were right all along - I really know nuts. So please teach me today..." And God smiles and says, "I will. I was waiting for you all along to ask me. Ask, and you shall receive!"

In other words, humbly getting down on my knees and depending on Jesus to give the wisdom that I so lack. Really praying to grow in wisdom starting from today. Lord, I know nuts... but You know EVERYTHING. So ... teach me, Daddy! :) In Jesus' name, AMEN!

Came back from Alpha Camp '06

Whee! :D Thank God, it was a WONDERFUL TIME!!! Hahaha... and we got 2 new brothers... in one nite!!! Praise God indeed! I'm reminded... it's Jesus who saves!!!

And last nite we had a new sister... Yanting!!! When I asked her how she felt, she grinned and said, "I'm very happy!" And when I asked her what made her want to ask Jesus into her life, she replied, "All my questions have been answered... and I decided to take a leap of faith."

Also, one of the brothers (John), when Benaiah asked him the same question, replied, "Before I met you guys, I found other Christians pushy... but you guys are different... I can see that God really is real..."

Sweet! :D Jesus is so wonderful... :D :D :D

And I told Jan n Mich abt Yanting coming to know Christ... they were amazed and said, "ReaLLy??? Because we were praying for her just now!" And Jan said, "We were upstairs praying... I heard some clapping just now. Now I know what it was for..."

Wow... praise God indeed! :D

Haha... and also thank God for the MM... haha... it was tough work... but praise God again, it's always so sweet to be able to serve Jesus... have learnt quite a few things, and experienced deeper fellowship with those I'm serving... esp Shunrong, one of the bros from NTU... very inspired by his humility and sweet serving spirit... something that I really want to capture from this brother. Also Eric, for his meticulous management and excellent stewardship... he's really one of the most detailed and faithful stewards I've met... have also learnt a lot from this brother, really learnt a lot from him too.

Yeah, fantastic time of fellowship.... and I want to write more abt the impromptu, spontaneous praise n worship time that some of us had (special thanks to Dom's excellent saxophone n his sax-y voice... LOL...;))... we were dancing... singing... jumping... God! it's so REAL... really could sense Your joy filling the place... really really really really really really really so sweet... thank God also for Qiaoping's piano playing... haha... wow... so many wonderful memories... so grateful to God for His blessing me with such a sweet n wonderful experience for my last ever matriculation camp... esp since I'll be moving on after graduation...

"Many are the wonders You have done for us, O LORD... were I to count them, they would be too many to tell!"

---

So many wonders... so many joys... so many sweet times... i was pondering during worship time, thinking abt wat my life wld have been if i hadn't asked Jesus into my life... wonder where'd I be at the age of 25 without Jesus...

and... really... my life would juz be rotten, so deprived... probably i'd be spending the whole holidays in front of the computer... just isolating myself from other people... being stuck in my own self-absorbed little world... and never experiencing the real joy of fellowship... with God and with people...

This line by W.H. Davies came into my mind...
"A poor life, this, if full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare."

Think it's juz being able to, at those special moments, just stand back and be amazed at what God is doing in history at this very moment in time... He is building up the Golden City... bringing more and more of us lost souls to know Him... to "stand before [Him] in wide-opened wonder, amazed at the glory of [Him]..."

And this power of heaven... is so real... coming down to bring joy and peace into the heart of every one who will ask Him into his/her life... to take that leap of faith...

Oh man... what would life be without Jesus? it'll be hell... really... there is nothing so devastating than to be without God, without a Saviour...

But, back to now... this present moment... and hey, I REALLY am living life to the full... :D really... not that He stuffs our days with extraordinary things to do (not always lah)... but rather, that He makes the ordinary into the extraordinary...

like when you were deaf your whole life, and suddenly you heard music for the first time...

like when you were blind your whole life, and suddenly you were able to see every colour, every hue and shade...

just some thoughts here. :) praying that these thots, You'll like, Daddy. :)

Open the eyes of my heart....

Hey God, just thot i'd write u something...

not sure hw to put it into words yeah.

But i just having this conviction that my life lacks depth.

I know that You're good in all Your ways, God...
I know that all Your thots twd me are lovely n full of grace...

God, I not sure where i'm going. But please hold me hands yeah? :)

---

Am thinking abt wat Peter shared wif me during shepherding. Some points that he told me:
- Values that are based on the Bible = sound thinking
- "Think abt it... how many Christian scriptwriters are there in the movie industry?"
- "I remember Ps Jeff joked during today's service that 'If you don't like a movie's script, then make your own!'"
- "Media shapes our values."
- Affluence and influence...
- Salt n light
- thinking from the bigger picture.

In a nutshell, wat he shared wif me was abt media... more than that, not being Christians who sit in our own little islands - "我跟耶稣在椰子下..."
but being globally aware... AND having the desire to make an impact for God... not bcos we want to make a name for ourselves... but bcos GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD...

Bcos Jesus Himself said clearly that we are called to be SALT n LIGHT... to impact AND influence others... to be godly preservatives n flavour-enhancers in a world that's so often decaying... not just spiritually, but also mentally... physically... even aesthetically (you ever see the quality of some of today's "artwork"/"media"? just ... dumb or worse...)... So we can make a refreshing difference... e.g. make top-class movies that touch the hearts of pple... movies tt actually show the power of Godly values in action, not just (e.g. grace - Forrest Gump, redemption - the Shawshank Redemption, courage - Saving PRivate Ryan, convictions - Chariots of Fire, integrity - A Few Good Men, commitment to duty - Spiderman 2... and the list goes on...)

PEter also added, even something as simple as a blog to influence n bless others... that's y some brothers n sisters' blogs refresh me a lot.... e.g. Weizhu's blog...

So how do I get started? Can start talking with God abt the daily news that I see... talk with Him abt the movies that I've watched... ask His opinions... learn from Him what He says, both thru His word and thru other ppl/special circumstances, etc.

And it's not abt doing what we think is right... i mean, the old adage "The road to hell is paved with good intentions..." is so true... e.g. the Nazis' intention to create a master race led to genocide... you get the idea... so it's really critical, if we want to live a life of purpose and drive, must know WHERE to go... like a surgeon who must know WHERE to cut... or he/she'll do worse damage than if never did at all...

Yup just to pen down some thots. Praying that this'll be the start of a deeper life.

"When my spirit grows faint within me,
it is You who know my way..."

I will praise His name even when I fall, for His nails said it all.

__,.-`'*·dom™ ♪ said:
well, if He doesn't let u stay, He's got something better
[✖]Band of Brothers[✖] I will trust His heart... I will trust His heart... even thru the darkest nite, I will trust His heart... said:
thanks bro!
[✖]Band of Brothers[✖] I will trust His heart... I will trust His heart... even thru the darkest nite, I will trust His heart... said:
yah think He reminded me abt "in all things He works for the good of those who love Him..."
__,.-`'*·dom™ ♪ says:
yea, He WORKS even tho He's way past retirement age. for the good of us who love Him.
Alleluia^^
__,.-`'*·dom™ ♪ says:
k, juz being lame abt the retirement bit, but seriously, let that verse be the light that shines on the dirt track u're walking down now
__,.-`'*·dom™ ♪ says:
our destiny is secure already, so we seriously hav got nothing to worry about.
__,.-`'*·dom™ ♪ says:
it's natural to feel distressed or even feel like u wana cry. but look beyond the mountains of yout troubles, bro. for NOTHING.. no friggin thing can take away the good He's done for us. no friggin thing can separate us from His love.
__,.-`'*·dom™ ♪ says:
His nails said it all
[✖]Band of Brothers[✖] I will trust His heart... I will trust His heart... even thru the darkest nite, I will trust His heart... says:
thanks.... bro. :) really.
__,.-`'*·dom™ ♪ says:
=)

Thank God!!! So blessed!!!

Just really want to thank my Daddy in heaven for blessing me so sweetly...

1. After helping my ma wif some stuff today, she told me, "Thanks Yeu Ann, you are REALLY a great help to me!" Wow... super-touched... and so glad that I can be a good testimony at home, not just in school or the workplace... really want to be a good son, even as i serve Jesus in church ministry... because I know it brings a BIG smile to my Daddy's heart!

2. Praise God for His abundant provisions!!! Was really trying very hard to locate additional laptops, DOTA games (i really don't want to pirate any Warcraft software), harddisks and cameras... then somehow the Holy Spirit prompted me to ask Kim Chun (at 230 am liao... ok, well, that's not so difficult haha ;)) for help... and Yufen prayed for the MM team to be able to source wat we need for the filming...

Kim Chun got almost everything we need... cameras, tripods, and most imptly DOTA! And he's free to help the Alpha MM team the WHOLE day tml... praise God for this bro! very very very encouraged to see how God can work and provide through ppl in so many ways... most of all, v encouraged by his willing spirit to come down n help us... it just blesses my heart so... :) and he's helping dabao lunch for us too! haha...

ok, well, we DO have to pay him for the lunch haha...

Praise God! from whom all blessings flow!
Praise Him! all ye creatures here below...
Praise Him! all ye heavenly hosts above...
Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost! aMEN!

I gotta tidy up my room...

Was looking at my room. Somehow I keep getting the feeling that I HAVE to start cleaning it up... when even I start finding it messy... well, you get the idea.

Ha... I was commenting to God just now that, "Hey, it's not messy! It's *ahem* personalized."

And 1 Cor 14:33 came to mind: "For God isn't a God of disorder but of peace."

Oh Boy. God sure has a Very Interesting sense of humour. Because my room looks like a battlefield. Get the joke?

Argh... I HAVE to get started.

Don't let your heart get side-tracked by less impt issues... keep your eyes focused on the main task, the one that Jesus gave you to do. And do it!

Touched :)

Had just woke up, groggy after World Cup - arrrhh!! Brazil lost!!! So sad... :(

But tk God for the time of fellowship... yeah!

Lots of worries when I woke up today - my worries love to rush me in the morning...

Didn't feel very prayerful, just wanted to sleep bcos I was sick. Just Sick. And Very Exhausted after so many days.

But I'm always so touched by His love - even when He doesn't seem to be very loving, yet I've learnt that His love is more real than my imagination. :)

Told Jesus that I'm sick, really dunno what to pray, etc. Told Him I got lots of things on my mind. Just grumpy, etc. etc.

Then my ma asked me to do an errand, to check out a website.

Then I happened to see this link:
"What I Have Learned From Martha:

[Doing] good is not enough, we must do what is best.
Jesus told Martha that she worries about many things, but that Mary had chosen what was better and that it could not be taken from her. God must come first in all things. We must be willing to sit at his feet each day to get direction so that we know what is best versus what is just good. And when we sit at his feet, what we learn can not be taken from us.

Then I saw this verse. It really spoke to my exact heart condition:

"Martha, Martha," the Lord answered, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."
— Luke 10:41-42

Touched!

The rest of the article also spoke to me. I'm just very... touched. That He would notice even the tiniest things of my heart. I know He knows, yes... but still it just never fails to warm my heart every time Jesus sends a small word of encouragement every day my way.

I mustn't dwell anymore on this tiredness that I'm feeling. Like what Weizhu told me, "If you keep on thinking you are [tired], you WILL become more and more tired!"

"The eternal God is [my] refuge, and underneath are His everlasting arms." What a joy to be carried by Jesus.

---

Joy... oh, there was a great sermon yesterday on joy. One of the points that struck me was "Excessive reasoning". It can be one of Satan's tools to steal joy from our lives - sometimes we tend to overly complicate the simple joys of life e.g. the company of friends, beautiful weather, a great book, a hug, a smile, a lovely flower... etc. etc. This point applies to me because my mind has a habit of excessively reasoning things here and there. So I need to change this habit, to start thinking about "whatever is true, whatever is noble, ... right, ... pure... lovely... admirable... if anything is excellent or praiseworthy, think abt such things... whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in [my leaders], put it into practice... and the God of peace will be with me."

ameN!

Rainbow Fire in the sky...

Oh my... isn't this beautiful indeed?

This brought to mind the passage in Genesis, where God showed Noah a rainbow after He sent a devastating flood over all the earth, as a guarantee of His promise never to flush the earth again...

I had thought abt this before... didn't the rain stop? Then how come still got rainbow?

Then hey, I see this kind of rainbow... whoa, maybe God showed Noah THIS kind of rainbow... it's incredibly, incredibly beautiful. =)

Just a thought... thank God for His rainbows.

How ongoing Your presence is, O God!

You are powerful, yet gentle; strong yet humble in heart.

You are incredibly thoughtful - when I have no idea and feel stressed out over the daily mundane things and duties that I have to do, You ask me to bring it to You in prayer...

and You invite me to be patient with You...

and then as I wait upon You, You give me a clearer idea of what I need to do... and You show me what to plan for... and how to plan... and how to execute the plans...

and it incredibly touches me so because You, King of all the Universe, would actually bother to step in to help manage my little daily mundane things that I can't even handle...

Father, nothing is too daily or too small or too mundane for You to handle. Father, transform every little act, every little word, every little thought of mine into a sacred thing, forever hallowing Your name... just as You did with the towel and wash-basin that night - a mundane act, now forever hallowed.

---

Am I seeing things with my real eyes or am I seeing them with religious glasses?

---

Super-touched - God spoke yet again to me as I was flipping through "My Utmost for His Highest" - every page I flipped through spoke to what I had been praying to God earlier.

I'm incredibly touched once again. Daddy knows my thoughts from afar.

Excited at God :)

Recently got this reply when I sent an email to the HopeKids ministry team.

Hi Yeu Ann,

Thanks for your interest to partner with us to renew the generation for Christ. I’m delighted to hear of the options we have for you. Currently we need to beef up the multimedia aspect of our HopeKids LIVE! service more than anything. It’s the weekly display of multimedia. Maybe you can drop by one day at our service to check out what’s best for you to be involved ? It can be any Sunday, even this coming one…just let us know.

His,
Hong Teck

Wow, feel very excited... :) Think this is the clearest confirmation yet of God's calling for me in my life. :) I'll be going tomorrow (9 am to 11 am). And whoa, the timing is so fantastic - I just read the HopeKids' blog and found out that there'll be a volunteers' mtg tml at 1.30pm at Europe Room. Hmm... think I'll be going for that too. :)

Excited, and at the same time, quite uncertain abt what's going to happen tml. Wonder what it'll be like... it's my first time there. Back to Sunday School... haha...

Think that's the mystery of God's calling... because it really is something that I wouldn't have even thought of in my wildest dreams. And yet... everything seems to be adding up to this direction.

Think God impressed the word "FAITH" on my heart during worship today during service abt walking with Him. As Abraham obeyed God and went, even though he did not know where he was going, somehow I also feel the same way too. I really know nuts about what's going to happen next... was actually hoping to go to HopeTots haha. But I think God's specific direction for me here is not HopeTots (yet), but HopeKids Live... at this point in time.

And Joyce's (aka Faith) sharing abt her missions trip during dinner... she was mentioning abt kids... and how the Lord really touched the pple, including the kids.

And tml's topic for the service is on "Help To Witness"... whoa. :)

And today's sermon... about God being a BIG-HEARTED FATHER. :)

Whoa. Somehow the circumstanstial evidence here... seems pretty compelling. :) It's not definite evidence, but somehow... well, I dunno, but whereever Jesus calls me to go, I'll go. Anywhere but home. :)

Really exciting. And yet I must remind myself - when Christ calls me to go, I MUST go. No questioning, no doubting, no disobedience, no fear. Amen! :)

Failure: The First Step to Victory

In Touch Daily Devotional
by Dr. Charles Stanley

Sunday June 18, 2006

Failure: The First Step to Victory
Romans 7:15-25

Paul tried to do the right thing, but, like us, sometimes he failed. In his letter to the Romans, Paul seems to agonize over his inability to triumph over sin at every confrontation in his life.

Don’t we all feel like Paul at times? We want to do what’s right, but our actions don’t always represent our true desires.

However, Paul learned that failure shouldn’t be condemning – in fact, it taught him one invaluable lesson: "Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Cor. 12:10).

Here are some things to remember about defeat:

1) Defeat is often engineered by God. God isn’t after self-improvement. He is after death – death to our flesh, which leads to life in Him.

2) Defeat is often essential for God to fulfill His purposes in our lives. When we are broken to the point that the only place we can look is up–and see Him–then we begin to see the purposes and plans He has for our lives.

3) Defeat exposes our weaknesses and inadequacies. Our best efforts never match what God can–and wants–to do in us and through us.

Defeat in our lives doesn’t mean we are defeated. It’s merely God’s way of pointing us to ultimate victory.

---

Am very encouraged again... haha... thank God! :D Yet again it's on the subject of failure... but something with an extra touch... bcos I was thinking and talking to God in my heart yesterday and today abt His plans for my life... and something very sweet that happened today that caused me to reflect on God's sheer goodness to a sinner like me...

This point touched me a lot: "2) Defeat is often essential for God to fulfill His purposes in our lives. When we are broken to the point that the only place we can look is up–and see Him–then we begin to see the purposes and plans He has for our lives."

I was thinking back to my 4 years in NUS, to the time that God really broke my spirit and humbled me... think "crushed" is a more appropriate word. :) Because through that time God really, through a whole series of circumstances and events and what-not, stripped my heart bare, showing me what REALLY was in my heart - so many wicked things, the sheer hypocrisy, the pride, the greed and selfishness that reigned in my heart... and especially the false religious attire that i had put on in front of my brothers n sisters. When He stripped my facade off and showed me what was in my heart, actually i was shocked to see who i really was... and i had a very hard time accepting the sheer ugliness of my character.

But now I'm really grateful to Jesus, my Saviour, because He sent me pple who corrected and rebuked me in love, who helped me turn around and face up to my true inner condition... Hanhui... Weizhu... Peter... Sijia... Shirley... Zewei... and other brothers and sisters who tried to feedback to me. And thank God especially for my shepherds, Weizhu and Peter, who told me to turn back to Jesus... and to put my hope in God for redemption... When I think of all this, I'm reminded of what King Nebuchadnezzar wrote to all the people of the world, "Now I praise and glorify and exalt the God of heaven... for those who walk in pride He is able to humble."

But back to the point... why is this point so meaningful? Think it's because in the past few months, God has been putting a burden and calling in my heart to serve in the children's ministry... somehow I have the feeling that it's much more than a burden... I believe it's a calling from God Himself... and all this started only after I repented and turned back to Jesus for forgiveness last year...

I'm so surprised... because working with children is really totally something i would have never imagined or even dreamt of doing before... because I tend to feel v shy with children, not knowing how to talk or take care of them. But after a series of encounters with children, I've found out that children feel very comfortable with me... and also feedback from Ruey Fong, my dear brother... and also somehow I believe God impressed on my heart that He wanted to give me the name "Abraham"... which means "Father of many nations"... haha...

So I have found myself growing in love and burden for the children of the world... have really desired and been praying to God that He will help mould and shape me to be a good and godly father, not just biologically, but also one who is able to guide and prepare future generations for the dangers and the spiritual battles that lie ahead for each of them.

And something today REALLY touched my heart so much... it makes my heart really jump with joy... today I was at Nexus, when I saw Jits, Clara and Shirley there... as I was chatting with Jits, Shirley suddenly came into my view. She was carrying this super-adorable toddler called Harry. So I asked whether I can also try carrying Harry...

Wah lau, he felt so soft and tender... I couldn't help but think of old Abrahan grinning from ear to ear as he carried his baby son Isaac... and reflected on just how so intensely precious each child is in the eyes of God... as Jesus said, "Let the little children come to Me, and DO NOT HINDER THEM, for the Kingdom of God belongs to such these."

And as I held him there, Harry's eyes looked into my eyes... really magic. Then he stuck out his stubby lil' hand and tried to take off my glasses. haha... not that I mind... i realised how clean babies' hands can be (if they're not sucking on their fingers, that is). :D Really really... intensely sweet. :D How precious each child is, in the eyes of the Father of fathers.

So am amazed at God's wonderful plans and purpose for my life... I was recalling all the talents, strengths, giftings, personality, experiences, desires and baptism name that He has given me... and realised that they are slowly but surely pointing simultaneously in one particular direction... realise the personal vision that He gave me in 2002, just before I entered NUS ministry, is gradually becoming personalised and more real. A dream to fulfill the Great Commission in my lifetime... by building strong and biblical people (including children!) to plant strong and biblical churches in Singapore and all over the world!

And when I think of all these things, I can only stand amazed at His sheer grace... "What is Yeu Ann, that You are mindful of him; the son of man that You care for him?" What is my life, Lord, that You should even bother to have a plan for me in the first place? A plan so uniquely designed... that when I see the unfolding of it in my life, I can only exclaim, "So this is what I am here for!"

Hallelujah!

Just a reflection

"God is not so much interested in whether I complete a task, as He is interested in my attitude in doing it. Everything a Christian does is a spiritual task, whether he/she realises it or not." Hmm...

Also, was feeling quite frustrated and stuck 'cos my sister took over the comp when I was away, and I felt really annoyed. But decided to read my Bible while waiting for her. Then read this verse from Proverbs: "Through patience, a ruler can be persuaded / and a gentle tongue can break a bone."

Whoa, think God gave me a good piece of advice how to get her away from the comp so tt i can resume my work... so just waited patiently next to her, and chatted with her abt what she's doing. Hahaha... thank God, can bless her at the same time, and she also finished doing her web-surfing much faster.

Wow, the Word of God is really wise. :D Still learning more everyday... :D

Frugality

Found this on Crosswalk.com. Very useful! :)
http://crosswalk.com/family/finances/1401010.html

Frugality Opens Doors to Giving, Enjoying God's Blessings
Deborah Smith Pegues
Author

"Now gather the leftovers," Jesus told his disciples, "so that nothing is wasted."

Jesus set a great example for frugality. Even though He had performed a miracle and fed a crowd of 5,000 men and an undisclosed number of women and children with only five loaves and two small fishes, He instructed His disciples to gather up the leftovers. When it was all said and done, they had gathered 12 basketfuls. Now, Jesus, you may wonder, was that necessary? You could have thrown that extra bread away. All you had to do was perform another miracle and make more bread when You needed it. Through His actions, Jesus was showing the importance of not squandering what God has provided—even when it appears that you do not need the excess.

I talked to a couple recently who had lived a rather lavish lifestyle, but through a series of misfortunes lost everything. They are starting to rebuild their lives and are working at jobs that pay much less than they were used to making. I queried them about the role they had played in their financial decline, and they confessed that they were partly responsible. I concluded from a casual observation of their current behavior that a lot of their old wasteful habits were still alive and well. They called it "generosity" when they gave a 95 percent tip to the restaurant’s parking attendant. By no means am I opposed to such bigheartedness, but when you are trying to stabilize your finances, you need to understand that frugality is a significant part of spirituality and God is not pleased when we engage in extravagance.

In one of His parables, Jesus talked about a son who convinced his father to give him his inheritance before the appointed time. "A few days later this younger son packed all his belongings and took a trip to a land, and there he wasted all his money on wild living"(Luke 15:13 NLT). When the economy turned sour, he could only find work feeding a farmer’s swine. He almost starved to death. At one point, he became so hungry he had to eat the pods that the farmer fed to the swine. I can imagine him sitting there by the trough dividing the food between himself and the pigs: "swine," "mine," "swine," "mine." He then realized that his father’s servants were living better than this. He humbled himself and headed home. His merciful father was glad to receive him and gave him a big welcome back party. Of course, by having the party, the father was by no means condoning his son’s wastefulness, but rather celebrating his coming to his senses.

Are you wasteful in any area of your life, or do you actively seek ways to practice frugality? For instance, do you allow your children to open a can of soda, take a few sips, and then trash it? Did you know that there are special lids available at the supermarket that will allow you to seal the can and preserve the fizz? Are you too embarrassed to ask for a doggie bag when you eat out? Do you bring home leftovers from your restaurant dining and then allow them to spoil in the refrigerator before you can consume them? Do you consider reusing plastic lunch bags, especially when you only use them for dry goods such as chips and cookies? They can be recycled at least once after a quick swipe with a damp towel. Do you always turn the lights off when you leave the room? Do you use both sides of the paper when printing drafts of reports—at home and at work?

I have practiced frugality as far back as I can remember. In fact, Darnell teases that I squeeze each dollar so tightly it’s a wonder I don’t rub George Washington’s face right off the front of it. Yes, I turn the bottle upside down and get the last drop out of everything. I pick up every penny I find when I’m out walking. As Benjamin Franklin said, "A penny saved is a penny earned." I use vinegar and water instead of the fancy cleaners to clean glass and shiny surfaces. I do everything I can to save money—not to hoard it, but so that I can share it. I can’t think of a single thing I have ever purchased that has brought more joy than writing a check to someone who desperately needs it. We are never more like Christ than when we are giving.

I want to be careful to balance our discussion by warning that we should not allow our desire to be frugal to keep us from fully enjoying the things that are within the bounds of what God allows. I thoroughly enjoy the breathtaking view of the city from my home. My husband and I have made great sacrifices in putting the needs of God’s house before our own desires. Therefore, we refuse to allow Satan to make us feel guilty about what God has provided.

Frugality is not a call to poverty, and it certainly should not take the fun out of our lives. It is important that we enjoy the abundant life that Christ came to give us. It is equally important to understand that abundance is not to be equated with extravagance. God blesses His children with abundance so that they can bless others with their overflow. If we are all poverty-stricken, how will we have an overflow?

Frugality is simply avoiding waste. Wastefulness will keep your finances in a tailspin. Frugality is evidence that God can trust you with increased resources because you have learned how to manage what He already supplied.

Taken from 30 Days to Taming Your Finances by Deborah Smith Pegues; Copyright 2006 by Deborah Smith Pegues; Published by Harvest House Publishers, Eugene, OR; Used by Permission.

Deborah Smith Pegues is an experienced certified public accountant, a Bible teacher, a speaker, a certified behavioral consultant specializing in understanding personality temperaments, and the author of 30 Days to Taming Your Tongue. She and her husband, Darnell, have been married for more than 27 years and make their home in California.

Talking about golden sunshine...

Talking about golden sunshine... I love the lyrics to this song. :) it's an old song, but hope you guys enjoy it. *nostalgic* Not sure how many pple know the melody... think ppl of my generation and older will know this one. :P *nudges Huanyan* so HY, you gotta learn all the beautiful old songs so tt u can pass it on to the younger ones next time... haha... :D

His love is warmer than the warmest sunshine
Softer than a sigh
His love is deeper than the deepest ocean
Wider than the sky
His love is brighter than the brighest star that
Shines every night above
And there is nothing is this world
That can ever change His love

Once i thought that love was meant
For anyone else but me
Once i thought that no one knew the way
Now that only goes to show
How wrong we all can be
'cause now it seems He loves me more each day

Something happened to my heart
That day that i met Him
Something that i never felt before
And that something is that He has buried all my sins
And everyday i know He loves me more...

He hears the tiniest whisper of my heart

Thank God for His incredible love and goodness and grace to a sinner like me. :)

Ha, because i woke up tis morning, and somehow all sorts of fears and worries and doubts started creeping into my mind. Strangely, it happened after a wonderful night of Bible reading which I think God really ministered to me...

Felt totally pinned down and suppressed - when i'm plagued by fears and worries and doubts, it's very hard for me to get up from bed - yup it's true. So cried out to Jesus to help me from this attack, and somehow i felt this inner prompting to take my Bible and read it.

Opened the book, and hey! praise God! :D my eyes fell on these words:

25"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?

28"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Wow... thank God indeed... He has heard the wordless cries of my voice... and the silent whimpers of my heart. So now am typing this, because really want to thank God for all His goodness to me... to "lift up the cup of salvation / and call on the name of the LORD."

Just also want to share another testimony abt His goodness to me...
Yesterday i was rushing to take a cab down to NUS to meet the multimedia team for Alpha to do some filming. But it was raining, and it was a Sunday, and i was at Junction 8. So that means a long, long crowd waiting for taxis... So I was wondering how to get a cab on time, 'cos i have to pass the tape for filming to the MM team, or else they can't film, and they've been waiting for a very long time. Whispered a very small prayer to God that I really need a cab, but the queue very long, so could He send one along?

Then hey, the moment I stepped out to the main road, a taxi came along, dropping off its passengers. Hey! So flagged down the taxi, and the taxi came and stopped next to me. Wow! :D Thank God... am reminded of His sensitivity and thoughtfulness... that He hears even the tiniest whisper of my heart... Think it's very reassuring, this experience, esp for someone like me who tends to worry whether He has heard my prayers... that even someone like me matters so much to Him... as John Ortberg puts it, a "love beyond reason".

Shall keep in mind what the Bible says about this experience:

"1 I love the LORD, for he heard my voice;
he heard my cry for mercy.

2 Because he turned his ear to me,
I will call on him as long as I live."
Psalm 116

very touched leh... :D think I will paste this psalm down, think it really reflects very meaningfully today's and yesterday's experiences.

And think it's not a coincidence that at this moment, just as i'm typing this entry, the sun's coming in... and He knows that I love golden sunshine. :)

Psalm 116

"1 I love the LORD, for he heard my voice;
he heard my cry for mercy.

2 Because he turned his ear to me,
I will call on him as long as I live.

3 The cords of death entangled me,
the anguish of the grave came upon me;
I was overcome by trouble and sorrow.

4 Then I called on the name of the LORD :
"O LORD, save me!"

5 The LORD is gracious and righteous;
our God is full of compassion.

6 The LORD protects the simplehearted;
when I was in great need, he saved me.

7 Be at rest once more, O my soul,
for the LORD has been good to you."

"To know His ways more..." - a renewed perspective that i got today :)

Hmm... wonder how to start... feel so... intensely touched by what God is doing in my life... it's all about JESUS, really! Life is simply NOT big enough for Him... He is JUST too big for any life, ever! How big His heart! How... i can't express it enuff in words, the way He spoke to me thru so many words, from so many pple, from so many sources... thru His Holy Spirit... thru His Word... thru my brothers n sisters... thru the voice of Reason, the voice of Logic, the voice of many experiences...

His love is too deep to express sufficiently in words... Like the song goes, "There are no words / Good enough to thank You / There are no words to express my praise..."

Perhaps, one could take pause and agree with Wittgenstein in his Tractatus, who said that there are some things that simply cannot be expressed in words... and thus, one should just remind silent.

To just stand and behold the glory of God... just "Lost for words with all to say /
Lord you take my breath away / Still my soul, my soul cries out / For you are holy..."

---

Think I'll just summarise what I've learnt from my reflections on the past few weeks... think God impressed on my heart during worship time today during service that He allows me to experience failures and disappointments, that He allows me to be weak and struggle with fears within and without... AND not just that, He POINTS out these failures to me in one way or another... especially my repeated failures, sins and stumbles...

Think my old response would have been to be very disappointed even more at my own failures and start falling into despair and self-pity. But thank God for my dear shepherd, Peter, who reminded me last year about distinguishing btwn worldly sorrow (bad sorrow) vs godly sorrow - that's good sorrow, and just as imptly, discerning WHEN I'm abt to fall into the trap of worldly sorrow...

Now I find myself more confident and alert this time around (esp during matriculation season when i find myself especially prone to negative thoughts and physical tiredness), bcos of what the Bible says abt this issue, in recognising and putting to death this worldly sorrow that i am so prone to. (I imagine myself using 2 Corinthians 7:10 like a bayonet, sticking it into the throat of the undead zombie of the old Yeu Ann, the sinful nature of mine... violent imagery, yes, but spiritual warfare is no less real than physical warfare.) Praise God for His Word, that is sharper than any sword, that helps me live the right (and victorious) way! :D

So what's the new perspective today that somehow struck me during service? That God is using all these "mini-trials" where i face up to my own weaknesses, personal and character failings, and external difficulties and frustrations, NOT to 'tekan' me, BUT to TRAIN me and show me more abt the true myself... AND to show me what I need to change in... all these trials, testings and temptations are an integral part of His shaping of my character, personality, lifestyle, dreams, hopes, manhood and future fatherhood and God knows what else. :)

---

And you know what? After I came back from service, I just now flipped open this book by John Ortberg ("The Life You've Always Wanted"), and surprise! The pages that I first set my eyes upon were:

Start with Small Trials
To be formed and transformed through trials, the place to start is with little ordeals. The place is when "all kinds of trials and temptations" crowd into our lives, as the Phillips version expresses James 1:2.

Often I am humbled by my failure to endure even the smallest trials...

[...]

Life is filled with minitrials. When someone interrupts me, I can learn to graciously hold my tongue. When my co-worker borrows something and doesn't return it immediately, I can learn patience. When I have a headache, I can discover that it is possible to suffer and not tell everybody about it. As simple as it sounds, the place to start being formed by trials is with the mini variety.

But we need to add persistence for the large trials. Perhaps you need to identify the greates challenge of your life right now, or a dilemma you are about ready to give up on. Make a commitment that you are going to relentlessly persevere in prayer.

Perhaps the challenge is relational. Is someone you love far from God and you have about given up hope? Is it a pattern of sin in your life that you haven't been able to break and you feel as if you will be in its grip forever? Is it a new habit you would do well to cultivate? Is it a family rupture that has been going on for years?

Are we on the road to Moriah? Surely we will experience suffering of one sort or another. Yet the question remains: How will we run the race? Will we finish well? Will we keep the faith?

We do not accomplish this from sheer strength of will. The reason we can trust God is that he understands what it is to walk in darkness. One message of the Cross is that God chooses not to stand apart from our suffering. He is not unmoved by the pain of the creatures he loves. He embraces that pain and suffers with us. Karl Barth wrote that God would rather be unblessed with his creatures than to be the blessed God of unblessed creatures.

[NB: i really wasn't thinking of looking for a message from God by random flipping - that's not usually how God wants to speak to us, unless He confirms it thru the Bible and other means.]

I'm super-touched, not only bcos He is working in my life, but also bcos, in a small way, today, I've managed to (or rather, He let me) catch a glimpse of His super-big heart, His ways of dealing with men... And I tell you, nothing is as thrilling as seeing God's very own character, and knowing a little more about how He behaves... how He feels for us... how He loves... how He hates... how He JUST is!

He JUST simply is A-W-E-S-O-M-E!!!

Yup, I REALLY want to know God's ways better... to love Him more each day... to listen to His gentle voice and His mighty heartbeat that roars at the world's injustices, that throbs with pain for the lost, and that sings with joy every time a sinner comes to Him to be saved... that I may share His very own heartbeat too... that my heart may more and more beat together with His mighty heart of hearts.

---

No wonder Moses asked God, "If you are pleased with me, teach me Your ways so I may know you and continue to find favor with you... Now show me your glory."

And what the Lord replied to Moses: "There is a place near me where you may stand on a rock. When my glory passes by, I will put you in a cleft in the rock and cover you with my hand until I have passed by. Then I will remove my hand and you will see my back; but my face must not be seen."

And Moses did indeed get to see God's glory with his own eyes... even though it was just a little bit... it's just the "demo version" of what God's very own character is like! :D

---

Thinking... some practical things that I think He wants me to change in...
Firstly, after a series of 3 consecutive experiences in which some ppl said to me that the advice that I share with some ppl, yes I've got good intentions, but they need time to be alone / not in a very receptive mood / filled to the brim and need to have time... I realised that what I'm doing is not right... not that the advice is wrong... but what they need more is a fuller understanding of their situation... time to be alone... where just keeping an open ear to listen to their feelings (and definitely not preaching!) is much, much, much more ministering...

Think the Spirit put this verse (1 Cor 8:1b) in my mind as an additional agreement... "Knowledge [as in my own knowledge and opinions of what they should do) puffs up, but love builds up." It really struck me there, bcos i realised that yah, i've been so full of how much i know, and how many opinions i have of things... that i have neglected the importance of loving the other person.

How important listening is! James 1:19-20 (which i heard in today's sermon by Jasmine) says (which I heard during sermon today): "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." It spoke to me not only in the area of understanding ppl, but also in the area of self-control and anger.

'Cos I was worried about having my temper grow out of control... bcos actually, i tend to get very agitated every time a particular someone loses his temper and starts shouting at me over the phone when he has problems with the computer or printer. i know he's frustrated bcos he has deadlines to rush, but i keep finding it very hard to keep my cool and stay controlled. in fact i started scolding him over the phone to keep quiet (sometimes i use the words, "SHUT UP!") and let me do the asking of questions instead. (It really isn't easy to be a tech support guy when the other person on the phone is screaming at you.)

I feel very troubled everytime this person calls me for tech support, because I really find it very hard to control my temper and stay calm while trying to figure out what is wrong with the computer / printer / God knows what else over the phone AND solve it on the spot.

So i was praying to God today how can i overcome this temper problem? i really don't want to be a captive to my temper, i want to please God, to exercise greater self-control even when i'm mentally tired, emotionally exhausted and angry. I said to God that I'm really afraid because if this temper of mine is not kept under control, i may go on to do even worse things in future. Yah, i know, some pple have said that I'm a patient guy... that IS a miracle from Jesus! Because by nature, I am DEFINITELY NOT a patient person at all. So any patience that you see in me is solely a result of what Jesus has done in my life ever since i asked Him to come into my life.

So i'm very touched also because today's passage was from Ephesians 4... and one of the verses that Jasmine spoke about was this: "'In your anger do not sin': Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold."

Praise God! :D it's really so sweet of how He hears my prayer and answers it in such an exact way... thru that sermon, God pointed out James 1:19-20 to me, which answered my prayer, "How can i control and overcome my temper problem?" Jasmine highlighted these key words in this verse: "Everyone should be quick to listen, sl-o-o-o-w to speak and sl-o-o-o-w to become angry..."

So realised the cure for this temper problem is stated very clearly in James 1:19-20... "be QUICK! to listen! SLOOOOOOOOOW to speeeeeeeaaaaaaaak... and slooooooooooooooooooooow to become angrrrrrreeeeeeeeeee." Hahaha... really very touched by how God really can speak into my life when I really ask Him for advice and help.

I'm determined to put these reflections into practice NOW. Because James 1:22 says, "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says."

A visual analogy i use to help me understand the power of putting reflections and understandings into practice is like soldiers who conduct daily raids on the enemy's strongholds and trenches... even though these may not be as dramatic as en-masse charges (i.e. one big-time concerted all-out effort to have a massive breakthru in some area of my life), they can be no less powerful and effective in achieving breakthrus. Little by little... we're taking ground... every prayer a powerful weapon; strongholds down, tumbling down and dOwN and DOWN! Just like what I happened to glance at another Christian reading next to me on the MRT - it was on overcoming struggles with sins and strongholds in one's life... to paraphrase, "Often the battle against the devil requires that one battle doggedly and determinedly, taking ground little by little."

Amen! Our God is a GOOD and GREAT GOD! :D

Faithfulness and Obedience

Hmm... just finished sending some emails that I'd promised to send a few days ago. Felt quite guilty for procrastinating, but I remember what the Bible says about worldly sorrow versus godly sorrow.

Hmm...

Think the past few days, I've been starting to feel increasingly 'sian' and discouraged in my calling people up for the upcoming Alpha programme. And ironically, it's after a series of very encouraging calls - the freshmen are generally responsive, I'm getting to know them better, etc. etc...

But the negative feelings have been starting to flood in again - feelings of discouragement, 'sian'-ness, and when i start procrastinating because of the sian-ness, i start feeling guilty all over again.

But you know, really gotta thank God for His preparation beforehand... what Wenjiang taught during the Uni District camp about putting on the spiritual armour of God, esp the belt of truth - we choose to obey the truth, not our feelings - and the shield of faith. Also Peter told me to pray to God for increasing awareness of my sins - not just when i have sinned, but especially when I am going to sin. To be watchful and alert, like a soldier carefully scanning the jungle before him to make sure he doesn't get ambushed by the enemy, especially those classic traps that any soldier worth his salt should be so familiar with...

Or to put in DOTA terms, it's one thing to make a noob mistake... but it's TOTALLY another thing to make the same noob mistake time after time...

So what does this entry's title have to do with the contents?

Well, just sharing... been reflecting... putting the pieces together about what God has been showing me in His Word the past week... experiences, sharings, "coincidences", etc. etc.... think God is telling me that what I'm experiencing at the moment is a good time to push myself to grow in faithfulness and obedience to God.

Commitment to Christ. What a wonder...









Think have been feeling increasingly sian, but praying that God will protect me. Father, help me, I really want to please You. I keep struggling in the face of my discouragements and negative thoughts, but I know that no matter what, You are the same yesterday, today and forever.

Lord, I'm really feeling quite strung-out and a bit weary. But keep my heart going on for You... remind me ofwhat You have done for me on the cross. I don't want this to be just a religious activity - You know that I really feel like ... just feel quite... intense inside.

Just as I am, though tossed about
With many a conflict, many a doubt,
Fighting within and fears without,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come...

Yeah, Papa... I guess it's not been easy to pen down just exactly what is in my heart. Yet, i'm really grateful to You, Lord... that You have been encouraging me through Your words and Your precious promises... it assures my heart to knwo that I'm not alone through this time.

Ha, hope You like my entry, God... i guess this is hopefully another step, breakthrough in becoming more real with You, with my feelings and thoughts.

Just as I am, poor, wretched, blind;
Sight, riches, healing of the mind,
Yea, all I need in Thee to find,
O Lamb of God, I come, I come...

Hmm... guess I feel really masculine, actually, as I write this entry... it's nice to know that, despite all my attempts, my emotions don't really flow out as easily as I would want it to be... and I think that's a good thing, in a way.

Perhaps it's because I'm learning to be stronger emotionally, at least, by the grace of God, more emotionally mature than last time. I guess, to be able to speak frankly what's on my mind and my heart without being emotional - to be like You, Jesus, full of emotions, but not emotional (as in being affected easily by emotions).

Ha, thanks for listening, God. I guess it really helps just to be able to write something to You... thanks for being with me always, just as You have already said. Really want to be more and more secure in what You've promised in Your words. And You know how I love beautiful words. And there are none as beautiful as Yours, Daddy.

In Jesus' most precious name,
Amen.

A testimony of testimonies

Very encouraged indeed... We had CG, and Joyce shared not one, but two wonderful testimonies... her testimonies really was so encouraging! And after CG, Yufen, Bowen and I were on our way back, waiting for the MRT, when an old friend from JC, Shaowei, appeared. He's an extremely intelligent guy, on a scholarship, a Maths "god". :) I chatted with him, and found out that he accepted Christ 5 years ago, during his NS days. Before that, he was an atheist.

So I asked him, "How did you become a Christian?"

He replied, "Through a dream." He went on to describe how God helped him see his need for Him, and after he asked Jesus into his life, he prayed on a Saturday, "Jesus, I believe in You, but I really don't know much about You. Can you tell me more about Yourself?"

The next Monday, an army Christian friend of his passed him a book on Christianity. (If I remember Shaowei's words correctly, it's "Questions of Life: A Practical Introduction to the Christian Faith" by Nicky Gumbel, founder of the Alpha Programme.) This Christian friend told Shaowei that he was walking with his girlfriend on Saturday, and then suddenly, his girlfriend said that she felt at that moment like buying a particular book - the very book that Shaowei was holding 2 days later. You figure the rest of the story...

When I heard this, I was, like, so amazed and encouraged! :D Wow... Shaowei said to YF, Bo and me that a lot of people must have been praying for him. He said that some Christian friend had tried to debate with him before, but he wasn't convinced. But what argument alone could not do, the power of God was more than enough to save him - not through wise and persuasive words, but with a simple dream.

So something I was refreshed and reminded of after that meeting with Shaowei, was how SO essential prayer is when we are telling others about Jesus. We can share and share till the cows come home, but if we don't have God's help, the guy can't know God. Like Jesus said, "This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless the Father has enabled him." And Paul said that "I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow."

So want to encourage you guys, if you're Christian and sharing the Gospel with someone for a long time, take heart! :D Pray, pray and pray... because nothing is impossible for God!

---

Thinking about it... what makes a testimony really so wonderful? And why is the Christian faith so full of testimonies? As the apostle Paul wrote to Philemon, "I pray that you may be active in sharing your faith..."

Think the answer can be summed up in one word: God.

Somehow, think the most amazing and encouraging testimonies are those where we hear of coincidences that are... simply so timely, so statistically improbable, that... they can't be coincidences. It's way too beyond the 99% confidence interval test; it passes the t-test with flying colours; it flattens the null hypothesis left, right and centre. It's those times, in the most improbable of situations, that Jesus shows Who's The Boss, and prove yet once again, why He pwns the entire game. :)

Because, at the end of the day, it's all about what Jesus has done! Nothing about me. Everything about Him! It's really super-thrilling to hear, every single time, to hear of what God has done, especially when things work out in such an improbable and wonderful way that the whole thing shouts "JESUS WAS HERE!!!"

Amen! :D

About the recent District Camp... (part II)

Oh yes... want to write about the nite walk.

It was long. It was tiring. But it was good.

Very good.

Very very good.

Very incredibly good.

Incredibly incredibly good.

Incredibly extraordinarily amazingly good.

Haha... ok, more seriously, really treasure that time. There's a lot more to reflect about myself during the camp... the dark part of the walk esp spoke to me, and the uncertainty of the destination ("Eh, where are we heading???") itself was an object lesson to me...

Maybe I'll write this down another time, if ever. :)

About the recent District Camp...

Hmm, keep on wanting to blog about it from time to time... but in the end, for what purpose would I be blogging? Personally think it's better to keep and treasure what I've learnt in my heart and put it into practice... I want to bear fruit with what I've learnt!

Still, really (I mean it) thank God for this camp. This camp has been one of the sweetest times of fellowship that I've experienced in my whole life, honestly... I especially treasure the fellowship that we had on the 2nd nite of camp, when we were all sharing about our camp objectives, and when one of the bros was asking about Holy Spirit baptism, and how all the other bros n sisters encouraged him with testimonies...

Something that struck me as very real was that I was really seeing the Body of Christ in action. "The body is a unit, though it is made up of many parts; and though all its parts are many, they form one body." It struck me, how different each person's testimony and sharing was, and yet on a higher scale, when you take a step back and look at the theme, all our different testimonies were so united - how God touched our lives, how He helped us experience the baptism of the Holy Spirit... how He spoke to us in different ways...

I marvel indeed at the wonder of the Body of Christ. It's something that only God Himself can do - to unite many very different people of different cultures into one united body! :D

---

On a more personal note, I made 3 objectives before going for the camp. The first one was to ask God for directions for my life, 'cos I'm graduating at the end of this year. And secondly, to ask Him to deepen my convictions, and thirdly, to deepen the time of fellowship, that I may know my bros n sisters in my CG better.

He answered my prayers, every one of them! :D

For directions for my life and ministry, during worship, He spoke to me 2 phrases: "I've placed you here exactly where I want you to be." and another, "A servant heart." These two phrases helped to clear the fear in my heart. Could really sense His assurance upon me at this point in time.

And for deepening of convictions, Ps Jeff's preaching and Claramae's teaching really stirred up my heart... somehow, I felt the fire of God in my heart being stoked up once again after so long... somehow I think Jesus was speaking very clearly to me and pointing me in the right direction, reminding me to keep my desire for God central.

And for fellowship, ha, amazing... I really saw the Body of Christ so powerfully in action that night... when a diverse and disparate group of people were united as one in Christ when we shared that night.

Praise God for His mighty works;
Praise Him in His sanctuary;
Praise Him for His awesome power;
Praise Him for His amazing grace!

Got a new computer!

Dell Intel Core Duo 2.8 GHz with 1 GB DDR2 500+MHZ RAM, 128 ATI graphics card with HyperMemory technology, 160GB HDD... etc. etc

Ah my inner geek is contented.... thank God! :D

Haha... and would you believe it if I told you I was playing Minesweeper on that system? (Lame!)

And that no matter how fast the system, I still only manage to score 27s for Beginner level? (Lamer!)

Haha... anyway, very thankful to God for this new system... hope it blesses my family much more now. And can do my multimedia jobs faster now.

Be joyful always!

Hmm, want to thank God for His love and grace to me... He prepared me beforehand the disappointment that He'd knew I'd face when seeing my results today.

Yep, you guessed it - my results weren't good, honestly. All my grades were below expectations. But praise Daddy indeed - He knows exactly my fears, my struggles and my desires - and He carries me through! Very touched, because He knows my love language - words - and yesterday, He caused me to read through not one, but TWO articles on crosswalk.com - one of them on what if you had many plans, but God suddenly ("suddenly" as from your perspective) called you to a totally different route? and the other one being dealing with disappointment - disappointment can actually be a good thing, because it cause you to look upwards.

And He gave me not one, but TWO Bible verses to steady my heart and encourage me.
The first one was during my QT today: "Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." And the second one was this verse that I happened to see just before I checked my results: "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails."

aMeN! So I am encouraged, simply because I know that God Himself allowed this to happen, and if in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose, and if God has let this thing happen to me, then by logical deduction, we can deduce that even in this disappointment, God is already working for my good, because He loves me and has a wonderful plan for me. aMeN! Praise God...

"Though I may not understand / All the plans You have for me / My life is in Your hands / And through the eyes of faith I can clearly see...

That His love is everlasting,
And His mercies,
They will never end!!!

God is good, all the time!
He put a song of praise
In this heart of mine
God is good, all the time!
Through the darkest night
His light will shine..."

Super-touched... that's why I'm not as disappointed as I could have been... mainly because God prepared me beforehand with the precious promise of His presence and His words of encouragement. So even in the face of this disappointment, I know that it was already foreseen by Him, even before time began, and even my poor grades, and the broken me, are all in His hands, crafted into His perfect plans. This is, from His eyes, and through the eyes of faith, only a small infinitesimal drop in the sheer magnitude of His perfect plan to redeem all humanity.

Yup, am reminded of Wenjiang's teaching on prayer during the uni district camp about the "Spiritual Armour" prayer... to take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one (e.g. discouragement, negative thoughts, doubts, fears, etc...), take up the sword of the Spirit (ie. the word of God) e.g. the Bible verses that remind me to trust God's heart no matter what happen, and to pray in the Spirit... which I really need, because on my own, I can't stand, unless He helps me to stand firm.

So I've got one more semester... I've done the calculations... it is possible for me to get Honours, but I'll have to really push very hard. Honestly, feel a bit afraid, but let that draw me closer to Jesus and hold His hand even tighter as we walk together through the last semester. Even now the winter is passing, even now spring is coming. O give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever! :D

Woods

Isn't it a coincidence that I was thinking of two separate things, among many things, that I wanted to write down in this entry, and they both talk about woods?

Yes, woods as in forest, etc. etc. Not wood as in Woodbridge, as in "referee kayu"... :P

Seriously, have been very busy these few weeks with helping do publicity clips for multimedia... and seriously, nothing feels so shiok as sensing Jesus' affirmation in your heart when you give your best to serve Him... :) "Well done, good and faithful servant!"

About writing down these reflections and connect-the-dots, I think not yet; I still have many things to complete first before I can write down what I think God has been doing in my life these past three weeks.

As Frost expressed it so beautifully in his poem,
"The woods are lovely, dark, and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep."

Praise Jesus. What a wonderful friend I have in Him. :D

Troubled in spirit

Wow! Another miracle... praise God! :D He is so sweet, as always.

Hm... just had finished writing an encouragement card for Sijia and was about to get up and look for her, when she came into the classroom looking for me! :D

'cos she had bought a Kitkat for me... LOL we both laughed and she said, "God connected our hearts together."

aMeN! :)

Then she asked me, "Are you all right? You seem a bit troubled by something..."

Was a bit surprised... then thought abt it... yeah, it's true, but I can't exactly put my finger on it why i feel a bit troubled. So told her that, and she thought abt it for a bit. Then she said, "Hmm... maybe you can pray more to God about this..."

Hmm... yes I'll pray to You Lord abt this... Jer 33:3... i dun quite know what exactly is this that makes me feel a bit troubled in spirit. could it be the same thing what i had shared with Robert about a few days ago? Lord, i'm not sure... but tell me pls...

Love You, Lord.

---

I remember this verse where Jesus spoke abt being troubled in spirit too... wonder if it's speaking to me here?

John 12:27-28a:

"Now my heart is troubled, and what shall I say? 'Father, save me from this hour'? No, it was for this very reason I came to this hour. Father, glorify your name!"

Have bolded the parts that seem to speak to me especially... wonder if God is trying to tell me something? God I want to hear from You...

Gospel of Judas - a well-written essay

Hmm! Came across this article: http://shangjun.blogspot.com/2006/04/gospel-of-judas-response.html

Think it's very well-written, complete wif reference lists. From what I've read in that essay, it's most likely written to other Christians.

Still, think this part I read is useful for everyone in general who has questions abt the authenticity of the canonicity of the Christian Bible, which in simpler English means, "The guys who put the Bible together - did they just anyhow whack or can trust what they did?"

As I have previously shared, there was stringent criteria used to decide which books should be included in the canon. Norman Geisler and Nix present the principles as follows (Geisler/Nix, GIB, 223-231):

1) Was the book written by a prophet of God? If it was written by a spokesman of God, then it was from God.

2) Was the writer confirmed by acts of God? Frequently, miracles separated the true prophets from the false ones. E.g. Moses, Isaiah etc.

3) Did the message tell the truth about God? God cannot contradict himself. Maccabees in the Catholic apocrypha pushes the doctrine of purgatory, but nowhere else in the scriptures is purgatory supported or even mentioned.

4) Does it come with the power of God? If the message of the book did not achieve its stated goal, and did not have the power to change a life, then God was apparently not behind its message.

5) Was it accepted by the people of God? Paul’s letters were widely read in the Churches then. When a book was received, read, collected and used by the people of God as the Word of God, it was regarded as canonical.

Incidentally came across a very nicely-done pamphlet espousing the Book of Mormon (which the Mormons put on equal par wif the Bible). Was discussing abt it wif Mich, and she commented that we need to consider why we say that the Book of Mormons is not true as compared to the Christian Bible...

And I'll add, ditto for other scriptures of other religions e.g. the Koran, the Buddhist scriptures, the Vedas, etc...

So why do I believe the Bible is true?
Hmm! interesting question... i'll think abt it more and write down next time. It's good to understand why we believe what we believe, 'cos reason is a crucial part of the Christian faith.

I just remembered this part of the Bible... in this letter, the apostle Peter himself answered this very question abt the reality of Christ [and affirms the divine authority of the letters written by his co-worker, Paul]. (Whoa, the Bible really got the answer to any qn tt u can throw at it!)

"So I will always remind you of these things, even though you know them and are firmly established in the truth you now have. I think it is right to refresh your memory as long as I live in the tent of this body, because I know that I will soon put it aside, as our Lord Jesus Christ has made clear to me. And I will make every effort to see that after my departure you will always be able to remember these things.

We did not follow cleverly invented stories when we told you about the power and coming of our Lord Jesus Christ, but we were eyewitnesses of his majesty. For he received honor and glory from God the Father when the voice came to him from the Majestic Glory, saying, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased." We ourselves heard this voice that came from heaven when we were with him on the sacred mountain.

And we have the word of the prophets made more certain, and you will do well to pay attention to it, as to a light shining in a dark place, until the day dawns and the morning star rises in your hearts. Above all, you must understand that no prophecy of Scripture came about by the prophet's own interpretation. For prophecy never had its origin in the will of man, but men spoke from God as they were carried along by the Holy Spirit."

(2 Peter 1)

And later on in his letter, he defends the Scriptural authority of Paul's letter:

"Bear in mind that our Lord's patience means salvation, just as our dear brother Paul also wrote you with the wisdom that God gave him. He writes the same way in all his letters, speaking in them of these matters. His letters contain some things that are hard to understand, which ignorant and unstable people distort, as they do the other Scriptures, to their own destruction."

(2 Peter 3)

There are other factors to consider though, the authenticity of Peter's letter itself... (a) was it really written by the apostle Peter himself, and (b) how do we know that even if it was written by Peter himself, that 2 Peter is Scripture too?

Think i'll answer it this way:
a. Well, yes, there are some scholarly concerns e.g. the writing style of 2 Peter is slightly different from 1 Peter (the Greek of 2 Peter is more refined). But a reasonable explanation can be given for the possiblity that Peter may have used a (more educated) scribe to write 2 Peter, as compared to 1 Peter which was most likely written by Peter himself (in his 'rougher' style).
b. Check the above guidelines for canonicity...



But more than that... simply put, truth is truth, and you wouldn't need a set of guidelines to tell you explicity what truth is... simply because truth has the power to impact lives whether you believe it or not. For instance, a lot of books say that taking revenge in your own hands instead of waiting for justice is wrong and has devastating consequences. Now there are other books that claim the opposite.

Put these 2 opposing claims to the test... see what are the consequences of taking revenge, and decide which claim is true.

So along the same line, I'll add that even though we use guidelines, etc. to help us determine the truth of Scriptures...the million dollar question would be: what are the effects of living out those texts that you choose to believe in?

I'll quote from my friend's blog - like it a lot.

To those non-Christians reading this blog.. if we were to debate about the reality of Christ; just like any other debate, the one who wins is the one who goes in more prepared, who speaks better, who knows all the subtle tricks of argumentation (yes, it's true) , and the one who is able to command a greater presence in the discussion. The person who brought me to know Christ was a master at this.. and for the better part of a year I had to rely on these human arguments to prop up my faith.

Talk is one thing though. A person can leave the debating table defeated, but still unconvinced. I could win a debate with a "untrained" free-thinker, but what good does it do if I just focus on the arguments? Christianity is anything but sophistry. The more important thing that Christians can bring to the table, the biggest trump card, is the fact that God changes lives, and for the better. Various schools of moral philosophy, be it utilitarism, moral relativism or whatever you might mention - does not teach you how to live a rich and meaningful life. Christianity does. And that visible change is the thing that really draws people to God. All the arguments for God aren't worth a single penny compared to the power of a transformed life.

And the best part? You don't need to read philosophical tracts to be a Christian. You don't need an IQ of 140 to be a Christian. You don't need a net worth of a million dollars to be a Christian. Philosophy which requires an thinking mind, and induces headaches nonetheless. Christianity only requires that you believe, and you live it out. That's all.

In fact, God's existence is a fact that transcends other facts. I think if scientists say that "Oh, we've got it wrong all this while, actually Pi = 4" or "F actually is 0.9(ma)", or something along that lines.. well, it wouldn't really bother me. But God's existence is a fact that transcends all other facts, because not only it is a intellectual truth, but a emotional truth as well.

Christianity is not just about the visible outward signs - I dare say that church going, attending cell groups and all that is the lesser component of a Christian life. The far greater, and the far most precious part, is that fact the Christ changes lives, for the better.

God really has changed mine, hope you will experience it too one day..

Yup... really agree. 'cos to be honest, i also was a skeptic too. But there's this verse in the Bible that says very clearly: "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation - the old has gone; the new has come!"

When i see what Christ has done in my life, and the many many signs and wonders - honestly, some of these signs and wonders really stun me - that God has so wonderfully done in my life... (of all lives, mine???? wow... He really got such a super-big heart for even small shrimps like me! :D :D :D!) Yes! ONLY Jesus can change HEARTS and ONLY He is the Saviour! When you have "Ah Longs" (loansharks aka tax collectors), prostitutes, murderers, brutal concentration camp guards, proud religious men, witch doctors, cannibals etc. turning to Jesus... whoa...... you see their lives... their hearts... even their very faces, eyes and physical appearances change for the better!

I know... I've myself seen the very transformation happening in these people's lives - others and my own too... i really have seen this wif my own eyes n i tell you the Good News of Jesus Christ is really true! Frankly, no religion or philosophy or self-improvement values etc... can change that hardest-of-all-things-to-change... the heart. Only God Himself can change that hopeless heart that keep doing hopeless things with a hopeless life and hopeless future ahead. Only God can save us from ourselves!

For surely there IS A GOD who loves us and has come to save us from this shit that we are all in - we all got ourselves into this deep shit, but Christ came to save us from it all... and He died for you and me... and best of all, He rose from the dead, appeared to over 500 EYEwitnesses... and told them to go tell the world about Him, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have life eternal!



So come, taste and see that the Lord is good! You'll like Him! :)

The Five Love Languages

Took this quiz... yup, it's true, words really are my primary love language n i love to be hugged too! How abt you? Do take time to try out tis quiz... :)

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Words of Affirmation
with a secondary love language being
Physical Touch.

Complete set of results

Words of Affirmation:		12
Physical Touch:		8
Quality Time:		7
Receiving Gifts:		2
Acts of Service:		1

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

A piece of Singaporean history: Who still remembers Teleview?

Was doing some reading on videotex systems for my Communications and New Media term paper, when I remembered Teleview... used it for a short while in 1995, when I was in Sec 2... (Whoa!That's more than 10 years ago... :)). Then the Internet came along, and I had to use a text-based browser to surf the net...

Yes, you read it right, it was text-based ONLY... gosh, think I really can tell my grand-children in future, "When I was your age, all our browsers were TEXT-only!!!" (and thump the floor with my walking stick for emphasis).

(Incidentally, the text-based browser (it's called Lynx) is still available, and pretty snappy to use too, though the mystical world of black-and-white text can be a bit disorientating for us non-geeks who've been dwelling in the wonderful world of Oz-like 24-bit colours of graphical browsers...)

So does anyone still remember that info-text system that we Singaporeans used back so long ago? :)

Oh Teleview, we hardly knew ye...

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?

Had felt melancholic n quite ... just really feel that "paralysing" sense of gloominess. HYP, feelings of disappointment, guilt, etc. etc. Same things around again.

But praise God, He heard my cry for mercy... love Him so much. He reminded me of this verse:

"Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?... No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved
us."

And the old demons went away. Surely the word of God is so powerful. Medicine for the soul, food for the hungry, water to the thirsty, honey to the bitter in spirit.

I'm glad that He has helped me breakthrough in some areas. Longing to share them with someone else, but think the time hasn't come yet. Wait for the Lord, be still and wait patiently for the Lord.