Sunday, August 1, 2010

Personal Updates: Being Equipped

I was talking with Guanrui a few weeks back. I'm really very inspired by this dear brother, this man of God. Something he said in an SMS struck me a lot. That he wants to use his 3 years bond as a teacher to equip himself for the missions field, especially after coming back from his Cambodia missions trip. And I remembered too my chats with Andrew my neighbour, and his sharing with me his desire to prepare himself for missions.

Then, about a couple of weeks or so back, this word started coming into my mind repeatedly: "equipping". I think the Holy Spirit was gently guiding me to start thinking about becoming equipped for missions.

How it came: it wasn't an act of man, I would say, not a human directive, but simply the gentle call of the Holy Spirit. First He gave me the direction, and then called me to leave here, and go there. After all these things... like my career switch and my caregroup switch... then, and only then, did I start getting strong promptings to see what I could do to start equipping myself for the missions field.

I wondered how should I start preparing. I also saw just how much I lacked in terms of readiness and how challenging it would be. But thank God for His wisdom. If He hadn't called me to do smaller things - and showed His mighty power to provide, I think I might not have the courage to even start looking at the bigger challenges needed for the missions field.

Well, I started doing up a 5-years plan two Saturdays ago. It wasn't hard, actually - I did it in half an hour. And I did it because I really wanted to. That's a real miracle for someone who Does Not Like Planning.

And yah, there's some significant challenges to be overcome before I can get ready to fly off and go where God wants me to go. And oh, the journey to be ready is so, so, so long. I honestly think it might take me YEARS to be ready - speaking from a human viewpoint, that is.

But I'm encouraged that God brought me to watch the movie about Mama Heidi with my ex-sub-district (I gate-crashed it haha) some time ago. So encouraged.

And reminded that what God really requires of me in terms of character is very simple. To act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with my God. Simple, but not easy. Very deep and profound, actually, if you meditate on Micah 6:8.

And training in wisdom too. I am experiencing for myself personally the truth of this Scripture: "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom..." Inspired by Peter's life example, I've started memorising and sharing Proverbs with others, and applying these proverbs into my own life. I am not the wisest of men, on the contrary, the most ignorant of men, but well, to know that I don't know is a great thing, 'cos it means that I can start learning what I do not know. :D

Children's ministry. The mime that I did. Storytelling. My workplace. Community care. Ministry CG. The calling. Preparing for volunteering in a reading programme. Finances. Developing working skills using my attachment as a learning platform. So many things I see coming together already... but the picture is still not complete yet.

So many things. But God is my God and He will guide me even unto the end. Seriously, really want to just bless His heart. And seeing the multitudes of those who have not heard of Christ yet... the call is so urgent. How? How? I am only a child, Lord. I do not know what to do. But here I am anyway, send me please! In Jesus' holy name, I pray Amen!

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