"Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe."

I am so very frustrated, disgusted and appalled at myself. Why do I keep on being so scared of others?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What a curse! What a disgust! What a horror! I hate it! Why do I keep worrying so much about what others will think of me, even when I want to do the right thing?!!

Enough! I must fight against my fears. Not to listen to the whispers of the devil! But to just pray and GO!

ENOUGH!

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Edited to add:
I chose to write the above on this blog, because I know that deeper within me is something more serious. I am furious with my own cowardice. I think I missed a divine opportunity, a kairos moment, simply because I was too scared to ask, even though it is a good and right thing. Weeping and gnashing of teeth - I think I now know better what Jesus was talking about!

I am very angry with myself, because if there's one thing I really hate - it is missing out on a possible moment to be used by God / experience Him even more - but because of fear and cowardice - I do not do the good thing that He wants me to do. Then as a result, I miss out on the opportunity and it's lost!

James 4:17
Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins.

That is WHY I am so pissed off with myself, with my cowardice. Lord, forgive me for not believing Your promises and acting upon them immediately in faith.

Romans 14:23
"But the man who has doubts is condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin."

I have no desire to miss out on the move of God. The price for doing God's will may be high, but the cost of NOT doing God's will is CATASTROPHIC!

GRRRR!

*pause*

Cooling down. Lord, I'm so sorry for sinning against You. For not trusting in Your goodness, Your promises, Your power, Your might, Your endless love. I missed this opportunity, yet have mercy on my soul I pray. Lord... help me remember not to be a coward with "prudence" as an excuse to delay. To be prudent... and act promptly. Prudence must never be a cover for cowardice, but to be prudently bold.

SIGH.