Saturday, July 3, 2010

Lord, how long do I have to sit here and count the stars?

I guess I feel lonely and tired and discouraged. I know that externally it looks like I'm failing, but in my heart I know I'm still on the path that You want me to be on. It's just that I feel discouraged by the fact that I'm slow and lack discipline and speed to do what needs to be done. I know the last 3 months are what You want me to be actually doing.

Suddenly it strikes me that the Karate Kid movie must have been used by You to speak to me. I remember that scene where the master taught Jade by getting him to drop, pick up and hang up his jacket countless times. And he taught Jade that everything is gongfu. Putting this into the biblical context of discipleship, I think I see how You have been discipling me in my working style. the basics of punctuality, training in endurance and serving You even when things are hard. And now after doing all these things, the 'real' training for what You have called me to do is beginning. Lesson plans and interacting w the kids... this is what You are guiding me to do. But first You are training me to BE what you want me to be.

Can one ever be perfect? No, not on this side of eternity. But can one be complete? Yes, ready (mature) and not lacking anything essential.

So yes this is training ground. It's not easy but train me Father just as You please. Amen.

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