4 Parts of A Sheep

As shepherds we take care of different parts of our sheep

“Body” - We need to care physically/economically and promote fairness as much as possible.

“Heart“- We need kindness in our hearts for the person and express it appropriately.

“Mind“- We encourage personal development and use of their talents/giftings.

“Spirit“- We enhance the meaning of what they are doing in ministry by connectedness to God.

If we overemphasis one or compromise others, we shepherd in a lopsided matter.

The Lord requires us to worship Him with all 4 of these human parts. Not a single part can be neglected. That’ll make a difference whether our sheep skip, walk or drag their feet to serve.

(From 4 Parts of A Sheep, RagsStudio)

I think God has been speaking gently but persistently to me in my heart over the weekend.

Seems like He has been prompting me to get over my emotions and just move on. To do His will, no matter what.

Jesus' words in John 4 came to mind: "My food is to do the will of Him who sent me and to finish His work. Do you not say, '4 months more and then the harvest? I tell you, open your eyes and look at the fields! They are ripe for the harvest.'"

Again, it seems that so many circumstances, people, and of course, His words, have been stirring my heart.

Convicting me of the following areas:
-Need to be excellent in my ministry, serving God not because it's fun (even though it IS a lot of times!), but also when things are tough, because we're doing this for a Higher Calling.
-Need to discard my expectations of others, how they should respond to me... If Jesus Himself didn't come to be served, but to serve, and give his life as a ransom for many... then what excuse do I have?
-And even though there are many times I just want to meet up with people to RECEIVE from them, be it advice or comfort or encouragement, or just enjoy time together... I realised that I need to give back too. To refresh other people.
-To live for the approval of God, not my leaders or people around me. That means I have to be a man of the truth, by the truth and for the truth.
-To sleep more. At the right times. :)

Not that I've not done all these... but I need to persevere in these areas. Not to slide back to my old sinful natural tendencies (which happens daily, actually). But to continually put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness. To live up to what I have already attained - and beyond. To beat my body and make it my slave.

I guess everything that God has been prompting me can be summed up in this central verse that is - how to say - keeps burning in my heart. Yes, a burning deep within:
"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds."

I don't know why, but it just keeps burning and burning my heart day after day. Hee. Thankful and grateful to God that I can experience Him, even in this way. It's a painful joy, but also a joyful pain. :)

"Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us worship God acceptably with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire."

So Saturday was a day of action for me. Doing some things that I'd been increasingly convicted to act upon, and also had a great time with Weizhu on Saturday. Not only receiving from him, but also giving back to him. And felt even more refreshed than if I'd only received from him. Whoa.

"Trillion is the new billion."

"Trillion is the new billion."

Joyce wrote a very thought-provoking post about the financial crisis, and how God must be our sure anchor in these times.

And I've been thinking about how easy it is to lose money just like that. Was talking with a brother today about his investments - he said he might have lost a really substantial amount of money (it's a five-figure sum).

And I've read the Straits Times today - they really devoted a lot of pages to the financial crisis. (Did anyone think of investing in Singapore Press Holdings? Apparently newspapers sell pretty well in these bad times... :))

One thing that struck me was how often financial crisis after crisis keep recurring. It only serves to reinforce how transient our wealth can be. But it's a great thing, because God purposely allows the markets to be shaken, to remind us from time to time that financial wealth is like the shifting sands. Billionaires become millionaires overnight, and millionaires become thousand-naires. And thousand-naires become hundred-naires. And so on.

But Jesus knows the vagaries of the markets better than Warren Buffett. Astutely, he points out the better deal: to invest in what yields eternal returns.

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

"Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

Let's invest our money in what produce truly lasting returns. Let's be rich in good deeds and charity to the poor and needy. Let's use our worldly wealth to win friends, so that when it's gone, we'll be welcomed into eternal dwellings. :)

Let's be really smart investors.

"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose."

Liting's Birthday Celebration at Settlers'

Liting's one of the newest sisters who joined our CG a few weeks ago. She crossed over from Tertiary side. :) 20 years young. Definitely the youngest in our CG, hands-down!

But really, we've been blessed by her heart for God, and her sweet appreciativeness of us... really warms our hearts!

Sis, may you continue to grow in grace and favour with God and men... may 1 Timothy 4:12 be a powerful living testimony in your life too!
Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.

Serving Excellently Comes After Seeing Excellently

WZ and I also talked about those serving in the arts/media ministries. There's two kinds of people:

A. Those who serve, because they enjoy what they do.
B. Those who serve, because they realize their God-given skills and talents are meant to tangibly highlight God's glory and refresh/encourage others.

Nothing bad about those in (A), but we would do better to think about why we really are in ministry. Is it simply for our own enjoyment, or do we see the higher calling in what we do?


Art - a means to help people get touched by God personally

Even in the pastoral ministries... are we serving in CG because "my leader asked me to do this/that"? Or do we listen to the Lord's heartbeat when He said:

"Be shepherds of God's flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve..."

We will never reach true excellence in ministry until we have understood the power and purpose of the ministry we are in.

"Let choirs sing well, or not at all. Otherwise we merely confirm the majority in their conviction... that all this culture and religion (horrid words both) are essentially marginal, amateurish and rather effeminate activities."
C.S. Lewis

Shunrong really is one of my role models when it comes to serving in ministry - both in ushering ministry last time and now in children's ministry. His joyful spirit is very strong and contagious. And I realise it's because he really sees the Higher Cause for what he is doing. And he has faithfully encouraged and exhorted me time and time again to remember why we're in this ministry. Because we're doing this for GOD and for OTHERS.

That's why I really, really believe so much in the importance of children's ministry - not because it's a "cute" ministry or even that I enjoy working with children (I get very tired at times) - but because it's a ministry that can prepare and soften an entire generation to Christ - "to make ready a people prepared for the Lord."

Serving excellently comes after seeing excellently.

Met up with Weizhu today. He told me about some meeting where those who have the burden to serve the needy with funds/expertise for IT.

Whoa. Told him this is one of my dreams - to help them in this area. The "teach a man to fish" concept.

Planning to go down with him to the next meeting next week. :)

Eternally Expired

“All that is not eternal is eternally out of date.” - CS Lewis

Time is of the essence.

Myth: Everyone has an equal chance of becoming a Christ follower.

Reality: Based on extensive research on this topic, our data points out clearly that the faith trajectory of the vast majority of American is mapped out before they become adults, often before they even reach adolescence. In fact, for every one hundred people who are not born again by the time they reach age eighteen, only six of those individuals will commit their lives to Christ for the first time as an adult. Of course, we have to always assume the best about people’s spiritual potential. God can do anything in anyone’s life at any time, and he often does. But consider how likely it would be for you as an adult to be persuaded to convert to another religion right now. You have to admit, it would take a lot to change your views so dramatically.

Think of the implications of this. First, it underscores that Christians should prioritize the faith development of children, a unique time in human development when the vast majority of us “pick” a faith. Second, it implies that we must work hard to strengthen the often-tenuous faith of teenagers, because this is when their faith is gelling.

(From Why I Do What I Do, R³)

This struck home, because during CG on Friday, we all shared our conversion stories, of how we came to faith in Christ. HQ happened to ask at what age we came to Christ. Almost everyone, except HQ, had come to Christ at about 18 years or so. (HQ came to Christ during his first or second year in NTU.)

It struck me there and then how critical it is to touch as many young people as we can for Christ. And that's why my sub-district is aiming to reach those below 25.

Time is of the essence.

On another note, after attending the HopeKids Live service, I realised the importance HopeTots ministry plays in preparing the children for HopeKids. Because if they are not well-disciplined in the early stages of their lives (those below 6 years), then it becomes very much harder to train and disciple them as they go into primary school.

Even Al-Qaeda applies this concept so well - why else would they focus so heavily on using the Internet and schools to indoctrinate young boys?

"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
Proverbs 22:6

Of Talents and Obedience

"God doesn't need talented people - He wants obedient people."
Ravi Zacharias

The Initiative Against Dreaming

"Arise, let us go hence." John 14:31

Dreaming about a thing in order to do it properly is right; but dreaming about it when we should be doing it is wrong. After Our Lord had said those wonderful things to His disciples, we might have expected that He would tell them to go away and meditate over them all; but Our Lord never allowed "mooning" [early 20th-century meaning]. When we are getting into contact with God in order to find out what He wants, dreaming is right; but when we are inclined to spend our time in dreaming over what we have been told to do, it is a bad thing and God's blessing is never on it. God's initiative is always in the nature of a stab against this kind of dreaming, the stab that bids us "neither sit nor stand but go."

If we are quietly waiting before God and He has said - "Come ye yourselves apart," then that is meditation before God in order to get at the line He wants; but always beware of giving over to mere dreaming when once God has spoken. Leave Him to be the source of all your dreams and joys and delights, and go out and obey what He has said. If you are in love, you do not sit down and dream about the one you love all the time, you go and do something for him; and that is what Jesus Christ expects us to do. Dreaming after God has spoken is an indication that we do not trust Him.

(From My Utmost For His Highest, Oswald Chambers)

Of Myths and History

I follow the Alley Oop comic strip regularly, and this particular series caught my attention. Ah. Who'd imagine a cerebral apologetics session of the historical basis of mythology in a children's comic strip? ;)

Lord I love You yes I do
Lord I love you and you know it's true
Lord I love you yes I do
For the Bible says You are faithful and true

Lord You love me yes You do
Lord You love me so tender and true
Lord You love me yes You do
So won't You now come into my heart to rule?

Britons turn to God - online

LONDON - BRITONS fearful about the global financial crisis are turning to God - at least online, flocking in their thousands to a special prayer on the Church of England's website, the Church said on Thursday.
A new 'Prayer for the Current Financial Situation' has been viewed nearly 8,000 times since it was published online in September, increasing traffic to the 'prayers for today' section of the website by 28 per cent.

The number of people visiting a section offering debt advice - including a feature that helps visitors work out how the credit crunch will affect them - has also gone up by 71 per cent in the past few weeks, the Church said.

'I'm delighted the content is resonating with people, and there is something the church has to offer people,' said the Church of England's national steward John Preston, who wrote the debt advice.

'I think that people aren't necessarily going online to seek religion, but as they are browsing, their thoughts turn to it.

'We know that many people do pray, but things are made so accessible by having it online. Instead of having to go somewhere, and find something, we just provide some words that people can go through wherever they are.'

The prayer for the financial crisis notes that 'we live in disturbing days", with rising prices, increasing debts, job losses and collapsing banks, and calls on God to 'be a tower of strength amid the shifting sands'. -- AFP

Training Exercises for the Christian

1 Peter 1:13

Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled;

set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Peter advised me to practice thinking ahead, running "training exercises" in my mind to anticipate my responses, feelings and reactions in conceivable situations. It's something that he does almost every day.

It's a great idea. And 1 Peter 1:13 came to mind - something that David, my first shepherd, had shared with me before.

And this visual simulation exercise, I'm to consider how I feel, and why I feel what I feel, and how I would respond naturally. So that I can be ready, more aware, of potential pitfalls. E.g. if I know I'm going to be in a situation where I'll naturally get angry, then the next time before I go into a potentially heated situation, I can run through the situation as it plays out in my imagination. To make it as realistic as possible.

And this exercise would also help me pray in advance. If I know that in this situation, despite all my best preparations... in which I'll definitely sin or get very affected or do something really stupid, then I can also pray to God, to ask Him for help with whatever I'm going to face.

And it's more purposeful this way. Because I would have prepared myself, and I'll be able to see clearly that what I'm about to go through is actually an opportunity from God to grow and pass the test.

Wow. Amazing. Never thought about it this way. But it IS a biblical thing, to be sure. To prepare my mind for action, be self-controlled, and set my hope fully on the grace to be given me when Jesus Christ is fully revealed. :)

Focus This Way

This one's a very nice video. :)

There are a million things that fill our days, each one pulling our focus in a different direction and leaving us a little more overwhelmed.

Giving Without Expectations

Something sweet today. Was at work, and started thinking about life and so on. Then I remembered the Sermon on the Mount. It made me think. So took my Bible out and laid it besides me, as I did my work.

Things about loving your enemies, going the extra mile... and lending without expectations of getting things back.

Those words made me think. Because HQ had said something to me last night, that I hadn't really paid attention to at that time. He said that those people that I've given without expectations of getting anything back in return, their lives have been blessed by me. But for those whom I expect a lot... I have ended up becoming very disappointed by them when they don't show love to me in the way that I want.

But I think Jesus is teaching me to be more gracious. To learn to be less critical, not to judge, but to grow in appreciativeness of whatever He has given me through these friends that He's placed in my life.

Because I had dinner with Edmund today at Aston Express (in a kopitiam near AMK Jubilee)... and while we were chatting over a deeeelicious steak and BBQ chicken meal, I asked him how's his walk with God been.

He replied thoughtfully, "Good. I have been getting up and thanking God for each day. Even though I'm very tired because of my work, I remind myself that this day could be worse. God has given me life, so I should be thankful. And that I can look for opportunities to learn new things, be it in work or ministry or whatever."

Wow. I thought to myself, "Wow. God must really be speaking to me through Edmund. 'Cos HQ was telling me to not to think negatively, and to treasure whatever God has given me. And now, Edmund is talking about how he's been seeing every day as a gift from God, and despite the tough workload he has, he really sees opportunities to grow every day. This is a beautiful attitude. This is an optimistic spirit. A spirit of faith. I want to learn from this brother. He's a wise brother." Gosh. (Haha. I just realised that I thought all this in the space of a second or two.)

Giving thanks in all circumstances. Giving cheerfully without any expectations of getting anything back in return.

I thought these were just ... it's true... hyperbole.

It turns out that Jesus was right all along. These are principles that will really help me grow.

******
Something about emotions. Emotions are good, even the negative ones, if they help me draw closer to God. And they are bad, even if I'm feeling happy, top-of-the-world, if they draw me away from God.

I blog a lot, especially when I'm in a pensive mood, or even depressed. Partly because it's so cathartic. Partly because this is an open journal, and I'm writing this with the purpose of being open, to encourage fellow Christians who may be struggling with the same kind of issues. And also as a record of my walk with God so far.

But I was thinking. Am I thinking too much about my emotions? I should just put everything aside and just go to God in prayer. To ask Him to settle my heart and renew my mind and restore my soul. More than that, to grow my heart for Him and for people around me. To teach me, rebuke me, correct me and train me in righteousness.

Just thinking. Action+prayer points for me here... to grow in patience, emotional stability, gentleness, kindness, goodness.

Haha. I realise, the more I want to be like Christ, the more I see how I have fallen short. "For all have sinned, and fall short of the glory of God..."

But oh yes. Pride. I realised that I have a subtle pride in me that can't accept the fact that I am not as good as I would like to be. Do I have to feel useful for God to use me? It's my pride laid bare actually. Inwardly, secretly, subtly, poisonously, I enjoy the idea that I've something that makes me that little more special, better than those around me.

But on the other hand, this could be an innate longing in every human's heart, especially a man's heart, that he needs the assurance that he can actually contribute... "Longing just to bring, something that's of worth, that will bless Your heart".

I guess that's a man's deepest thirst. A thirst even deeper than a thirst for life. The thirst for meaning. The thirst to make something useful of his life. And this thirst is not necessarily a bad thing. As CS Lewis wrote, "Thirst was made for water; inquiry for truth." If it brings us closer to the truth, and to God himself...

"The Spirit and the Bride say, 'Come!' And let him who hears say, 'Come!' Whoever is thirsty, let him come; and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life."

Ok. I've written enough. Going to pray and to sleep now. Haha. Tomorrow shall be a brand new day... a day of hope! Because God is already waiting there in the future. :) Thank God for God!

I met up with Huaqiang over dinner before WFL today. Had intended to catch up with him... but God, in all his love, intended more to happen.

HQ asked me how I was in CG. Because he had heard about what I asked my CG to pray for me about two weeks ago. *pause* I don't feel very comfortable right now to share deeper, but to put in a nutshell... I'm still feeling down. After so long.

Yes. I'm not as healthy as I'd like others to see me. And I'm still feeling a lot of downness. Fear and failures. Discouragement and hopelessness. I'm not accepting any comments for this post, because I know what I ought to do. But right now I'm still not strong enough to read any comments or advice at the moment. :) Sorry about it haha, but it's times like these I'm just grateful I can talk to God and to certain people. Like Peter for e.g.

Hmm.

I shared with HQ that I'm feeling disappointed because of my lack of growth... as the man that God wants me to be... and to be honest, I'm very envious of brothers and sisters who are so much more mature than me. I envy, yes, I do...

And taking a look at myself... it's ironic. Pride again, rearing its horrible head. Pride that can't accept the fact that I sin.

And discontentment. Instead of growing in gratefulness to God for the little things in life... I have been so unappreciative of people who love me. Even though sometimes people show me love in ways I don't recognise, it does NOT mean that they don't love me.

And God knows that I have said things that hurt some friends very deeply - saying that I don't feel loved by them, despite the fact that they did all they could to show me how much they love me.

*pause* And I remember now. A brother last time wrote to me on a blog entry that he didn't feel loved by me even though he knew that I've been doing my best to love him... he just didn't feel close to me anyway. My heart broke when I read what he had written. And to be frank... I think our friendship didn't quite reach the same level that it had been before.

So I guess that's how others feel towards me when I am ungrateful to them.

*sober pause*

Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.

For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.

And to be honest, one very recent example was when a certain friend tried to help me man a camera... but I was angry with him. Told him rudely... "Don't interfere!" I was upset with him, because I felt very insecure, thinking that he was treating me like a kid.

Of course, he was upset. He had loving intentions, and he showed his love in this way.

And friends who were less close would have been extremely put-off by what I said, and it's likely the friendship would have cooled down a lot after the words I said. But he graciously, kindly and lovingly told this to me a few weeks later. And now... I think I'm starting to realise that this is a friendship that I've been taking for granted. There are very, very few friendships that can stand this kind of stress.

Bro, you know... I think I can't think of a more faithful kind of friend like you. :) You are truly one of the most faithful friends that God can give anyone. :) Thank God truly for your strength of character.

Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily.

5It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God's love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].

6It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail.

7Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening].

And this passage describes you so well. You're the exact opposite of who I am. Thank you for believing in me, and encouraging me and exhorting me. I would not be ... even the person I am today, without your impact and influence on my life.

Thanks a lot dear bro. :)

So yah. I remember many years ago, I was telling Shirley about this problem... and she told me the same thing. At that time I didn't really want to listen... and now... hmm. I see the same pattern happening again. But thank God He helped me to see at last.

Ah. Have much to learn. There's a lot of dear friends who are so appreciative. I think I gotta learn more from them.

*******
But anyway. HQ reminded me to not to let myself dwell in negative thoughts again, for they aren't of God, but of Satan. Should I listen to the Father of all truth, or to the father of lies?

And 'tis so timely too... I met Ellson after WFL, and he showed me an article that he got in his email. This is part of the article:

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes." (6:10-11)

So often we are overcome with a feeling of powerlessness. Much of powerlessness -- not all -- comes from not using what God has provided. The command in verse 10 is "Be strong1 in the Lord and in his mighty2 power."3 Our problem is that we try to be strong in ourselves, and have not learned the secret of drawing our strength from God.

Paul was afflicted with some kind of disease, it appears from 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. What it was we do not know, though he called it "a thorn in my flesh" and recognized its source: "a messenger of Satan to torment me." Paul didn't sanctify his illness, even though God was using this evil thing, he asked for God to remove it. But God denied his request and instead told him, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." God used evil for good once again (Romans 8:28), so that Paul would remain humble and so that he would learn in his weakness to draw on God's strength. Paul learned to glory in it, "For when I am weak," he said, "then I am strong."

Deeply touched by HQ's and Ellson's prayers for me - both separately, yet they prayed the same prayer points for me.

God really loves me so much. Through these two dear brothers, these two great men of God. :)

And oh yes. When, after talking for so long, we were to go for the WFL lesson... I was still feeling too raw to go up for the lesson. So I told HQ I need to go somewhere else for a while, to think things over.

And HQ asked me, "Do you want me to accompany you?"

"Oh......... yes please."

And later on, God helped me see HQ through new eyes. Felt an increasing depth of appreciation for what he had done for me.

Perhaps God's starting another chapter in my heart's transformation. A heart of gratefulness.

I need to grow in gratefulness of heart. A grateful heart towards my parents. My friends. My colleagues. To God Himself. For all the things that He has given me. Love, life and liberty. Goodness, grace and greenery. Sweetness, songs and skies.

*pause*

********
And to remember that I reap what I sow. For all the hurtful words that I've sown, I reap distrust and pain.

But Ellson added: "And when you sow good seed, you reap a good harvest."

I guess it's going to be a long journey ahead. Still... I have a relationship with God Himself and I should be eternally grateful to Him for that! :)

Finally, to end off here... HQ said that he too went through the same kind of thing. That really encouraged me. He grew because he humbled himself and listened to the advice of some people who spoke into his life.

*thoughtful*

********
Thank God for Jon. :) He saw me milling around after WFL, and he came over. That was a very small thing, but I felt very, very touched. 'Cos it's a joy to know that your presence means something to someone else. :) So am learning, with God's help, to be more and more grateful for Jon's presence - not only as a sheep, but also as a friend and a bro in Christ. Haha... I know he's going to read this... well, here's a little passage to bless your heart bro! Philippians 1:3-8! :)

********
Haha. Yup. Sorry about the raw emotions here. But pray and hope it encourages anyone else too who might be struggling with certain weaknesses, disappointments, sins, etc... God is with you too, just as He is with me! :)

Living For Eternity

Just came back from the video production course. 3rd week. =) Today Steven taught us about using lighting to achieve various moods in filming. So cool.

Then had a good - no, a most excellent supper - with Weizhu. It's such a joy to get to know him more and more, even though we've been friends for many years. Hee. I guess these are the friendships that really strengthen and renew your heart... little brooks of God's tangible expressions of love that you come across day by day.

*******
And, Priority Living. Wow. Thank God. I think God is really speaking to me, debriefing me even, for the new phase of ministry that is to lie ahead. Ever since I came back from the missions trip in August, I just sense God's calling is becoming even clearer and clearer... more and more tangible... every step I take... He is my light and my salvation indeed.

And I just feel so... grateful. Kindness of a Saviour. I mean... *gosh* ...

Sorry, just feel rather overwhelmed at this moment.

I mean, Ps Jeff's altar call after sermon... was for those who want to be touched by God... to be USED by God...

And the sermon itself. Priority Living. It's a series that I've been really looking forward to. Because so many things have happened that made me think even more about my life and my death.

Maybe it was the accident on the last day of the missions trip. That made me think deeper about how suddenly life can go just like that. And that life is a sheer gift from God. "Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom."

Had also been reading Ecclesiastes. It made me think deeply about the result of a life lived for oneself... it's so true... you can be a believer in God, but if you don't live for Him... but choose to live like the rest of the world... you'll eventually find that everything you do is meaningless.

1 The words of the Teacher, son of David, king in Jerusalem:
2 "Meaningless! Meaningless!"
says the Teacher.
"Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless."

3 What does man gain from all his labor
at which he toils under the sun?

********
And the book of Ecclesiastes... one lesson that I took away was that no matter what work you do on earth... if it's for yourself... you are indeed a very miserable and pitiful man indeed.

Reading the books of Job and Ecc made me think deeply... one bro described Job as a book "full of complaining". In a way it's true... but it's one of the most powerful books I've read... Job's complaints are so real, so realistic, so full of emotion... and they ask one of the deepest and hardest to answer questions... "Why do good people suffer so badly?" and "If God is so good, why is there so much evil?" And why does God allow good people to suffer and bad people to go scot-free?

And I really really enjoyed reading the book. Wanted to read it over and over again. :) Hee. Oh man. I think this probably says quite a bit about what kind of person I am. :P

But yah. Reading Ecclesiastes, where Solomon had tried everything the world had to offer and groaned in the end, "Meaningless! Meaningless! Everything is meaningless!"

And contrast to Job... who lost all that he had, his children, and even his own health... and he didn't even have the comfort of knowing whether there was a life after death... but in the end he saw God... and in a way, I think God did hint to Job that one day, he would see his children in the life to come.

It's strange. Two men, both super-rich... one died rich, but said everything was meaningless... and found out the hard way that to fear God is to really live... but I sense a note of sadness in his final words... a note of failure and despair. And his son didn't do too well as the next king...

But Job died old and full of years after the terrible suffering he went through... at peace with God and with his family... and he grew in richness of character... of humility, generosity and forgiveness and so on... and most of all he now had experienced God first-hand...

*ponder*

Two men with very similar circumstances but very different outcomes... one chose faith in the world... and another chose faith in God.

*******

And reading the newspapers recently... about old people with dementia. To be honest, dementia's one of the diseases that I think I will really really really not want to get. Because you lose your mind... and worse still, it has a very disheartening effect on your loved ones.

And being an absent-minded and quite a slow-thinking fellow at times... I think I can understand a bit how the older people feel... that sense of frustration when they can't remember certain things.

But even if one day I do get it... I pray for mercy... I still want to love God with all my heart, all my soul, all my mind and all my strength. If I forget everything else, even memories of my most loved ones... then I pray that I will never forget three things: God's great love for me on the Cross, the Word of God and the hope of the new life to come.

In short, faith (the Word), hope (eternity) and love (the Cross). :)

It's possible to remember the Word of God, even when all your mind is gone. It is possible. Because there was this grandfather who had a stroke that robbed him of all linguistic capability. He totally lost the ability to understand language, both spoken and written. But... he never forgot the Psalms, because over his life, he had memorised and meditated on the Psalms so long that even when his mind totally failed him, he could still recite them. And I think they were the only words that could speak to him when human words could no longer reach him. Wow....

AND I REALLY WANT THAT KIND OF MEMORY. To let more and more of His Word be so deeply inscribed into my heart that even if my mind was totally gone, eaten away by Alzhemier's or amnesia... I'd still remember His Word always, and forever! I may forget my own name... but let me never, ever forget the beautiful name of Jesus - the Name that is above every other name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth...

:)
********

Hee. Morbid yah? No lah. We're all going to die one day, so the question is, how will you live today?

So I want to spend my life on what really counts. What really matters. What will carry over into the life to come. I don't want to be a safe ship in harbour. Because that's not what a ship's meant for. To live is Christ, to die is gain. If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord. So whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. :)

"He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain what he cannot lose."

Because eternal life doesn't start after death. It started from the day Christ came and gave me a brand-new life. And I don't want my dear Saviour to be ashamed of me on the day He returns. Yeah... :P

******

Oh other things being put together...
The book "When the Game is Over", the sermons, the Bible... various circumstances...
Hmm... all these seem to be pointing to one thing: Priority Living. To live fully for God.

I need to examine myself... to discard what hinders me from following God fully, and to consider carefully how I use my time and money for Him. To practise being more and more generous towards God and others.

Yup... yup... keep me in prayer yah? Tks! :)

I think God may be showing me more and more clearly that there's going to be a new phase of ministry. And while reading the Bible during my past few weeks of quiet time... I feel a increasingly stronger prompting from God that He really is at work in my life. Such kindness to me... a sinner! But God is so kind. :D Kindness of a Saviour.

Just feel that November is going to be the start of a very radical and exciting time of my life. :D I just feel the winds of change starting to blow in the air. I smell the fresh rain coming.

I think God has been putting into my heart that He's going to use me to impact even more children in due time, and to bear even more fruit for Him in the media ministry. I feel an increasing fire in my heart... must be the fire of the Holy Spirit increasing...

Consuming Fire, fan into flames
A passion for Your name
Spirit of God, would You fall in this place
Lord have Your way
Lord have Your way
With us

Come like a rushing wind
Clothe us with power from on high
Now set the captives free
Leave us abandoned to Your praise
Lord let Your glory fall
Lord let Your glory fall

And it's going to take a lot more sacrifice and dying to self... physical and mental tiredness... but October looks like a time of rest and renewal and studying the Bible, and plenty of time to just spend time seeking God. 'Cos work has been very much more relaxed... and will be relaxed till the end of this month. :D

Ha. Not sure what's going to happen next. But well, just keep on walking with Jesus...

Radical Love: Geylang

A dear friend wrote this... It left a lump in my throat as I read it. Instead of resting on a public holiday, this friend chose to minister to the prostitutes in Geylang. I'm... so... touched.

And I sensed God's love overflowing from this friend's sharing.

Although I had visited the clinic and knew the ministry there since abt 4 mths back, I had not mustered enough courage to "walk the streets" as they call it. To befriend, talk to and pray for the people.

The house church is located at Geylang Road, where they pray and meet daily. On Wednesdays, they have a worship time and then they walk the streets. After worshipping for abt an hr odd, we went to the street in 2 grps.

I went with a grp of about 8 to the "Indian" streets, unsure of what was to happen. We squeezed past crowds of migrant workers, walked past a street of gambling tables ( I swear I only saw those in HK TV dramas). Along the streets were rows of women standing/ sitting down. We came to a grp of ladies, and someone asked if they wanted prayer. They said yes, and another embraced one of them, and another held another's hand. And before long, we were all standing in the circle, in the middle of the dark dinky alley- Praying.

Jesus was there though. I felt like He was walking with us in the streets. He wasn't just there when we walked. He was there, walking with them daily.

I asked S if she wanted prayer. She hugged me and laid her head on my shoulders. I thought she didn't understand, and asked again. Again, she hugged me. I prayed for her- for healing, for God's love. And at the end of the prayer, I asked her to call to Jesus, to tell Jesus what is in her heart. Soon after she said she gotto go, as there was business coming. It stirred my heart with a mixture of feelings.

But I knew Jesus loved each one of these. The bible came alive as I read Isaiah that night when I got home- of healing broken hearts, of setting the captives free, of bringing light into the darkness. There it was, in the dark alleys, incarnate love. Jesus walked and fellowshipped with the tax collectors and the prostitutes on earth. Jesus came to die for these ones. God wants to redeem these lives, each woman created uniquely and beautifully in His image.

I have a feeling that this is how christianity is meant to be. Christianity, according to the bible, is radical.

Something I learnt from this: There are many, many people who are hungry for love... and God hears their hearts' cries. Let's be encouraged and allow the Lord to use you and me today... to minister to the least of these people... because Jesus said that whatever we did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of His, we ultimately did it for HIM.

Jesus will never ever forget what we have done for him, no matter how small it is. :)

Thank God for this dear friend, who is a wonderful radical of Christ. :) I wanna be radical for Him too. Because our God is a radical God!