The Heart of a Missionary

Hmm. Want to write down my reflections about the GoForth conference recently. But feeling so lazy. :P It's not good - the impressions and memories that I captured from the teachings are fast fading away. Aiyah! I should have journalled them down on the same day, when all the memories were strong and the impressions vivid.

But I shall write them down on my trip to Kenya.

:D

Anyway! GoForth... Xiaojia wrote down a very good and thought-provoking reflection on what she learnt from GoForth, which basically sums up what I'm feeling too (well, there are a few other things that I personally felt and learnt), but yeah. So I shall save time and link to her blog post again. Haha...

Innovations in Missions! It was so thought-provoking. Joseph and I were talking about it over the phone, and he shared with me that he teared when he read the Bible verse on the green metal mug that each delegate received as part of the goodie bag. "For I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink..."

And he commented that the person packing the mug must have prayed over the mug even as he/she was packing it. Then he said to me, "Yeu Ann, I think I'm going to pray over each seat in the auditorium tomorrow before service."

600+ seats in Nexus? That was one of my first thoughts when he said that.

Cool! So I joined him the next morning to pray over each seat. There he was, faithfully praying over each seat, and this is what he prayed for: God's life transformation for the person sitting there - whether the person sitting there is a believer or not yet one.

I went a-praying too, and to speed things up, I laid two hands on two seats. Good ol' Joe used one hand for one seat at a time. Haha... I think his reward in heaven will be double mine... :P LOL.

But it was indeed such a joy! And when we finished praying, I think we were physically and mentally tired out, but our souls were glowing on the inside. :D And praise and worship right after that was such a joy indeed! :D

So this is one fruit of the GoForth conference... and in a way, Joseph was doing missions there and then - sowing a seed faithfully, with love and care, in each seat... it really struck me very much that the heart of a missionary lies first and foremost in the HEART. That's essentially what Rev. Morley Lee said in the first night rally.

If you and I want to go forth for the Lord, we must first be willing to go forth in our hearts.

To be ready to go wherever He wants you and me to go. That means if He calls you to stay at home and serve unseen, praying for each seat in the auditorium, then that is your labour that God has given you, and you shall work at it with all your heart and joy and soul and strength.

There's this verse during the GF conference that really spoke to me a lot:

"I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow. The man who plants and the man who waters have one purpose, and each will be rewarded according to his own labor."

Talking about response to missions... I've responded too to the call. To be honest, it was a building-up. I was thinking whether to write down and submit the card on the second night already, but for some reason or another, I didn't yet. But the third night, I responded. And to be honest, I wasn't feeling much emotions about it.

Not that I don't care - it's that the emotions have already come and gone. And I told God that it doesn't matter how I feel about this decision - I've thought about it for a long, long time and prayed about it - so now it really is a rational and conscious decision to commit myself fully into His hands.

And it's so exciting, to hear His call and give my all.

:)

And the joy is even greater now. Joyce shared with me about her own decision to respond for missions on the second night. Something that I said to her struck me even as I said it (paraphrased):

"When you respond, God will prepare you... even to the point of breaking and humbling you. Like how He'll open up a teddy bear, pull all the stuffing out of it until it's totally emptied. And then He'll put His hand inside and work you like a puppet. And then you'll be so much more alive than you've ever been before, for it's no longer the old stuffing that lives within you, but Christ's hand working within you."

So what did God speak to me?

I think the one thing that He spoke to me so clearly was these words: "Consecrate yourself to Me. Seek Me." I believe He's speaking these words to me very strongly, because He wants me to know that even while I respond, I need to remember that apart from Him, I can do NOTHING. It is entirely God's work here.

And I see it coming to pass. Because in today's missions preparation meeting, I had planned for the children's orphanage programme. But very paiseh, the programme I planned was CMI - Cannot Make It. LOL. Was disappointed and felt insecure, to be honest, 'cos felt that what I'm doing is so little and insignificant. Shared this with Jason, and he told me that it's ok. Just as long as I've done my best. I can always learn if my work doesn't meet the team's standard. And if my work exceeds the team's standard, then I should be humble to teach what I am strong in to others. That way it's a win-win situation.

If I'm weak, I learn and I grow. If I'm strong, I teach and others grow.
Either way, we all grow together, 'cos we can always learn something from one another. Amen and hallelujah! :)

But if I allow insecurity to take over me, then it's a lose-lose situation. I allow myself to start dwelling in self-pity, and I am unable to learn from others as a result. It's a vicious cycle. Or if I do well and am proud, then it's a lose-lose situation. I don't learn and grow more, and others don't benefit from what I've already attained.

:D

Woah. It's so exciting. I think God will teach me more during the missions trip about humbling myself to learn and to grow. I am really less than the least of ALL God's people, and yet this grace was given to me: to preach to the lost the unsearchable riches of Christ! YES AND YES AND AMEN! :D

Thank God also that He's been showing me how all these life experiences are being weaved together - both the joys and the pains - into a beautiful tapestry of glory.

First the suffering, then the glory.

Oh how marvellous! Oh how wonderful!
And my song shall ever be:
Oh how marvellous! Oh how wonderful
Is my Saviour's love for me!

I AM SO FREAKIN' EXCITED. :D

Talking about excitement, Dr. Fernando was speaking during Saturday's plenary session on Innovations in Missions. He mentioned that we can also have fun serving God - e.g. playing soccer, etc. with the children we're reaching out to...

And so many other things to think about.

Oh yes. Think God indicated to me a clearer vision of what He has in mind for me regarding fulfilling the Great Commission. Certainly I do believe He's calling me to mobilizing people for missions, encouraging and helping people find and grow in their God-given roles in bringing Christ's love to the nations.

And I think He may be calling me not to one specific place, but to all the nations of the world. What I mean is that He may call me to go to this place for a few times in a few years, minister to the people there, and then shift to another place... Sounds very nomadic, yeah? But wherever He calls me to, I'll go!

Perhaps that might be His direction for me... well, I'm really not sure at this time. But yeah, where God calls me to go, I'll go. Just like Abram in the Old Testament. One of my personal heroes. I like the name Abraham! :) And Abraham Lincoln's another hero of mine too. Great beard too haha.

And my heart was so absolutely thrilled and enthralled by all the wonderful creative works that the media and IT ministries are doing... imagine! mobile internet... gosh! we can use this to share the gospel of Jesus Christ more and more powerfully across the nations... doesn't matter whether you're in the desert or in the jungle!

Oh yes. Before I end off, I just want to write down this verse that God impressed on my heart on the first day when I was praying after the first day of GoForth:

1 "Arise, shine, for your light has come,
and the glory of the LORD rises upon you.

2 See, darkness covers the earth
and thick darkness is over the peoples,
but the LORD rises upon you
and his glory appears over you.

3 Nations will come to your light,
and kings to the brightness of your dawn.

4 "Lift up your eyes and look about you:
All assemble and come to you;
your sons come from afar,
and your daughters are carried on the arm.

And the word shine just shone at me. :) I felt that God is impressing on my heart strongly that now is the time for me to arise and SHINE for Jesus, wherever I am. And how urgent the need is all the more for us, the people in the light, to shine as beacons of hope for those covered in darkness.

And it's so meaningful, because this verse was an answer to my sharing with God how inadequate and small I keep on feeling, when faced with the IMPOSSIBLE task that He has called us to.

He simply replied: "Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the GLORY OF THE LORD RISES UPON YOU."

It is always God's work, not ours. We are just His servants, His messengers, His instruments, His body to do His work on the earth.

Like how one of the speakers in the media workshop said, "We must remember that God calls us to an IMPOSSIBLE task. Remember, it is an IMPOSSIBLE task to reach the entire world for Christ. That is why we must remember to depend on God. Because only God, who calls us to an IMPOSSIBLE task, is able to do the IMPOSSIBLE."

We mustn't belittle the power of IMPOSSIBLE, for IMPOSSIBLE is always more powerful than POSSIBLE. But the Almighty God is more powerful than the IMPOSSIBLE, for He is able to take away the "IM" from "IMPOSSIBLE". Because "I AM" is the One who takes "IM" from "IMPOSSIBLE" to make "POSSIBLE"!

For nothing is impossible with God.

The Lord's Call Is So Stirring. My heart's really deeply moved... Here I am, Lord... send me! :D

GoForth Conference: Reflections

Haha... today was the last day of the Conference. Gosh. Thank God. It was good. Very very good. God really is showing me more and more clearly and specifically what my role in the Great Commission is. Impacting this young generation of children + media... gosh! I see the vision for my life that He showed me years ago increasingly coming to pass! And one day we'll see His Dream come to pass: The great multitude in heaven that no one can count, from every nation, tribe, people and language! :D Yeah!

I-Am-So-Freakingly-Excited!!!

Thank God also for people like Yufen, Marcus, Joyce, Clarence, Jason, Tracy, Xiaojia, etc, etc.... missions-minded people... it is indeed a great joy to be in the fellowship of like-minded bros and sisters... to extend the kingdom of God! Thank God also for Ps Ben who helped to chair and emcee the event... and for the wonderful servants of God who shared the Word and imparted their lives and spirits and passion and zeal...

And for the great lunch with Yufen: the sharing, testimonies and the ideas about how to grow the children's ministry... w00t!

Got to make a few new friends too! =) Eben (a brother from the Serving In Missions group) and this pastor from North India (I forgot his name... but Ps Ben took photo with him) and Tracy's colleague... (oh no! I forgot her name too...)

And 5 or 6 injections for the trip to Kenya. Ouch. To think Clarence was so nice, whacking me on my arms after that... oh. I did the same to Jason too. :P God is just indeed. Haha!

Very tired though, so I'll post some of my reflections and photos over the next few days.

GoForth Conference Day 1

Day 1:
0700: Was supposed to meet Clarence and Jason for an early 8 am breakfast at Marina Square Mac.

0750: Left the house. :P

0810: At the MRT, realised I'd forgotten to take my confirmation slip. Took cab back home and to Suntec.

0840: After a generous non-taxable donation of $22 to the SMRT Corporation (darned ERP....), I go to Suntec Convention Centre.

0845: Chaos!

Two queues diverged in a confused mood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the booth.
Not enough signs to point people the right way. The ushers were very helpful though. And happened to see Ps Ben there! :) We were both pleasantly surprised to see each other there. He quickly got up from his chair, and helped point confused me to the relevant personnel on duty. I was very touched by his small act of kindness. :D

Saw Xiaojia for the first time in the crowd. She's a penpal (or should that be email pal? haha), and I could identify her at once.

0905: Got my confirmation slip cleared and collected my goodie bag. Yay! Scrambled down to first level to meet Clarence. He blessed me with a Fillet-O-Fish and hot tea. His treat. Very blessed both in stomach and soul. :D

0915: Rushed to Room 201.


Specialist workshop: Tentmaking in a Globalized World.


w00t. An awesome workshop. :D

1235: Lunch with Peter, Sharon, Clarence and Tracy. Heard that Jason's workshop on ministering to HIV patients, the class went down to Tan Tock Seng Hospital to visit them. Sharon was so excited about the possibility of ministering to these patients, whereas Peter was enthusiastic about missions in the marketplace. Clarence and Tracy both went for Social Enterprise workshop. Xiaojia's boss gave a talk there, and she was there to help man the laptop (and lug it around too haha).

1350: Met up with XJ. Was very blessed by the encouraging time of sharing and chatting. :D

Then there's a whole lot more!

Like, I got to know this South African missionary - he's Eben, and his testimony is very inspiring. He went on his first missions trip when he was 15, and made a commitment to the Lord to go as a full-time missionary for him. So, upon graduation from high school, instead of taking the normal route of going to university like his peers, he chose to go straight to a missionary college. Whoa. It was not an easy journey for him, but he made this decision to honour God.

Oh yes. We found a common point: he's been to a lot of African nations on mission trips! :D His eyes glowed the instant I shared with him that I'm going on a missions trip to Africa next month. Haha. But really, very blessed by his simple heart for God and sincere simplicity of spirit. But one thing for sure - he's not simple-minded - he comes across to me as mature and sharp.

Anyway! Watch this Africa missions video by him and his wife:


Check out their blog too!

So encouraging!

Found some community care ministry booth outreaching to, among the nations, the poor Filipinos in slums. Bought a book as a gift for a friend.

Then the rally. Pictures worth 1000 words!




It was a very meaningful time. What Rev Morley Lee said was that the church in Singapore has been so blessed by God. But as the Lord himself said, "To whom much is given, much is required." So we must renew our hearts and spirits for God. God isn't so interested in the methods of missions, but much more interested in us becoming better men and women of God, whom He can use more fully.

Here's a pic of Yufen at one of the exhibition booths. It's on using media for missions. Was ab-so-lute-ly thrilled when I saw this opportunity!

From the pamphlet:

"Create International, a frontier missions communication ministry is committed to producing professional and innovative video resources to serve those working among the world's unreached people."

They make videos for the following purposes:

• Mobilisation
• Evangelistic
• Discipleship
• Music Video

I've signed up for their newsletter. So excited! I see this as a possible way of fulfilling one of my dreams I have for my Lord: to make a movie to impact peoples from all over the world. Hallelujah!

And Yufen was excited too - she said that hopefully she can do some art next time to bless the peoples too.

Ok, more updates for the next day!

Kenya Missions Trip Prayer Request #3

Important prayer need: A new complication has risen up. Pray for successful booking of tickets from South Africa to Kenya for 31 Jul (or 1 Aug) for the entire team.

From my team leader's latest email:

More bad news.

1. I still can’t purchase tickets from KQ (Kenya Airways). According to the banks, the transaction is not even going through to them. They suspect that KQ website is unable to link to Visa.
2. In the meantime, KQ’s flight details have changed:

1. Price has jumped USD30.
2. Flights out of Nairobi is no longer available at 07:45. Only flight out now is not in time for our SQ flight out of Jo’burg.


Options 1:
1. Change our trip from 7/31-8/9 to 8/1 – 8/10 (original dates). KQ flights for this date is still available at original price of USD580.
2. However there will be a fee for re-scheduling. I’m finding out how much tomorrow.
3. Will still need to find a way to book a ticket out of KQ website. I’m calling a Msian agency that sells KQ tomorrow. Maybe I’ll just buy it through them.

Option 2:
1. Fly SAA instead of KQ (their website might be more reliable).
2. However we’ll need a place to stay on the outward flight. I’ll contact Ps Henry abt this. May increase our accomadation.

I’ll continue to work out the options & update y’all accordingly.

Good Friends Are Like Stars

Kenya Missions Trip Prayer Request #2

Came back from the missions trip meeting. Gotta go for yellow fever jab and pop marvellous anti-malaria pills for 2 weeks. :D

We were discussing what gifts to bring for Lisa and Eng Chuan, our two church planters there. And gifts also for the people we'll be coming across in general.

Bak kwa, a Singapore map, knick-knacks...

To prepare the personal objectives by next Monday. And the orphanage's programme too. Haha. Got to know Gloria and Desmond and Jia Huey more on the way back home too. We bumped into Jia Dai as well. :)

And had a long chat with someone on MSN too. It's very encouraging - think it's a great blessing to know that others are also going through the same experiences as you. Which adds on to your courage to carry your own cross even more. Encouragement at its best!

Praise God truly! :D

Ok! Prayer request #2!
Pray for preparations to go smoothly. That passports don't get lost or our money stolen or lost by accident. That no flaming arrows from our bosses... for oil prices to remain stable. 'Cos we really need prayer support for the preparations phase. Prayer Power!

True Relevance

I find this passage by CS Lewis extremely meaningful. He crisply articulates the need to be excellent in all that we do - because we are Christians. Otherwise we merely serve to show non-Christians that we are IRRELEVANT to what they believe in - and only merely serve to reinforce their existing prejudices and stereotypes of "culture" and "religion" as irrelevant to their actual lives.

I realised something else after thinking through the passage. Lewis is - at the essence of it all - simply saying that our faith will only make people sit up and take notice, IF we actually live out what we profess to believe in.

And that is what true relevance is - the ability to show people that the gospel of Jesus Christ really has the power to change lives and save all who believe.


Just a thought: Some of us had started playing DOTA back in school days, because we sincerely wanted to be relevant to those who were playing DOTA (all the craze a few years back). But it seems now to be more an inward-looking indulgence for us, rather than an effective means of reaching out. (I'm one of the fellow DOTA players btw...) Also, the trend towards pubbing, clubbing, etc. that we saw among some Christians who sincerely wanted to relate with more kinds of people.

And another friend wrote in her blog some time back.
Thank God for her. :) She was able to put into words what I was feeling, but didn't know what or how to say. What a relief it is to know that you're not the only one with this view. :)

And finally, when I wrote to one of the leaders to share this concern, he replied wisely, "How can one be a good testimony in the marketplace if he doesn't have good character?"

(Thanks bro!) :)

So, after thinking about all this, I think true relevance is not so much about being "culturally relevant", doing the same things that the non-Christians do: e.g. clubbing, power-dressing, networking, entrepreneurship, BGR or LAN gaming or community work or this or that.

Actually, what is "relevance" about? In a Godbit Project interview, one of the interviewees said:

Over the last decade or so, the buzz in Christian subculture was all about being relevant. More young adult programs, churches predominantly comprised of twenty somethings, etc. Don’t get me wrong, I think that is all good. However, somewhere along the way, I think that several other relational aspects became neglected. I find it more of a rarity these days for younger men to rub shoulders with older men in the church.

Heck, I am very active in my church and a socialite at the core. Yet, I find myself having infrequent to zero interaction with those that have “been there and done that” on this journey of faith. Not that we are setting out to accomplish this immediately with ROOV, but I would love to hear of some relationships like this forming between those that have done and want to do something.

I think he's talking about discipleship. Being relevant is only one aspect (essential though it is). A godly character, with much wisdom, is bound to be much more influential.

The Lord Jesus knew perfectly well what He meant when He told us to come follow Him, and He will make us fishers of men.

Distorted Anger

From Dr. Gary Chapman's email newsletter on love languages:

DISTORTED ANGER
Satan has used many strategies to mischannel God’s intention for human anger. One of the most powerful is to make us think that all of our anger is of equal value; that is, that all of our anger is valid. Two kinds of anger exist: definitive and distorted. Definitive anger is born of wrongdoing. Someone treats us unfairly, lies about us or in some other way does us wrong. This is valid anger.
The second kind of anger, however, is not valid. It is triggered by a mere disappointment, an unfulfilled desire, a frustrated effort. No wrong was committed. This is distorted anger, and learning the difference between definitive and distorted anger is the first step in handling anger in a godly way.

Dirty Dishes
In distorted anger, a perceived wrong leads to the anger. Picture this. I eat dinner and leave for a meeting. I return three hours later to find the dirty dishes still on the table and my spouse on the couch watching TV. I am angry. Why? I perceive that they have been lazy, thoughtless, irresponsible. But If I pause and ask what happened that the dishes are still on the table, I may learn that my spouse has been sick and unable to wash the dishes. My anger is distorted.

Are You a Perfectionist?
Two questions are important in determining the validity of anger. The first is, “What wrong was committed?” The second is, “Am I sure I have all the facts?”
The perfectionist has high expectations not only for himself, but for others. When people do not live up to these expectations, he will often get angry. Such anger is distorted. Don’t allow your perfectionistic personality keep you angry with your spouse. Let your spouse be who he or she is - a little less than perfect.

Get the Facts
Often in marriage we get angry because something our spouse says or does embarrasses us. Something they fail to do irritates us. We start thinking, “I can’t depend on her for anything. She doesn’t love me. If she loved me, she would not let this happen.” When you are angry, think before you act. Make sure you have all of the facts, and pray for wisdom. You may discover that your anger is distorted.

There are five love languages. What's yours? Take the 30-second quiz.

Painful Experiences are Part of the Plan

From Painful Experiences are Part of the Plan by Kenny Luck:

God has lots of plans for our mistakes and weaknesses. It’s counterintuitive to most men to think that way because our style is to hide them. So for a man to accept his failures, losses, and struggles as part of who is (i.e., reality) versus things to be hidden away and not discussed is a big leap of faith. It’s even more risky to allow God to use those same things to serve other people. Yet that is exactly what my brother did.

God’s plan is to use the very things we want to keep a secret or keep hidden. In fact, one of the greatest things he wants to do is to bring us into the truth of reality to encourage others who are struggling with our same issues. “He comes alongside us when us when we go through hard times, and before you know it, he brings us alongside someone else who is going through hard times so that we can be there for that person just as God is there for us” (2 Corinthians. 1:4, MSG). So maybe instead of minimizing or trying to forget your struggles, failures, losses, temptations, or mistakes, let God use them! Instead of praying and asking God to take away your problems or past, ask God to do something with it.

2 Chronicles 16:9a
For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.

Thank God for this verse that I've been reading the past two days. It really encourages me these few days, especially when I feel more and more inadequate again. And I know that I will be tested again and again, be it during the missions trip, or at home, or in church, or in community, etc. etc.

But with God's help, I shall become myself. As long as my heart is fully committed to Him, He will find me, for His eyes are ranging to and fro throughout the earth.

It encourages me deeply, because the Bible reminds me that His delight is not in a man's natural strength, but in those who fear Him, who put their hope in His unfailing love. He will add on to me strength and capability for whatever He wants me to do. :)

Hee! Just like how I know I'm not a natural planner or organizer, but something I've experienced (and need to remember) in ministry is that when Christ calls me to do something, He also provides me with the wisdom and intelligence and skills needed for the task - as long as I continue to keep my confidence in Him.

I keep remembering how God anointed Joseph with wisdom (in the book of Genesis) for his work... I just find that when I choose to believe and claim what He's already promised in the Bible - His promises really come to pass. Not one of His promises have failed at all.

And I need to remember that, because the constant struggle in my heart is not easy. But it is good, because it makes me need to pray to God constantly, even minute by minute if necessary. Even in moments of melancholy. :) And He's so good - He knows what I need even when at times I can only whisper, "God, help me. God, help me please."

Touched. :) It helps that there is the Kenya missions trip to encourage me on towards whatever prize He's keeping in store for me at the end. Because it's part of His plan for me. Thank You Lord!

Wubi, the easiest way to Linux!

Wubi is an officially supported Ubuntu installer for Windows users that can bring you to the Linux world with a single click. Wubi allows you to install and uninstall Ubuntu as any other Windows application, in a simple and safe way. Are you curious about Linux and Ubuntu? Trying them out has never been easier!

Downloaded it overnight, and it pretty much set itself up. Configuration was a breezy breeze. :D So cool! Thank God, no more irritating partitioning, etc...

Kenya Missions Trip Prayer Request #1

Haha... Joyce says she will keep me in prayer during the missions trip. Really appreciate it, sis! We need all the prayer support we can get - especially for team unity, 'cos Satan really will do his utmost to disrupt unity among the missions team - because this is a good team with strong camaderie... and to Satan, unity in the Church is really one of his worst nightmares. So do keep us in prayer to stay strong and united, to give no opportunity for the evil one to gain any foothold. Spiritual warfare is extremely real... so lend us your prayer support even now! Please pray for us! Really! =)

(I like to think of prayer as spiritual "artillery" haha... but the power of prayer is indeed as real as physical artillery when it comes to spiritual warfare. Amen.)

So calling for prayer support! Just lay hands on the monitor and pray a 30-second prayer! Fire at will!

Tactical Prayer Support Request #1
Pray for God's continued providence and that no disruption disrupts our leave application... especially from work and family. Pray that the political situation in Kenya remains stable. Pray for ticket prices to FALL to $2.0K. Pray for sustained good health. Pray for everyone in the missions team to start praying for themselves too. Pray for increasing joy and conviction of why we are going on this missions trip... Pray for the GoForth conference to bless everyone who goes for it! Thank God for you!

Went to De Coders Cafe with Edmund yesterday after work. Played a fun game of Mr. Jack with him. And thank God too for the good chat getting to know the owners of the cafe better. Hee. Ed had a good time too!

Thank God the system testing for my software component went well, and especially that all the functionalities are there - with complete passes! Praise God for His help indeed!

And thank God for the refreshing meetup with Jason and Clarence, and for the time with Jonathan today too. :D And! thank God so much for the bumping into Joyce at City Hall... we shared with each other what's going on in our lives, and especially how God has been guiding us to serve Him more in missions! We were so excited! And she shared with me how God has been leading her, sustaining in her heart the vision that He'd given her... whoa, that really encouraged me too, 'cos I was also so deeply touched by how God is faithfully bringing the vision He's given me to come to pass. It really is totally God's work in my life... how great a joy it is to throw yourself completely into His everlasting arms, and find that He's planned for you what He made you to do... your heart will leap for joy when He shows you what He's designed you to BE and to DO! Yeah! *pumps fist exuberantly*

Something she shared with me reminded me a lot: Whether you are a student or a working adult or a parent, the Great Commission is for YOU! Begin here in Singapore and stretch to the ends of the earth! Amen!

Kenya! :D Haha... I've paid for my ticket... next meeting on Monday... gosh. Excited! :D

Preparations for Kenya Mission Trip... and a Testimony of How God is Fulfilling His Plan For Me!

Came back from the Love(R) Africa meeting. It's so exciting! :D Haha... so this is how a missions preparation meeting looks like... the slow and steady buildup, the planning and re-planning, coordinating, fixing a common departure and return date, appointing the various team members to be charge of this and that... to quote Jonathan: whoa~oh~oh (~oh)

Hmm. Personally I feel very excited because this is more than a short-term missions trip for me - it's also an episode in my life where I can see the guiding hand of the Lord working powerfully in the lives of me and my team-mates as we prepare to set off to Kenya.

Like how God miraculously provided me with the big bonus - which turns out to be just enough to meet my needs for the missions trip AND to save enough money for a new hearing aid! Papa really knows all my needs even before I ask!

And not just so - I'm almost out of leave already due to attending various church retreats and conferences, but even then, God is miraculously providing for me...

In response to my prayer today for God to supply my need for leave, my manager graciously gave me 2 days off to take, which I can use for the GoForth conference, which means I can save the leave that would have been used for the GoForth conference to go for the missions trip instead!

WHOA~OH~OH!

All praise and glory and wisdom and thanks and honour and power and strength be to our God, forever and ever! Amen!

Oh it's so true - I'm living life on the fine line, but I am learning all the more the great trueness of these verses: "Give us today our daily bread", and the sheer exuberant joy of this verse: "And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work!"

There is simply so much joy when you see how God is able to provide so extravagantly for you in EVERY SINGLE WAY! His grace knows no bound, His goodness knows no end, and His generosity knows no limit! THANK GOD INDEED! :D

Just so happy to see how GOOD GOD IS! Life may not be comfortable, life may be on the thin red line, BUT ONE THING FOR SURE: LIFE IS WORTH THE LIVING, JUST BECAUSE HE LIVES!

Time and money we worry about, but oh, age to age He stands,
And time is in His hand
Beginning and the end,
Beginning and the end...
HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD
SING WITH ME
AND ALL WILL SEE
HOW GREAT
HOW GREAT IS OUR GOD...

Pardon me for typing in all caps... but I'm simply so filled with joy that I can't help myself! HALLELUJAH! :D

:D

Thank You Jesus!

*breathes deeply*

I'm just so happy. Because, there is something else to all this that makes this trip so precious.

Because I'm in charge of organizing the programme for the orphanage that we'll be going to visit.

And you know what? There are about 30+ children there who are 6 years or below.

It struck me as so amazing, because in HopeTots, I help to handle 30+ children who are 6 years and below. It's almost as though God were preparing me for this very mission... the coincidence is simply amazing. And whenever I hear about the orphanage, my heart literally beats faster. I am simply so looking forward to being with the children!

And even more wonderful is that I see how the vision that God showed me back in 2005 is visibly coming to pass! A vision of me sitting on a chair, and telling children from all over the world the story of Jesus... :D

It just touches my heart so deeply. For the Lord promised that He knows the plans that He has for me, plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me hope and a future! :D And THEN I will call upon Him and come and pray to Him and He will listen to me! Whoa... can there be such love as this?

I believe You'll always lead me
All my days have been ordained for me
All Your thoughts toward me are holy
Full of love and grace...

Surely I was born for such a time as this.

To think that He planned all these things for me even before I started looking for Him. Who can care so much for you or me, like Jesus does? In fact, He planned all these wonderful things for you and me... long before the beginning of Time.

Thank God for Alan, who shared Ephesians 1 with us so many years ago, about the richness of God's plans and purposes for us... and he made us memorise and meditate on the entire chapter.

And that chapter struck me so deeply there and then, because for the first time, it struck me that God not only wants to save the world - He wants to rope you and me in too to be his fellow partners in saving the world. He calls us to be His fellow agents ala Get SMART: "Saving the world... and loving it!"

And the delight of all this is that I know what the meaning of my life is, I know what I'm on earth for, and I know the hope that He has called me to. He has given me the name Abraham, even though I'm still so far from being a mature and wise man of God... because He sees in me the potential to be a father of many nations. Whoa! Jesus really sees through all my brokennesses and weaknesses and fraility and fallenness... and He makes me grow!

I've found where I belong
I'm a living stone
In this house I will grow...

:D

I have a destiny I know I shall fulfill
I have a destiny in that city on a hill
I have a destiny, it's not an empty wish
For I know that I was born for such a time as this...

---

I also commented to Jason as I was walking back with him, how at the church camp back in 2002, at Winsfield House about that night, when he and I were sitting at a stone table at 2.30 in the morning. A cool, breezy moonlit nite. :)

We were sharing with each other about our dreams to go on missions for the Lord. Fast forward six years later, and it turns out that by God's wonderful grace, we are going on the same missions trip together to Kenya.

Even though both of us didn't get to go to where we'd originally planned... God took us by our hands and led us to where He wants us to go. I'm just marvelling at the sheer intricate design of the Master Weaver's plans.

The Master Weaver. Ravi Zacharias wrote a book on that. I should go down one day to Tecman and buy a copy.

:D Joy.

Organ Trading

Read the on-going debate in the Straits Times. Personally, I think it's permissible, but it's a very thin line indeed. In the long run, it's not beneficial to allow people to sell their organs. And I think Minister Khaw must have thought through carefully, when he said that the law was "crystal clear". Everything may be permissible, but not everything is beneficial.

1. The main argument for allowing organ trading is that it saves lives. But consider the poll in the Straits Time: Almost everyone wants to buy an organ if they need one, but almost none are willing to sell theirs. This indicates, that deep down, nobody wants to sell, unless they REALLY have to do so.

So, we need to ask: What would make people desperate enough to sell their precious organs? Secondly, how did they get into that dire situation in the first place?

If a person is so poor that he/she has to sell his/her spare kidney... or do a risky operation to sell part of the liver... then we need to address the very situation that caused that situation. Poverty. Which is frankly a tractable problem in the first place.

In short: No one should ever have to sell his/her organs to alleviate his/her poverty.

2. But then, what about the receiver? Anyone, when dying for want of a good organ, would be willing to pay almost any price possible to save his/her own life. To be real, it is a very difficult issue that has no easy measure. However, we can at least ensure that it is fair - both to the rich and the poor. If the rich are able to jump ahead of the poor in the wait for transplants, then what can the poor do but wait even longer?

At least, at this present time in our society - when it comes to this aspect of medicine - we are all equally needy. Organ failure is bad enough - let's not make it worse.

3. Finally, how do we prevent rip-offs from happening? And how do we prevent exploitations, scams and even murders to harvest organs from happening?

The short answer is: It's not possible. Not unless we have a blanket ban on organ-selling. Minister Khaw is right on this point.

In conclusion, people have been arguing for the easier way of allowing organ-selling. But shall we take the harder right, or the easier wrong? Let's choose the better way (even though it is harder) of encouraging and helping people to sign their organs up for donation after death. As a Christian, I believe such generosity is bound to be remembered and graciously rewarded by God in the life to come... :)

Everyone's going to die, sooner or later. So why not leave your organs behind, so that others may live and not leave?

Personally... I'm thankful for the HOTA. I'm opting in for sure, not opting out. :)

Prayed at MacRitchie Reservoir last night. Serenely dark and beautiful. Thank God for the time truly. Just poured out to God all my worries and everything that was on my mind... then apologised to Him, saying, "Sorry Lord, I think I'm talking too much here... I ought to be listening to You, to let You get a word in."

But 1 Peter 5:7 instantly came to mind: "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

Whoa. So touched by God's care, that the Lord of all the universe would actually take time to stoop down to listen to a worried child's ramblings. :)

And you know, something very interesting happened too. While I was praying, I looked up at the night sky, and I saw the clouds... gosh, it looked a lot like a face... a big gentle face, sorta like Michaelangelo's Sistine Chapel (but a lot less stern haha)... and it looked a lot like it was smiling at me. And the rest of the clouds looked like a huge arm encircling me. Really. I spun around and saw the extent of the clouds.

And at that moment, to be honest, I was quite scared. What if it REALLY was God appearing to me... you know, like how He appeared to the Israelites in a cloud in the Old Testament? I was scared, because the "face" really did look so real... and HUGE.

Think I got a tiny taste of how the people in the Old Testament must have felt, seeing the glory of the Lord coming down in a cloud. It struck me then that when God really wanted to connect with us... He chose no longer to come down in a terrifying cloud of power, but as a frail baby. To paraphrase John Donne, "Immensity clothed in dear flesh..."

Revelation 1:7
Look, he is coming with the clouds,
and every eye will see him,
even those who pierced him;
and all the peoples of the earth will mourn because of him. So shall it be! Amen.

But so touched by His realness and His love... who am I, that the Lord of heaven and earth would care for a little worm like me? "What is man, that You are mindful of him, the son of man that You care for him?"

I'm very refreshed and renewed by that time of prayer. It was long, and I struggled at the start, taking a nap even... but it was worth it. Because I think I managed to see the face of God for just even a very little, little moment. :) So... I'm inspired to sleep earlier tonight to wake up earlier tomorrow... just to seek Him even more.

Jesus is just so, so good... He is sweeter than the sweetest honey that you've ever tasted. And no, these words are not mushy sentimental words of an emo fellow... they are lifted right up from the very Bible itself. For the mighty warrior King David exclaimed, "O taste and see that the Lord is good! For He taste like honey, sweet honey in the rock." :D w00t!

"You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown!"

Came across these YouTube videos from a friend's blog... oh gosh! The songs are simply lovely... and "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown"? Oh man! I remember watching it on a holiday so long ago... I think was it 1986 or 87? Miss it lots... they simply don't make children's videos like they used to... even Transformers the Movie was cool... with quoteworthy sound-bites. :) "Such heroic nonsense!"

Opening to "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown!"

[CHARLIE BROWN (overlapping)]
Some days I wake up early to watch the sunrise, and
I think how beautiful it is, and how my life lies
before me, and I get a very positive feeling about
things. Like this morning for instance; the sky's
so clear and the sun's so bright. How can anything
go wrong on a day like this?

I'm late!

[SNOOPY]
Woof!

[ALL (except Charlie Brown)]
You're a good man, Charlie Brown
You're the kind of reminder we need
You have humility, nobility and a sense of honor that is very
Rare indeed.

[SNOOPY]
Woof!

[OTHERS]
You're a good man, CHarlie Brown
And we know you will go very far

Yes it's hard to believe
Almost frightening to conceive
What a good man you are.

[SCHROEDER]
You are kind.

[OTHERS]
You are kind to all the animals
And every little bird
With a heart of gold
You believe what you're told...

[LUCY]
Every single solitary word

[OTHERS]
You bravely face adversity
You're cheerful through the day
You're thoughtful
Brave and couteous

[LUCY]
And you also have some faults
But for the moment let's just say

[OTHERS]
That you're a good man, Charlie Brown
You're a prince
And a prince could be king
With a heart such as yours
You could open any doors
You could go out and do anything
You could be King Charlie Brown
You could be king!

"Glee Club Rehearsal" ("You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown!")


"Happiness" from "You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown!"

I love the opening bars... and this song is very meaningful. :) It made me smile deep inside... yeah :) I think that's the sweet beauty of a simple childlike faith... to know that no matter how mundane or sad or disappointing or dreadful life can ever be... this is the day that the Lord has made, we shall rejoice and be glad in it. :)

Kranji Farm Visit Redux

Psalm 104:24
How many are your works, O LORD! In wisdom you made them all; the earth is full of your creatures.

Was browsing through some pics, and came across some photos that I took at a Kranji farm. Thought they're very nice, so just to share with you all. (I ought put 'em on Flickr soon...)

Boardgaming at Cafe Decoder

Had combined CG today with Sarah's CG joining us. Cafe De Coder. I met an old coursemate from NUS there - Hock Soon. :) It was really great catching up with him. Got to know a new friend - Edmund's old JC friend. (Can't rmb her name tho.) Some of us played Pictionary. Edmund's really good at this... and Peter has this knack for recognizing even the most mysterious scrawlings. Tai Heng can be really steady under tight time pressures... haha, while Sarah can make up new game rules on the fly! :)

Anyway, pics!

True Relevance

Weizhu and I had been discussing about this over our dinner a few days ago. Shall blog more on it asap... this is to jot down the points that we talked about.

Had dinner with Yufen and Kin Wee today, to treat them as an appreciation for all their help with the HopeKids video for the HopeKids camp some time back. :) Shunrong couldn't make it though - work commitments.

So when I reached Pizza Hut at Plaza Singapura today, to my surprise, I saw Huili there! Seems that she was catching up with Yufen earlier... so we cajoled her into joining us for the dinner treat. :) Haha. We were joking that she was the stand-in for Shunrong...

Anyway, it was a lovely time - very funny too - of sharing and talking. Really, Huili and Kin Wee are great jokers. :D HL'll be going for her convocation next Thursday. Thank God it's around 8 pm, so shall go down to bless her. (I gotta check with the other people graduating this sem.)

Minchen popped by later. We tried to get her to chow some food, but she had just eaten at Han's Restaurant earlier with her CG. And she was sporting a nice tan from the matric camp last week. :P Haha...

All in all, such a good time. =) Very refreshed, very blessed by this time of fellowship. And thank God also for the very encouraging testimony by Yufen back on the train. Always never fail to be refreshed after a good chat with her! Just to jot down this little thing that she shared with me: "God will never put us in a place His grace cannot reach."

Ok. Time to sleep now... GoForth conference coming up, excited... and prayerfully, can go for the missions trip... (YEAH!)

---

Oh yes! Want to thank God too for His wonderful help in finishing almost all my project stuff on / ahead of time. =D And for the sweet quiet time in the morning, spent at the rooftop garden in the golden morning sunlight.

"Early in the morning I will seek Your face
Drawn by the Spirit to the promise of Your grace..."

But still there is so much of my heart that still doesn't desire Him that much... and also I want to grow in talking with Him as a FRIEND, not just as a Cosmic Problem-Solver.

I want to walk with You
Every day of my life
To talk with You
In the good and the strife
You're my Friend
You're my Father
For all time
Nothing can keep us apart
You're the Lover of my heart...

In the good and the strife. How I want to call upon Him, not only like a desperate soldier calling for fire support, but now also as a friend, to share deeply with Father my deepest desires, my innermost thoughts, my sweetest feelings and my darkest secrets. I want to let God be MY God.

Freedom comes, when I call You Lord
You are Lord, MY God...

Thank God too, for how He mercifully heard my prayer this morning, when I was tired and tense, and irritable. Felt like snapping at others, but even while in the midst of talking, the Holy Spirit reminded me of the need for self-control, to control my tongue...

And I prayed to God to help me hold my tongue, to exercise self-control, not to give in to my frustrations. And the Lord heard my prayer. :) Daily He sanctifies me, daily He gives me bread for my soul, and daily He teaches me His ways and guides me in His truth.

It's a period, as I shared with Yufen on the trip back on the MRT, where I think I see how the Master Potter is preparing me for whatever He's calling me to. First it was the awakening of my eyes to see the need for sanctification, for character, for godliness, for holiness, for righteousness. And how He opens my eyes day by day to see my LACK of these all... so that I may open wide my mouth to ask Him to teach me and fill me... and how He uses the people in my church to help me mature and grow to be the man that He wants me to be.

Maybe I'm imagining things too much here, but as Ruey Fong exhorted me some time ago, God has given me a very powerful imagination, and I need to use it to imagine great things for God, not imagine bad or sad things. Amen.

I sense this year may be the beginning of deployment, mobilization to the frontlines... this would then be the year of PREPARATION. Consecration, in other words. "Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will do amazing things among you." :)

Take my life, and let it be
Consecrated, Lord, to Thee
Take my moments and my days
Let them flow in ceaseless praise
Take my hands, and let them move
At the impulse of Thy love
Take my feet, and let them be
Swift and beautiful for Thee

Take my voice, and let me sing always, only, for my King
Take my lips, and let them be filled with messages from Thee
Take my silver and my gold; not a mite would I withhold
Take my intellect, and use every power as Thou shalt choose

Take my will, and make it Thine; it shall be no longer mine.
Take my heart, it is Thine own; it shall be Thy royal throne.
Take my love, my Lord, I pour at Thy feet its treasure store.
Take myself, and I will be ever, only, all for Thee.

*touched*

It touches me that the Lord is inviting you and me to join Him together in fulfilling the Great Commission in OUR lifetimes...

A Blog by Two Friends

Do check out Song of Songz... the music and lyrics are l o v e l y! :D

Songs written and composed by Calyn Yim
Sung by Guan Rui
Hope Church Singapore
National University of Singapore

Pray that everyone who visits this blog will be blessed by the songs and that you will be ministered by them, capturing God's vision and His heartbeat for the world and for you.

Learning to See Myself

Putting it very practically, I'm learning to see myself using the metaphors and similes the Scriptures use.

Learning to see myself as dust.
Learning to see myself as a small little worm.
Learning to see myself as a jar of clay.
Learning to see myself as a sheep.
Learning to see myself as a little child of God.
Learning to see myself as a beloved.
Learning to see myself as an athlete.
Learning to see myself as a living stone.
Learning to see myself as a stranger, an alien in this world.
Learning to see myself as a grain of salt, a bright shining lamp.
Learning to see myself as a courageous soldier fervently fighting evil forces.
Learning to see myself as an ambassador to all nations.
Learning to see myself as a slave of all.
Learning to see myself as a free man of Christ.
Learning to see myself as a super-conqueror.
Learning to see myself as a captive for the faith.
Learning to see myself as a redeemed creature in eternity to come.

And I'm learning to see myself imitating these people of faith.
Learning to see myself setting out for an unknown land, like Abraham.
Learning to see myself letting Father have his way with me, like Isaac.
Learning to see myself wrestling with God, like Jacob.
Learning to see myself working hard and smart, like Joseph.
Learning to see myself speaking up courageously, like Judah.
Learning to see myself speaking with God, like Moses.
Learning to see myself fighting huge armies and fording rivers, like Joshua.
Learning to see myself standing up to giants, like David.
Learning to see myself thinking wisely, like Solomon.
Learning to see myself exercising signs and wonders, like Elijah.

Learning to see myself preaching like Peter.
Learning to see myself teaching like Paul.
Learning to see myself evangelising like Philips.
Learning to see myself speaking like Apollos.
Learning to see myself praying like Epaphras.
Learning to see myself reading like the Ethiopian eunuch.
Learning to see myself writing like Luke.
Learning to see myself dying like Stephen.
Learning to see myself encouraging like Barnabas.
Learning to see myself believing like Cornelius.
Learning to see myself sitting and listening like Mary.
Learning to see myself serving like Martha.
Learning to see myself caring like Dorcas.
Learning to see myself searching like Onesiphorus.
Learning to see myself forgiving like Philemon.
Learning to see myself tent-making like Priscilla and Aquila.

And the list goes on.

Still learning to see myself more like how He sees me.
So that I can learn to see others like how He sees them.

Isn't He wonderful indeed? :D

Wonderful, wonderful, Jesus is to me
Counsellor, Prince of Peace
Mighty God is He
Saving me, keeping me from all sin and shame
Wonderful is my Redeemer, praise His mighty name!

My True Identities

Gosh, struggling with melancholy again. Still feeling a certain kind of longing inside. And considering the damage that I've done in my moments of insecurity, when I grabbed and clung.

But somehow have this feeling - maybe it's an impression from God? - that now that He's shown me this truth about myself here, He has also been actively working in my heart, enabling me to overcome, bit by bit, the insecurity in my heart. Learning to be self-controlled, learning to let go of my desires.

Like how I'm learning to be more patient in building relationships - especially those relationships that I think God wants to specially bless me with. 'Cos was observing myself, and I realised that I'm somehow learning to ... what's the word... just be myself with other people.

:) Hee. It's crazy, but as Soren Kierkegaard put it so well, "And now, with God's help, I shall become myself."

I don't have to do crazy things for others to accept me. I don't need to be so super-sweet to make others appreciate me. I don't need to be so friendly to win people over. I just need to be the Yeu Ann that Jesus wants me to be.

I guess it's full-circle here of sorts? Learning the truth about myself... and then learning to accept the truth about myself. And with God's help, learning to embrace the truth about myself, so that one day, God can work thru me to minister to others who are struggling with the same kinds of struggles that I've gone through before.

'Cos in all my years of insecurity, I found that I tend to imitate certain people I admire. (Of course, we all do.) It's just that sometimes I think I took it to extremes.

:)

Gosh. Feel paiseh to write that down! Never mind lah. You've been through that too, right? ;)

Don't know how to give any specific methods for overcoming insecurity in one's life... But I guess there's one sure way...

Walk with Him, every day of your life. Talk with Him, in the good and the strife. When you finally get it in your heart and mind that the Father loves you unconditionally, accepted you just as you are... and not just so, wants to prune and mould you fully... yeah! it's a growing process indeed.

Sorry, don't know how to put into words here already. It's a very experiential thing, having the Spirit work in your life. And the funny thing is, I feel decidedly unspiritual at times. :) But perhaps that simply shows Who is in charge... it's not my spirit, but His Spirit in me. Yeah. Don't want to be so spiritual until even the Holy Spirit himself cannot find me! :P But want to grow, even if it's slow.

:) Thank God truly.

Met with Edmund over dinner at AMK. We met a financial consultant from Philips Finance (I think that's the name). Edmund really can ask a lot of questions - in fact he was jotting down in his PDA questions that he was thinking of, before he met the consultant.

Anyway, listened to what the savings plans are available. There's one very attractive savings plan that has a 4% interest rate. Only thing is that you have to commit to chipping in about $200 every month for a number of years (up to a max. of 25 years).

Ed then asked a good question: "What about flexibility? 'cos in the next few years I may want to go do volunteer work in another country, and I may not be able to put in the necessary money."

So that made me think. What is God's plan for me here? If He wants me to go to another country, say Africa, and stay there for a few years... then I may have to live on my savings.

In short, I'd have to go the opposite way of financial independence, and really have to depend on God to provide for me, in one way or another. Yet on the other hand, I'll also have to consider to what extent is it possible to plan for my future financially. As Ed later put it, "When you become a working adult, you really have so many decisions to make."

Yes, that's so true. But one joy about it all, is that, uf Jesus calls us to follow him one day to be fishers of men, we're free to leave our nets behind.

Still thinking about what is needed.

Passing the Flame On

I met Weizhu for dinner yesterday, and to our pleasant surprise, we bumped into Calyn and Guanrui. They were going to St. Andrew's Cathedral to find a nice quiet place to record a song. =D Weizhu instantly took them under his 'wings', listening to their songs (Calyn guitar+lyrics, Guanrui vocals) and giving them sagely advice. =)

So heartwarming! I was sitting there, just listening, when I heard one very beautiful song... I asked Calyn whether that was a Corrinne May song. Gosh. Turns out Cal wrote the lyrics herself. Haha!

But honestly, Cal really has talent in songwriting. And thank God for Guanrui who shares the same passion as her - together they are blessing the kingdom of God, and the church, with their eager desire to use their holiday times to write beautiful songs for God! :D

It's so encouraging. Weizhu, Huichun and Sijia, during their time in the NUS ministry, had the desire to start a music ministry in the NUS group. It didn't come to fruition after all, but God was at work behind it all... 'cos WZ, HC and Jia all honed their musical skills faithfully.

And a "generation" later, I saw Weizhu, with the wealth of skill, wisdom and experience, teaching and imparting to Cal and Guanrui. What a joy it is to see how the gift of God's flame is being passed down from one generation to another!

I'm reminded at this point here of this passage that WZ shared with me right after his quiet time back three years ago:

Psalm 48
12 Walk about Zion, go around her,
count her towers,
13 consider well her ramparts,
view her citadels,
that you may tell of them to the next generation.
14 For this God is our God for ever and ever;
he will be our guide even to the end.

Amen indeed. :)

I saw this on Xinying's blog - very meaningful. :)

3:16 AM
I have a fussy kitten on my hands.
lol.
After feeding him with tuna and other delicacies (e.g. aloe vera, salmon, chicken) for two weeks or so, he's now fussing over his food and decides to abandon the dry biscuit form for normal kittens.
I guess that's why sometimes it's not good to indulge your pet. Probably works the same for human beings as well. Pamper too much and they get uncomfortable with discipline. Let them run loose and they think they know everything. Pride comes in. Self-centeredness comes in. And then they start to think they have the right to feel that way, forgetting how from the start it was never their right in the first place. That from the start they have been a stray, and it was only because of grace given that they can have what they have today.
Thankfulness ah. It's an important thing for all of us to have.
Even for cats:)

Was telling Justin today during the 5 min technical break for team coaches course that we stole their leader. haha. Justin's remark actually opened a perspective that I haven't really been considering much.
He very honestly and sincerely said something along the lines of "ya lor. can feel their absence greatly in the CG..."
Perhaps along the way, even as the people who're moving on to YP group learn to adjust to the new environment, this group of people may have forgotten that there are three other people are adjusting to this new environment too. That's it's not just us who are dealing with changes, it's not just us learning to be open to new ideas or new things coming our way, it's not just us who are vulnerable at this stage of transition as well.
And it's certainly not just us who're missing their original caregroup, or the friends they have in the ministry before this.
Everyone is adjusting. And everyone has people who miss them. Everyone has people whom they miss.
I think it's a small reminder to me (and hopefully to whoever reads this) that in times of transition when we tend to be more self-centered and tend to be more inward looking, waiting to see how people can meet our needs (sometimes having that inward misunderstanding that people should meet our needs), hopefully we will not forget that everyone is going through transition at this moment as well.
Let's take care of each other together.

Just To Share...

I went for Love Africa Missions meeting today :) It was very exciting, 'cos we were discussing our plans for the upcoming Kenya missions trip.

I think God may be impressing on my heart that He wants me to go for this missions trip. And looking at the circumstances, I think He may be opening the doors. A good bonus to pay for the trip, just enough days' leave to apply for the missions trip, and one or two other things.

I think, but better confirm in more prayer and checking with some brothers. But still, I'm quite confident that this is His will - esp since Matthew 28:18-20 is the Lord's general command to Christians everywhere: to take the Gospel to the uttermost ends of the earth. AMEN and Hallelujah!

Plus, I must confess, I think this will be a boasting point for me to my colleagues... "let him who boast boast in the Lord" - that instead of buying a car, or some unit fund or what, I am willing to make the "foolish" purchase of an air-ticket to Africa. It may be foolish in the eyes of my non-Christian friends, and perhaps even some Christians too.

But these words of Jim Elliot inspire me: "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep, to gain what he cannot lose." I hope that perhaps this may be an opportunity to witness to my colleagues the reason why I am planning to "splurge" my bonus on a missions trip.

Still, nothing's fixed yet. Maybe God'll give the go-ahead, maybe He'll ask me to not go, but sponsor someone else instead, or to hold back first, etc. Whatever, as long as it pleases my Lord. Maybe He would rather that I save the $ for a nice wedding angpow to bless some newlywed couple in time... :) Who knows?

Proverbs 19:21
Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails.

Amen, w00t and hallelujah! :D

Hmm! I'm not sure what's going to happen next. Oil prices are raising the price of the air-tickets to a critical limit. Dear friend, if you're a Christian, please keep us in prayer, for God's provision even in this time of crisis. And if you're not a Christian, well, pray to God that oil prices and food prices fall anyway! :) It'll be good for everyone on this planet... honest!