Monday, February 8, 2010

A Romance in Search

Peter Truong's prayer+prophecy session with HopeKids Core Team (16 Nov 2008)


(I'm writing this down as a reminder to myself of God's promises and faithfulness. Thanks Jon for encouraging me during our last shepherding session from the book of Joshua that not one of the Lord's promises has failed. I'm really am encouraged to see how God is using you to use the Bible to encourage me! =D keep growing in the Word and in prayer, dear sheep... I believe you've great potential to be a great teacher of the Word next time... if you keep reading and putting in the effort to study God's Word faithfully. May God use you even more wonderfully in years to come!)

Peter Truoung’s session with Hopekids Core Team
Date: 16 Nov 2008
Time: 2pm
Venue: Asia Room, Nexus

Word for Yu Ann:

From Peter Truong:

  • God will use you as a man after God’s heart
  • You are a man who desires to please God
  • Continue to serve Him – you will have big impact
  • Avail yourself
  • God has more in store for you as you are faithful in the small things
  • Do not despise the small beginnings
  • God will train and equip you. Keep close to God

From Hong Teck:
  • Continue to look to him.
  • God has a great purpose for you.
  • Do not look at your shortfalls, your handicaps – look for God’s purpose
  • Your story will be an encouragement to many
  • What you have is good – continue to persevere and hold on to it.
  • You will be like a small seed which grows into a big tree
  • Don’t depend on yourself
  • Take one step forward each day

Two Sweet Tweets!

Wow. How timely these two tweets are. Right after my blog post below. I know God is encouraging me to persevere on... yes, Jesus loves me, this I know! :D

These two tweets are very precise encouragements, because of a prophecy prayed over me back in Nov 2008. Gosh.


The Blind Side

Proverbs 25:12
Like an earring of gold or an ornament of fine gold is a wise man's rebuke to a listening ear.

Galvatron says (12:01 AM):
in general.when things don't go to your expectation..u start poking things for faults here n there
either anaylsing things at a angle only u can seek
usually overlook the other party's reason n overlooking the overall picture

[yeu@nn] says (12:03 AM):
wow
tks bro

Galvatron says (12:03 AM):
thanks too, knowing this maynot sounds nice
but not to tear u down lah
ha

[yeu@nn] says (12:04 AM):
i noe... it doesn't sound nice...
but i need it

Galvatron says (12:04 AM):
just to summarize what i observe

[yeu@nn] says (12:04 AM):
tks so much for speaking truth in love
i know... i tink i sensed it... it's just tt i haven't fully thot thru


Galvatron says (12:04 AM):
 if u look into some of your blog articles, u can see it in some of it

  [yeu@nn] says (12:04 AM):
 maybe i was too lazy
 :\

Galvatron says (12:04 AM):
 the way the u penned ur tots

[yeu@nn] says (12:04 AM):
 the public one?
 or private?

Galvatron says (12:04 AM):
 both

  [yeu@nn] says (12:05 AM):
 ha
 yup...

Galvatron says (12:05 AM):
 in relationship..this may cause conflicts n frustration to keep recurring
 no matter where u go
 who u interact with

  [yeu@nn] says (12:06 AM):
 *nods head*
 yah
 agree


[...]

Galvatron says (12:19 AM):
don't box Him up

[yeu@nn] says (12:19 AM):
AMEN
hai...
i very stupid
:P
i box myself blue black

Galvatron says (12:20 AM):
guess it's prob your inclination to see things in one direction
at times

[yeu@nn] says (12:20 AM):
very true
esp if emotions are involved
danger zone
the blind side

Galvatron says (12:21 AM):
yeah..

[yeu@nn] says (12:21 AM):
any advice on guarding against this?

Galvatron says (12:22 AM):
reflect more

[yeu@nn] says (12:22 AM):
the troublesome thing abt the blind side is tt u often dun see it until it's too late

Galvatron says (12:22 AM):
ask God to help u to see more

[yeu@nn] says (12:22 AM):
AMEN

Galvatron says (12:22 AM):
ask HS to prompt u more

[yeu@nn] says (12:22 AM):
AMEN!
yes!
tks for reminding me
=D

Galvatron says (12:22 AM):
to see angles that u can't see

[yeu@nn] says (12:22 AM):
hooray

Galvatron says (12:23 AM):
also be open to alternative views from others

[yeu@nn] says (12:23 AM):
yah... but i guess i am open to alt views from others... or at least i do think so
but there are times.

Galvatron says (12:24 AM):
i am talking more about when it seems hard to accept because it is so different from your view

[yeu@nn] says (12:24 AM):
ah
i see

Galvatron says (12:24 AM):
yeah
sometimes the reasoning for such hard to accept views are actually not wrong in itself
but prehaps we're just not open
and insist it our way
kind of like cultureshock kind of effect

[yeu@nn] says (12:26 AM):
oh...
hmm
u describe it accurately
but i was wondering, i do insist and am not open, 'cos i guess i see it as a matter of right versus wrong

but yah
nw thinking further

Galvatron says (12:27 AM):
how do u know u're 101% correct?
and the other party is 0% correct

[yeu@nn] says (12:28 AM):
tt's a very good pt bro

Galvatron says (12:29 AM):
how do u know u have covered every inch of perspective to conclude?

[yeu@nn] says (12:29 AM):
ah
true

Galvatron says (12:29 AM):
especially in areas where it is not obviously disputable
like against WOG

it is easier to appreciate our own view than others

our view is formulated wholly in our mind, experience , values, understanding , perspectives et
etc
to appreciate others it usually takes more effort esp with someone who is different from us
in character, personality, personal experience etc

Galvatron says (12:34 AM):
can see it this way..love is not rude
ha
not saying u're ruf
rude

just to illustrate we can be not rude to try as best as we can to appreciate the other party's view

love is patient
patient to seek understanding

[yeu@nn] says (12:37 AM):
AMEN
i still have so much ... a super long way to grow in love
tk God for His patience with me

tks bro... really really appreciate ur sharing

Galvatron says (12:38 AM):
no prob
just sharing my own learning journey too

[yeu@nn] says (12:38 AM):
how u r able to analyse and think it thru... and also use the Word of God accurately..

Galvatron says (12:38 AM):
my tots from my contemplation

[yeu@nn] says (12:38 AM):
very blessed
haha
i am very blessed
tks for digesting it for me LOL

Galvatron says (12:38 AM):
glad to bless

[yeu@nn] says (12:39 AM):
haha
yah...
hmm
right
reflect more...
and pray to God

Galvatron says (12:40 AM):
yeah...reflection is like a bread n butter

[yeu@nn] says (12:40 AM):
ask Him to help me be aware of this blind side

Galvatron says (12:40 AM):
looking at the mirror
this one have to be very intentional haha
intentionally staring into the mirror

[yeu@nn] says (12:41 AM):
the blind side?

Galvatron says (12:41 AM):
yeah..

[yeu@nn] says (12:41 AM):
yah...
u know..
i think God has been helping me sense it...
it's just tt i haven't sat down to think deeper abt it
and pen it down into words

Galvatron says (12:41 AM):
ic
let God renew your mind then haha

[yeu@nn] says (12:42 AM):
sure
but yes
God speaks thru u too
grateful
to know tt i dun have to go thru this journey alone

Galvatron says (12:42 AM):
:)

[yeu@nn] says (12:42 AM):
hahaha
haaa

the journey ahead looks long indeed
24km route march

Galvatron says (12:43 AM):
haha
ok lah..perserver
persevere

[yeu@nn] says (12:43 AM):
tks bro
=)
yay
persevere

Galvatron says (12:43 AM):
no prob

[yeu@nn] says (12:44 AM):
yup
perseverance must complete its work in me
so tt i may be mature and complete
not lacking anything
and can also ask God for wisdom too
hooray
:D

Galvatron says (12:45 AM):
yup :)

Sunday, February 7, 2010

The Beautiful Beatitudes

Blessed are the poor in spirit,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
[R]IGHT at the beginning of his Sermon on the Mount, Jesus contradicted all human judgments and all nationalistic expectations of the kingdom of God. The kingdom is given to the poor, not the rich; the feeble, not the mighty; to little children humble enough to accept it, not to soldiers who boast that they can obtain it by their own prowess.
John R. W. Stott, The Message of the Sermon on the Mount

GOD DOES NOT force his kingdom upon anybody but gladly gives it to all who know they're losers without him and humbly seek his help.
Clarence Jordan, Sermon on the Mount

Blessed are those who mourn,
for they will be comforted.
IT IS NOT ENOUGH for us … within the arena of the world's pain merely to know of a God who sympathizes. It is not even enough to know of a God who heals. We need to know of and be connected with a God who experiences with us, for us, each grief, each wound. We need to be bonded with a God who has had nails in the hands and a spear in the heart!
Flora Slosson Wuellner, Weavings

Blessed are the meek,
for they will inherit the earth.
THE SCRIPTURES make much of meekness … and so it is the more appalling that meekness does not characterize more of us who claim to be Christians. Both at the personal level, where we are too often concerned with justifying ourselves rather than with edifying our brother, and at the corporate level, where we are more successful at organizing rallies, institutions, and pressure groups than at extending the kingdom of God, meekness has not been the mark of most Christians for a long time.
D. A. Carson, The Sermon on the Mount

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
for they will be filled.
THE HUNGER for righteousness is the one appetite that Christ blesses—not to covet possessions or achievement or recognition, but to live, through every action and perception, the kingdom of God.
Jim Forest, The Ladder of the Beatitudes

Blessed are the merciful,
for they will be shown mercy.
[THE MERCIFUL] will be found consorting with publicans and sinners, careless of the shame they incur thereby. In order that they may be merciful, they cast away the most priceless treasure of human life, their personal dignity and honor.
For the only honor and dignity they know is their Lord's own mercy, to which alone they owe their very lives.
Dietrich Bonhoeffer, The Cost of Discipleship

Blessed are the pure in heart,
for they will see God.
NOW when [people] attempt to live a double life spiritually, that is, to appear pure on the outside but are not pure in the heart, they are anything but blessed. Their conflicting loyalties make them wretched, confused, tense. And having to keep their eyes on two masters at once makes them cross-eyed, and their vision is so blurred that neither image is clear.
Clarence Jordan, Sermon on the Mount

Blessed are the peacemakers,
for they will be called sons of God.
NOW PEACEMAKING is a divine work. For peace means reconciliation, and God is the author of peace and of reconciliation. … It is hardly surprising, therefore, that the particular blessing which attaches to peacemakers is that "they shall be called sons of God." For they are seeking to do what their Father has done, loving people with his love.
John R. W. Stott, The Message of the Sermon on the Mount

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness,
for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
IT MAY SEEM strange that Jesus should pass from peacemaking to persecution, from the work of reconciliation to the experience of hostility. Yet however hard we may try to make peace with some people, they refuse to live at peace with us. Not all attempts at reconciliation succeed.
John R. W. Stott, The Message of the Sermon on the Mount

JESUS' CLIMAX at the end of the Beatitudes says exactly this: Stand faithful and do not get blown about by the ideologies of the world. … If we lose our distinction from the world's greed, uncaring, self-centeredness, exclusionism, unfaithfulness, and violence, then we have no purpose.
Glen H. Stassen, Living the Sermon on the Mount

Saturday, February 6, 2010

A Prayer of Confession

So tired, Lord. So tired.

Everything seems a blank.

I was staring, a bit dazed, at the screen just now.

Maybe I feel dazed, because everything seems so blank. Maybe it's like seeing a bleak winter landscape.

Felt overwhelmed and felt inadequate and a bit lost. What am I doing, actually?

I'm not even doing or planning anything purposeful. It feels like I'm just doing fire-fighting here and there. Do one project, do another. Take care of this duty, that duty. Help my parents, take care of my sheep, meet him up every week. And just before you've managed to finishing reloading ur ammo, the next wave comes again. Duty in, duty out. And you have this vague feeling of guilt for not setting aside a time to meet up people, and outreach. And oh, suddenly you remember you've been intending to exercise - and study your Bible... one month ago.

Gosh. And my response to all these is to pull the blanket over my head, as if though that would help. And you sleep some more, and then you wake up even later... and feel even more demoralized, because you know that you've wasted so much precious time.

And from somewhere, you hear this verse: "How long will you lie there, you sluggard? A moment's sleep, a moment's slumber, and poverty will come upon you like a bandit."

And the demoralization gets even heavier.

As the days go by, it seems that no matter what weather it's outside, it's always a gray drizzle in my soul each morning.

Deep sigh...
Father, am I really depressed? Cannot be lah...




Prayed.

And... as I opened my Bible, my eyes fell on Psalm 61.

Read it. Then Psa 62.

I feel the strong, loving arms of my Creator, my Father, wrapped around me. And He is reminding me,
"It's ok. Yes, I want you to work hard, plan well, and be wise. But... Yeu Ann, at the heart of it all is love. I am strong, remember that. And I am loving. Remember, I reward each one according to what he has done... should not that encourage you to get up each day for the glory of my Name? Take heart, Yeu Ann. I didn't say I'll reward you according to how fast you do it! I'll reward you according to WHAT you have done!"

And I am so... touched and trembling.

Grace that gives me the same reward, whether I've started working in the first hour or the last hour of the day. How could I forget? Grace, from the beginning to the end. Jesus, the Beginning and the End, the First and the Last, the Alpha and the Omega.

God's kindness is so great. How can I take His kindness for granted? I am so unworthy, but He is so kind to a sinner like me.

Oh God. I'm so sorry. I haven't been taking time to show love to my family. I did show a bit of love to my colleagues. But my brothers and sisters... I do not think I have showed love to them. I am selfish and sucking, always consuming and never giving.

But I think He whispers in reply: "It's ok, son. I do not condemn you. Just go. Go and show people what it means to live a life worthy of My calling. The full message of this life. Seek Me every morning; I will give you what you need. And put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience each morning."

Remember, Yeu Ann, it is all about Jesus. His loving kindness and grace has already empowered you to speak warm words of love to those around you. To bless and care. And He never, never condemns you. Only the devil does that, but are you going to listen to the voice of the Good Shepherd or are you going to listen to the devil?

Satan tells you you cannot do it, because of all your past failures. He mocks you, you who are created in the image of God. But Jesus, our Friend... and our Righteous Advocate and Redeemer... steps in and rebutts the evil one. "Yeu Ann is mine, and mine alone. I have bought him. I have redeemed him. I call him by a new name."

Lord, now is the last hour of the day. Please help me wisely plan my time so that I can make fuller use of my time. To be more intentional in discipling people... in making every step count. Lord, thank You for being with me, and loving me, and forgiving me. Thank You for not holding anything against me, but You will guide me and discipline me to teach me and lead me, and train me in righteousness, so that I may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

With this in mind, Father, I pray in Jesus' name, help me change the way I pray tomorrow morning. Remember these words that I write as a prayer to You. Please help me love Your Word more, and start studying it deeper. It is never too late to restart and carry on. But oh God, give me strength to overcome procrastination - and perfectionism - and laziness. This sloth will eat away at my soul. I need help, Lord.

Oh Lord. I feel a renewed sense of a fresh hope infusing my soul again with a sweet fragrance. The aroma of Christ, like a fresh cup of Starbucks tea. Thank You for Your very great and precious promises. Thank You so much my Lord. Thank You Father. Yes, Lord, yes, Lord, yes we can. Amen.

And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.

1 Corinthians 13

1Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.

2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.

3And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.

4Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,

5Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;

6Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;

7Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.

8Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.

9For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.

10But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.

11When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.

12For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

13And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.

Come, Passion

Hmm. I woke up late today. Actually... I would have woken up earlier, but just feeling a bit listless. I've been thinking about this: where's the passion to get me out of bed every morning?

I think I heard this quote before: If your life has passion, you should be able to jump out of your bed every morning! Well, I'm not exactly jumping out of bed these few weeks... Rolling off and crawling is more like it.

I must confess, even spiritually-wise, I find it hard to sit down and read my Bible, to talk with God. I think I greet God the same way as I do my dad - grumble with half-shut eyes.

Hmm. Grumbling. Not good at all. I mean, God has done so many good things for me. Things that troubled me... God has given and has taken care of.

What, then, does my heart truly look for?

Maybe I guess one reason might be I've been doing too much work already?

No? Maybe it's lack of self-discipline that affects the way I see work?

Or this "quarter-life crisis"? (I don't think so...)

It's strange. I know my life has meaning. I know that God has given me a calling. I know that I have eternal life, because of what He did for me.

So why am I still feeling tired and nuah?

Yeu Ann, what is your heart looking for today, really?

Jesus I am thirsty
Won't You come and fill me
Earthly things have left me dry
Only You can satisfy
All I want is more of You

Detente?

Totally surprised, to be honest. But yes, this really is 2010 - the first year of many marvellous things! God really works in a mysterious way, His wonders to perform.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Help Carry One Another's Burdens in Love

Was listening to a dear friend share his/her anxiety about something. As I was thinking of what to say to encourage him/her, I realise that I also have my own anxieties. And that this friend has encouraged me before as well.

Reminded that in the pilgrim's journey, everyone has his or her own worries and burdens and fears. What I struggle with, someone else may not. But what that someone else struggles with, I realise I don't struggle. So... we help carry one another's burdens.

Is Christianity about comparative righteousness? No, it's about helping carry one another's burdens. And so in this way we fulfill the law of Christ - the law of fellowship, the law of love...
Jesus: "So in everything do unto others as you would have them do unto you, for it sums up the Law and the Prophets."

A Refreshing SMS!

Just got this refreshing SMS from Edmund, one of the CLs in the NUS ministry - a dear friend and brother to me:
"Hey bro sorry late reply. Just had cg. I was pretty refreshed past few days even though it was tiring to go back to sch daily after work. Whenever I'm reminded of God's heart for the people, a new surge of energy refreshes me. Thanks bro for interceeding [sic] for me n others :)"

God's heart for the people. How could I have forgotten? No wonder I am tired and have forgotten John 3:16 in my heart. Forgive me Lord for my self-centredness! Help me hear Your shepherd's heart for the lost, for the flocks of Your pastures...

Kick my backside, Master, I have to stop nuahing around here! Amen!
Feel sick in my stomach. Procrastination does that.

A dear brother asked me today how I felt about my $200 that I left behind in the ATM. I shared with him that I did feel a bit affected - not so much about the $200, because I entrusted it to God to take care of. It's just that some other things happened, so all these things make me feel emotionally strained. And I am struggling to get my work done.

So he asked me, "How do you handle these feelings, especially when you find it hard to move on?"

I told him that I just don't have much choice - I just have to pray, and then push on. No choice, right? Just push through the mud lor.

Then he replied, "Oh... just go through it ah... For me, it's not easy actually..."

Man, that made me smile. Because felt very relieved when he confessed that. It is good to know that I am not alone. That both of us can identify with each other.

Dear Father, may You use this precious friendship of ours that You have planted, to help spur and encourage one another on more and more to do Your will and love You more. In Jesus' name, Amen.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Faith Takes Time

Sometimes when God gives a vision and a calling, and says it will come to pass...

It may take 40 years. Think of David.
It may take 80 years. Think of Moses.
It may take 100 years. Think of Abraham.
It may take 120 years. Think of Noah.
It may take 400 years. Think of the Israelites in Egypt.
Or it may take 9 months. Think of Mary.
Or it may take 7 days. Think of the battle of Jericho.
Or it may take 3 days. Think of Jesus.

Or it may take 2000 years... and still going on. Think of the Great Commission.
Hebrews 11:13,39-40
All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised; they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. [...] These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.

Greater Things Are Yet To Come, Greater Things Are Yet To Be Done!

This listing below, I think, describes my weaknesses so well. However, looking through the list, I realise that God has changed me a lot in some of these areas... especially the ones in italics over the past 10 years. I think God has really changed me a LOT in empathy, to grow more sensitive and caring to others' feelings - a total change from last time.


But I know that there's some areas in bold that God is now showing to me that I need to work on and grow. These are some of the deeper and harder battles to be fought - I mean, I know that I have these issues since primary or even kindergarten days! However, we have God to help us fight the battles - the battle belongs to the Lord. And not by might, nor by power, but by the Spirit of the living God.

I'm not saying that seeing these areas as weaknesses is condoning them as 'not my fault'. No... every personality has tendencies that make them more vulnerable to certain sins than others. We are fallen creatures, after all. That's why thank God for the Church. Together we help carry one another's burdens... together we help one another grow and be all that God created us to be.

Potential weaknesses of an INFP:
Most of the weaker characteristics that are found in INFPs are due to their dominant Feeling function overshadowing the rest of their personality. When the dominant function of Introverted Feeling overshadows everything else, the INFP can't use Extraverted iNtuition to take in information in a truly objective fashion. In such cases, an INFP may show some or all of the following weaknesses in varying degrees:

  • May be extremely sensitive to any kind of criticism
  • May perceive criticism where none was intended
  • May have skewed or unrealistic ideas about reality
  • May be unable to acknowledge or hear anything that goes against their personal ideas and opinions
  • May blame their problems on other people, seeing themselves as victims who are treated unfairly
  • May have great anger, and show this anger with rash outpourings of bad temper
  • May be unaware of appropriate social behavior
  • May be oblivious to their personal appearance, or to appropriate dress
  • May come across as eccentric, or perhaps even generally strange to others, without being aware of it
  • May be unable to see or understand anyone else's point of view
  • May value their own opinions and feelings far above others
  • May be unaware of how their behavior affects others
  • May be oblivious to other people's need
  • May feel overwhelmed with tension and stress when someone expresses disagreement with the INFP, or disapproval of the INFP
  • May develop strong judgments that are difficult to unseed against people who they perceive have been oppressive or suppressive to them
  • Under great stress, may obsess about details that are unimportant to the big picture of things
  • Under stress, may obsessively brood over a problem repeatedly
  • May have unreasonable expectations of others
  • May have difficulty maintaining close relationships, due to unreasonable expectations
A lot of trouble is bound to come, when you desire to do God's will. You'll be misunderstood left, right and centre - even by your own brothers and sisters. You'll want to quit at some point... maybe even collapse to the ground. All your mistakes, errors and failures will be exposed. All your sinfulness too. And oh, you get to die every day. Pain and trouble will be your friends indeed. Loneliness too. Maybe those you trusted to stay by your side... will disappear in your darkest hour.

And maybe... maybe... you might misunderstand God's will at one point or another. You'll probably sink while walking on water. God may not meet your expectations nor grant your dearest wishes.

Will you still seek to do God's will anyway?

A Thick and Dreadful Darkness

Genesis 15:12
As the sun was setting, Abram fell into a deep sleep, and a thick and dreadful darkness came over him.

This journey of faith is very long indeed. How long, O Lord?

Missions Meetings!

Far East
I “Heart” Far East meeting on the coming Tuesday, 9th of Feb from 7.45pm to 9.30pm in Europe Room.  Come and find out more about these countries and cities. 


RSVP with Jasmine Poon at yhpoon [@] hopesingapore [.] org [.] sg.








South America


Dear fellow missionary,


Thank you for your response to God's call to be on His front lines of winning the world. Without such hearts as yours, God's kingdom would take so much longer to build on this earth.

It must have taken quite a lot of reflection before you ticked the box for "I am interested to go". I cannot begin to imagine that thoughts that must have gone through your head. "Am I ready? Can I make such an impact? Am I good enough?" etc. Ask any church planter and they would tell you that even after having been there and done that, they still cannot find the answers to such questions. But one thing they will tell you is that God always has the answers and most of the time, He works best with those who don't.

On the 11 February, an event will be organized specially for you. It is an event where we hope to be able to tell you a little more about what South America, and what it means to actually church plant in that continent. It will also be a time where you will have a chance to air your views and ask your questions.

An email will follow this very soon with all the details as to the time and venue for the event. But we do hope that you would firstly block out the evening of this day, so that we could have some time together.

May the Lord continue to guide you as you grow in Him.

God bless.
Hope South America Missions

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Focus!

How timely. I just came across Cedric's blog post on FOCUS from his Twitter. :) Mmm. God works in mysterious ways, yes?

As the proverb goes, ‘Let your eyes look straight ahead, and your eyelids look right before you’, we should keep running toward our dreams and visions and keep moving forward.

‘You can’t walk or run your course looking sideways at how others are running, or looking back letting the past ruin your present or future.’ says Dr Phil Pringle, who is an author, artist and a sought after international speaker. He added that ‘staying focused and undistracted is more about what you don’t do! Say NO to the things that distract you from your goal.’ [read more]

Maybe I Don't Need To Know After All.

Dear Lord, the journey of faith is sometimes so long and so ... just need more patience to wait. Oh God. The promise... I still am confused. The Ups and The Downs are very... stomach-churning. Like a roller-coaster ride.

But You are good through it all, and I don't know what's going to happen next. But don't let me demand that You meet my expectations, but help me bend my knee to Your will.

But one thing I ask of You, Father: hold my hand through it all. That is the most important thing of all - to know that You are with me.

Or maybe not. Maybe I don't even have to know that You are with me. Because You promised your presence, whether I feel it or not.

Psalm 73
21 When my heart was grieved
and my spirit embittered,

22 I was senseless and ignorant;
I was a brute beast before you.

23 Yet I am always with you;
you hold me by my right hand.

24 You guide me with your counsel,
and afterward you will take me into glory.

25 Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.

26 My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.
Thank You Lord.

The Way To Help Someone Fulfill His/Her Dream

I think the way to help someone fulfill his/her dream is not really to ask, "So how are you going to do it? What are your plans for accomplishing it?"

You might as well ask an explorer who wants to explore an unknown country whether he's got a map of it and where all the rest stops are. Duh! Of course he can't tell you what it's going to be like - there's no map, no photos, nobody else who has gone that way before.

Especially if it's a journey of faith, in response to God's calling, like Abraham.

When I shared about my dream with one sister, the sister asked me bluntly, "So what are you going to do about it?" I was taken back. I think she meant well, as in her belief was that it is good to have a set of plans. But... I think that picture is inadequate.

Sometimes to launch a dream, you need to talk and share about it more. That we need a chance to articulate our ideals and confess our convictions. The very act of speaking it aloud actually has power - and this is a biblical principle: confessing aloud to others what we believe God has called us to do. It takes courage actually. Sharing about your dreams to others is one step towards seeing it fulfilled.

I think the saying, "No Action Talk Only", in this context, may be highly discouraging. I know our culture values action over talk, but think about it a bit more carefully. Words have power - and what did David the shepherd boy do first before he tried to take on Goliath? He asked around, in an attempt to rally and rouse his countrymen, "What is going to be done for the man who kills this man who insults our God and our army?" Remember he was just a boy - and see what was the outcome.

Maybe a better way to help that someone would be to accompany that person... or give material / moral / spiritual support. To help equip him with whatever you think is needed for the journey ahead. I think whether the person has made grand plans in a sense doesn't really matter so much. What matters is whether the person is taking steps towards that dream, no matter how small or uncertain it may seem.

Remember Abraham's journey? He had to go through a few detours. But through the detours, he never lost sight of his vision. So don't ask the person how come he's not doing what he has set out to do - rather, ask him whether he still has the vision in his heart and his mind.

And even if we still have the God-given vision in our hearts... I think sometimes we Christians may not look like we're doing anything. Because for us Christians, we believe that this is not only about us. God is also our key partner in this venture of faith. There are times when we have to just wait upon Him to see what He wants us to do next. Sometimes the waiting upon Him for guidance can be a far greater test of faith and obedience than doing something. Think Abraham waiting for his Isaac... and succumbing to the shortcut of having sex with his wife's maidservant to fulfill God's promise Abraham's way. And the famous missionary, Jim Elliot, after his graduation from college, chose not to jump straight into finding a job, like the rest of his peers. He chose to wait upon God for half a year, doing odd-jobs and getting concerned questions from his relatives about his joblessness. He chose to wait upon God to see where God wanted him to go next. Because he had the dream of reaching out to a nation that did not know Jesus yet. And the rest is history.

Remember that even if God has called you to do something wonderful, far beyond your wildest dreams... there are times He will lead you on a huge detour. Never lose hope of touching the Promised Land, and even more importantly, never ever lose your faith and return to the land of slavery in your hearts.

And I think, the most important thing would be to help that person to keep focusing on God. Not even the fulfillment of the dream, but upon God. Because if the dream is of human vision, it will not endure, even if it comes to pass. But if it is of God, whoa. Remind the person that all our dreams and hopes must ultimately spring from doing the Father's will. Apart from Jesus we can do nothing. Because in the end it is not about ourselves, but about bringing glory to God.

And that is the difference between the world, and the church.
There's a lot of emphasis today on practical preaching, helping people address their felt-needs, and giving direct application. Is that foremost in your mind when you prepare a message?

When I prepare to teach a text there are a few questions I always ask. First, "What's the thing behind the thing?" and "What's the truth behind the truth?" So if we're talking about tithing, we're really talking about generosity and participation. And if we're talking about generosity and participation, then we're really talking about whether you view the world as a scarcity or as a world governed by a Trinitarian God. Is the universe at its core a sliced-up pie where you grab your slice and then protect and defend it? Or do you believe that at the core there is an endlessly self-giving, loving community of God we are invited to step into?

So you can talk about tithing—giving your 10 percent. Or you can wrestle with a scarcity versus a Trinitarian view of the universe with tithing perhaps being an implication at the end of the message.


So you're trying to help people see a larger view of reality, through the lens of the gospel, rather than just giving them practical application.

Yes, exactly. I call it the truth behind the truth; the mystery behind the mystery; reality behind the reality. If you say we're going to do a series on marriage for the next five weeks, there's a chance that people who's aren't married, who are single, or who are divorced are going to think, Well, I guess I don't have to show up for five weeks.

Another way to approach the subject is to see marriage as one of the applications of the truth behind the truth. The truth behind the truth would lead you to preach one week on being honest, the next on apologizing, and the next on serving others. Those truths apply to everyone. And then each week you might include a point on how it applies to marriage.


Does our inability to find the truth behind the truth explain why we ignore large sections of the Bible in our preaching? We just don't see much practical how-to in Obadiah?

It's interesting you bring this up because when our church started, I spent the first year and a half preaching through Leviticus verse by verse. But now it's a part of our church's DNA to assume that every text has something for us—even ones that make no sense the first time you read them.

It may be my own warped sense of humor, but it was always the odd places in the Bible that I found most compelling. It's God's inspired Word, and it's all useful. But to really believe that—that's when things get interesting. I'd rather trust God, jump into those texts, and discover what God has for us.

I really like the idea of throwing yourself at its mercy. I'm just assuming there will be things here. Last year we did Philippians verse by verse. It took the whole year. I always begin with the assumption that there is way more going on in the text than we see on the first reading.

The Most Interesting Preacher In the World

From Christianity Today: Tying the Clouds Together
He once planted a church by teaching through Leviticus. He can use a rabbit carved from a bar of soap to illustrate the nature of suffering. Google his name and the term "Sex God" will appear among the top entries.

Rob Bell is the most interesting preacher in the world.

Bell is the founding pastor of Mars Hill Bible Church in Grand Rapids, Michigan, but his reputation as an innovative communicator came largely through his video teaching series, NOOMA. Since launching Mars Hill in 1999, Bell's ministry has expanded into books, DVDs, and live tours, but he is still committed to shepherding his community at Mars Hill through preaching.

Leadership managing editor Skye Jethani sat down with Bell to discuss his approach to communicating, the state of preaching in the church, and the risks the pulpit presents to a pastor's soul.

Your sermons are known for pulling from unexpected sources—everything from art history to quantum physics. Why?

When Jacob woke up after his vision of angels ascending and descending on the ladder, he declared, "Surely God was in this place and I did not know it." And Jesus says, "My Father is always at work even to this very day." Jesus lives with an awareness, an assumption that God is here and he's at work. Dallas Willard calls this "the God-bathed world." This has deeply shaped me.

My assumption is that God can be found in all of the interesting things buzzing around us all the time. So we can take something from here and something from there and bring them together. A friend of mine calls it "tying the clouds together."
Yes, this article totally describes what I've been feeling and thinking. It's a fantastic article for all who would want to teach and communicate from the Scriptures. Thinking of sending this link to some of our dear pastors to bless them! :)

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Nuclear Energy in Singapore? Maybe Can...

I read today's news about the potential of Singapore using nuclear energy.

Then read the Online Citizen's article: The truth about nuclear energy

Think a lot of the concerns for nuke energy that others have posted on The Online Citizen's article are very valid. I mean, nuke fallout will render land unusable for hundreds, if not thousands, of years - just look at Chernobyl.

However, there's another nuke technology - the use of thorium reactors. R&D was done in the field of thorium power from the '50s to the '70s, and thorium reactors now can have a zero-risk meltdown potential. However, the USA chose to focus on uranium reactors instead, because uranium would allow them to make nuke weapons.

But 40 years later, esp w the need for less CO2-generating techs, researchers have started looking into thorium power generation again. There are a lot of sensible reasons for looking into thorium (see chart below):


And thorium nuke plants have a zero-risk of meltdown. That means if one of the reactors kena ter-ba-bom, then at least Singapore will still be a little red dot, not a green glowing dot. :P

I think this might be the kind of nuclear technology that the committee was talking about:
'Advances in nuclear technology will make it much safer than earlier designs, and we should carefully study its viability for a small city-state like Singapore,' said the committee's report.

If that's so, it would be great, and I think I would support the government's decision on this. However, I think we should first ask the committee what kind of technologies and protections they would use. Transparency in this kind of assessment is an absolute must. If they want to use uranium technology, with all its dangers... I am so going to protest man.

But I like one commenter's quip:
if new water is ok then nuclear plant is ok. their children also live here.
So, haha, perhaps we need not be too worried on this matter regarding nuclear energy. Governance isn't easy, huh? :P

Suggested articles for further reading:
1. World Nuclear Association: Thorium

2. Technology Review: Cleaner Nuclear Power?

3. Wired.com: Uranium Is So Last Century — Enter Thorium, the New Green Nuke

4. Cosmos Magazine: New age nuclear

Brain cancer tests a young pastor’s faith

Matt Chandler, center, holds hands with his son Reid, 4, left, and daughter Audrey, 7, in Flower Mound, Texas, on Jan. 4 as they take a walk after a treatment for Matt's brain cancer.

Chandler is trying to suffer well. He would never ask for such a trial, but in some ways he welcomes this cancer. He says he feels grateful that God has counted him worthy to endure it. He has always preached that God will bring both joy and suffering but is only recently learning to experience the latter.

Since all this began on Thanksgiving morning, Chandler says he has asked "why me?" just once, in a moment of weakness.

He is praying that God will heal him. He wants to grow old, to walk his two daughters down the aisle and see his son become a better athlete than he ever was.

Whatever happens, he says, is God's will, and God has his reasons. For Chandler, that does not mean waiting for his fate. It means fighting for his life.

[...] Matt prays that his children and others do not grow resentful.

"Lord, you gave this to me for a reason. Let me run with it and do the best I can with it."

Barnett says later that he's witnessed many tragedies and miracles. He has seen how people handle life-changing moments. He called Chandler's attitude one of the most amazing he's seen.

Chandler says learning he had brain cancer was "kind of like getting punched in the gut. You take the shot, you try not to vomit, then you get back to doing what you do, believing what you believe.

"We never felt — still have not felt — betrayed by the Lord or abandoned by the Lord. I can honestly say, we haven't asked the question, 'Why?' or wondered, 'Why me, why not somebody else?' We just haven't gotten to that place. I'm not saying we won't get there. I'm just saying it hasn't happened yet." [read more...]



The quote, "He says he feels grateful that God has counted him worthy to endure it," caught my attention.
Acts 5:40b-42
They called the apostles in and had them flogged. Then they ordered them not to speak in the name of Jesus, and let them go.

41The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name. 42Day after day, in the temple courts and from house to house, they never stopped teaching and proclaiming the good news that Jesus is the Christ.


I remember the time I went through my HYP. I was feeling very frustrated, and I let it show in my CG. The reasoning I had was that it is ok to share my frustrations in caregroup. Now, looking back, I ponder about the truth of that statement. To what extent is it ok to be "real"? To share? Or ... is there a higher vantage point from which we can rejoice in our sufferings, and yet be as real as pure gold?

This post challenges my reasonings, and exposes to me the inadequacy of my thoughts. I was also thinking about what Hong Teck told me a few weeks ago. He told me that we shouldn't be asking "Why", but "How" questions. Not "Why did this happen to me?", but "How do I move on to do what God wants me to do?" / "What do I do next?"

And now I see more clearly what he meant. I've been taught before that it is good to make sense of our experiences. But now I realise that this is only one part of the equation. We make sense of our experiences and we try to figure out what God may want us to show or teach us. But... I think, there are times that you cannot make sense. It is ok. It is better to trust in God and just keep going on, listening to His voice call you on, even though it is pitch-black. Because, when you persevere on, He may bring you up to the mountaintop and allow you to see the Promised Land.

Maybe. Or maybe not - not on this side of life.

Hong Teck reminded me that there are times that there are simply no clear answers to our pains. But we shouldn't cry out "Why?" I look to Job for an example. And Job's final response to God, through his journey of pain and suffering, is: Lord, I accept Your perfect will. Not my will but Yours be done. I spoke of things too big to understand. But You are too wise for me to argue with. So I despise myself and repent in ashes.

Theodicy. The problem of pain. In a clear-cut example of this age-old question of pain and suffering, when Jesus and His disciples saw a man born blind from birth, the disciples tried to figure out a cause-and-effect explanation.
1As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. 2His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?"

3"Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. 4As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. 5While I am in the world, I am the light of the world."
Then Jesus went on to heal the blind man.

Let's learn from this dear brother's attitude:
"Lord, you gave this to me for a reason. Let me run with it and do the best I can with it."
And we'll show the world that God is real - and that our faith is real and with substance. I don't think anyone could reasonably accuse us of being insensitive to our feelings, because, well, the sufferer him/herself is the one saying how good God is. And that's a powerful testimony to the living hope that we have in Christ!

So may the work of God be displayed in our lives through the way we choose to respond towards our pains and sufferings. And may we never allow our sufferings to ever stop us from reaching out to others in love - not even for a moment. And may it never stop us from sharing the good news that Jesus is the Christ. Amen!

Monday, February 1, 2010

My boss chatted with me as a friend just now. She asked me, concernedly, "Yeu Ann, do you have any direction in life, actually?"

I was very surprised when she asked that. So I asked her, "Oh... how come you're asking me?"

"Well, because I was talking with this colleague... she says that you're nice but seem quite naive... as in all ideals but we're worried that you'll be too idealistic... and get disappointed. After all people do need a stable background to ground their ideals in."

Told her that frankly, I don't look like the kind who's very direction-driven, but I have a strong sense of internal direction, and ideals. My boss said that she can tell that - in fact when she first met me, she could tell that I have a set of very strong ideals. But worried that I might be too idealistic and get myself all disappointed.

I assured her that yes, I do have a very clear idea of where I'm going, and I know where I'm supposed to go. Sort like the Pilgrim's Progress, where you see the Golden City at the top of a hill, and you know WHERE you're supposed to go.

It's just that from where I am right now, my direction is limited. I can only see at most 1 or 2 years ahead. And the land in between where I am now and the vision of where I want to be is terra incognita, and as I quipped, "Here be dragons."

And shared with her a bit of the practical milestones that I've in mind.

My boss looked more assured after that, 'cos she relates to me as a friend here. (She's very nice, the nicest boss that you've probably met in a few hundred years. :))


Sharon asked me yesterday - in fact quite a number of people have been asking me what happened to the scriptwriter plan that I had, when I quit my previous career path.

I told them, it's because I'm committed to this internship thing for one year and have given my word that I'll do it for one year. And besides I am learning very practical and useful things there on the job.

But on a larger scale, I find it hard to answer these questions - and I know that people care and are concerned, because I seem to be missing my set goals. (And frankly, the world admires people who are very goal-driven, and direction-oriented. Haha... so I don't fall into their categories and mind-sets.)

But, yes, I told Sharon that this is a roundabout aspect of the journey of faith. When I set out to leave my previous career path, in response to what I know was God's clear calling for me, I knew I was emulating the example of Abraham, who by faith, obeyed God and left his homeland, even though he did not know where he was going.

In any case, I have been discussing with my shepherd in the backstage. Believe you me, I was asking him for advice regarding direction and so on, at the beginning of the year... so I hope that will assure you that what you see on the outside is not what I actually am on the inside. Never mistake slowness for aimlessness. The two are not always the same.

Personally, I think all this admiration of people who seem to have a very clear idea of what they want to do in life and have even set out five years plans, goals, milestones and so on, is very prone to totally missing the point.

Mark Batterson, a pastor of a church in Washington, tweeted today: "is your vision your agenda 4 God? Or is your vision His agenda 4 you?"

I have no interest in this nonsense about self-actualization and goal-setting and all that. It is anti-thetical to the whole fundamental of Christian discipleship: "If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself daily, take up his cross and follow Me." I am NOT saying that planning is not good. No, on the contrary, it is written in Isaiah, "But the noble man makes noble plans, and by noble deeds he stands."

It's not about what WE want in life. Or shall I say more accurately, what we THINK we want in life. God knows our needs and true desires far better than us.

We have to know WHAT God wants us to be and do and WHERE He wants you and me to go. As for the HOW part, that is where our part comes in. And I think a lot of people in church are TOTALLY missing the point - and therefore, missing out on God's best for their lives.

One of the missionaries in Indonesia said that it is NOT we plan, then we have faith in God. NO! It is we have faith in God, THEREFORE we plan. Get the message?

Following Christ means we have to learn to lay aside our plans and follow Him. What else is the meaning of this Scripture?

Mark 1:16-20
" 16As Jesus walked beside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew casting a net into the lake, for they were fishermen. 17"Come, follow me," Jesus said, "and I will make you fishers of men." 18At once they left their nets and followed him.

19When he had gone a little farther, he saw James son of Zebedee and his brother John in a boat, preparing their nets. 20Without delay he called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men and followed him."


So this is something that I hope my readers will start thinking about: don't just have directions for your life... have GOD'S direction for your life. Or you're going to the wrong show - doesn't matter how many friends or popcorn you have with you, or how long the show is - it's still the wrong show. And it's not even funny.

So it's not easy to be an Abraham. I guess I may be speaking in defence of myself, but I also speak in the hope and prayer that you will also know God's destiny and purpose for your life. I didn't know what was the specific life calling that God had in mind for me back in 2005, but after seeking God for a year, He gave me a specific vision and confirmed it so clearly - not once, not twice, but so many times. I know that the road ahead is not only difficult... it will not be well-lit too (and that's being optimistic).

Practical plans wise, that's why I'm really thankful for the brothers and sisters He has placed around me. And to encourage me. And also that I can follow in the footsteps of my shepherd - he's also surrendering to God and also wintering in the trenches too. And also he's helping me think through the practical implementations of HOW to get there.

Not easy huh? Sometimes we're not sure how we're going to fulfill the Great Commission in our lifetimes, but the Lord did promise very clearly that He has commissioned us, and SURELY he is ALWAYS with us, to the VERY END of the AGE.

Amen!
One day, a little girl went into her father's study, looking for her dad. She saw him at his work.
"Daddy, are you free to play with me?"

"Oh, not now, darling. I am very busy right now."

"Oh. Is there anything I can help you with then?"
So her dad asked her to help him fetch a particular book from another room, very far away from his study. Ecstatic, the little girl raced off to the other room, and a few minutes later, came back happily panting, handed him the book.

The father took a look at the book cover. It was the wrong one.

And the father bent down, embraced her with the biggest hug he could muster, and said, "Thank you so much, darling, for your help. You are my helpful little girl!" The little daughter happily kissed her dad and skipped out of the room.

The father then, without a word, quietly got up and went off to get the correct book.

Two Sides of The Coin: On The Difficulty of Showing Care

I think one of the scariest things about trying to show care and concern for others is the fear that people will misunderstand your intentions.

Today, I saw a brother who oftens greet people in a very friendly way. I've known him for a long time already. He's a sweet brother. But I can see that others are sometimes a bit apprehensive of him, because of his friendliness.

And I can identify with both sides. The welcomer and the welcomees. I know what it is like to be too friendly, and I know what it feels like to be on the receiving side of being too friendly. I know the pain of rejection from those whom I tried to show care for, and I've rejected those who tried to show care for me. I'm sure you have gone through that too!

Sometimes when I'm told that it's good to enfold and welcome... I do so, as best as I can. But I am worried about whether I'm being too friendly. Perhaps I rush, because I feel I should. But when I choose to just give space... I feel a sense of guilt, that I'm not doing my part. It's a difficult thing, balancing. Perhaps to others it come naturally, but I... I don't know.

We don't want to overwelcome, or to overcare, but OTOH, we don't want to not care or not welcome.

I know one of my CLs last time asked me to accompany a brother who had to go off to run an errand. The brother said no need, but my CL asked me to go accompany him anyway to show care and concern. I thought for a moment, and replied, I don't think I should accompany him. He wouldn't want it. My CL still insisted. I said no again. So my CL gave in. And to the best of my knowledge, it worked out fine after all. :) And the bro and I got along quite fine...

I guess I took a gamble that day, when choosing not to go with the bro to show care and concern for him. Because I felt that he wouldn't really appreciate that. (I think I prayed as well for guidance.) And felt that the Holy Spirit agreed with my decision.

The embarrassment of a well-meant joke, a spilled cup that you meant to give someone, accidentally pulling the wrong plug while you were trying to help pull another plug, the worry behind whether a "how are you" question would be misunderstood, etc.

I know I'm not the wisest or most capable of carers. But I guess in the final analysis, I would rather be guilty of trying too hard than be guilty of not trying at all. Perhaps death due to a well-intentioned attempt is better than living due to not trying. "...if I perish, then I perish." Esther 4:16c. At least I can learn from it... and stumble less next time. Sigh. In all our best intentions, often, we fail so many times. And we need wisdom... but oh, the learning pains.

A dear bro told me before: "The right heart with the wrong actions is better than the wrong heart with the right actions."

Still... sigh. I guess I can at least take heart that God doesn't call the qualified... He qualifies the called. :)

There was Mother Teresa who tried to minister to an old outcast brought in from the streets one day. He was horribly disfigured and dying of cancer. When Mother Teresa tried to approach the old man, the man suddenly spat into her face. He said angrily, "How can you dare to show kindness to a scum like me?" Mother Teresa patiently wiped off the spit off her face, and gently answered, "Because Jesus loves you."